Should I tell DW Turned Down One Nighter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Turned down the opportunity for a one night stand over the weekend with a good looking blonde. Went out after work withh some colleagues. One woman brought a friend. She was slim, tall and well proportioned. Maybe late 20s early 30s. After a few drinks, we all started dancing and she got very close. I really enjoyed how she smelled and was getting quite turned on. Anyone, towards the end of the evening she and my work colleague were leaving and she invited me to come with them backntomher place for another drink. I declined. I can't tell you how great it felt, though, to have a woman sexually interested in me. DW has been a cold fish for years, but we have kids, so there it is. I'm wondering if I told DA it would spark her jeolousy to see her mans still gotta it going on?

You didn't turn down a one nighter. You have no idea what would've happened at the blonde chick's house. There is never a guarantee of sex. At any point, SHE could've stopped what you perceive to be flirting. Sexually interested in you? It sounds like you're living in a fantasy world and you've been out of the game for some time. But by all means, please go shoot yourself in the foot by telling your wife. It won't spark any jealousy in her, but I guarantee it will spark something in her to drop your sorry behind. I hope she takes you for everything you're worth. Just because you're a cocky SOB.

[Anonymous]

Yes, tell her. But ask her what she thought was going on so she can connect the dots herself.

[Anonymous]

If you are smart enough to have turned her down you are smart enough to keep your mouth shut. There are no guarantees that it would have been a ONS given the other woman was there. Big deal, you had a fun night and a woman showed an interest in you. I'm sure it felt great. Leave it at that. Dealing with your cold fish wife is an entirely different issue. Telling her about your fun night has little upside.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you take your wife out dancing instead?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just because she invited you back for a drink with your colleagues doesn't mean she was going to have sex with you ho matter how flirty she was being. Unless she came out and said let's bang. Don't go shooting yourself in the foot just to make your wife jealous over a what if it could have happened.

Yes, and no don't tell your wife if you ever want to go out after work again.

[Anonymous]

Never ever ever tell her. No no no.

[Anonymous]

The only onlyway this would work in the way you hope is if the *sole* reason your wife does't want to have sex with you is that she's forgotten you're attractive and this reminds her that she could lose you. But if she thought like this and felt this way about you, its unlikely you would be complaining about her. So instead, it will likely fuel insecurity, anger, or just push her further away. or push her to have an affair.

instead, you have three choices. 1) stop asking/begging her for attention. start getting in shape (if you're not), dressing well, being and feeling fully confident. Either she will notice and start to wonder, or she wont.
2) deal with your marriage in therapy, whatever.
3) open marriage.

[Anonymous]

Don't tell her. Take that excitement and energy that you feel and rechannel it toward your wife. Forget about all the history and try to rekindle the spark. Think back to what it was that was different with the woman at the bar, how you behaved differently around her. Bring your wife out to a bar, etc.

[Anonymous]

Man here, don't tell her. Mostly, because you don't need her not trusting you when you go out. You will likely cheat at some point, like all men do in low/no sex marriages. Why raise her radar?

The jealously thing works but only if she sees it, not if you tell her about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Guy here. Don't tell her, but enjoy telling your buddies when out for a drink next time.

Nah, your buddies will just think you are a dumbass for not planting the flag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Turned down the opportunity for a one night stand over the weekend with a good looking blonde. Went out after work withh some colleagues. One woman brought a friend. She was slim, tall and well proportioned. Maybe late 20s early 30s. After a few drinks, we all started dancing and she got very close. I really enjoyed how she smelled and was getting quite turned on. Anyone, towards the end of the evening she and my work colleague were leaving and she invited me to come with them backntomher place for another drink. I declined. I can't tell you how great it felt, though, to have a woman sexually interested in me. DW has been a cold fish for years, but we have kids, so there it is. I'm wondering if I told DA it would spark her jeolousy to see her mans still gotta it going on?

telling your DW will not help. big f'cking mistake.

but if you were out and she saw an attractive blonde hitting on you, I bet she would subconsciously react, to make herself more attractive to you.

Woman are predictable like this, if you are along they think you are a loser and leave you alone, if they see you with a group of women, they think you are attractive. You could be the exact same man but have completely different reactions from females. They are like a herd of sheep.

the challenge is to how to do this while your DW is with you. and I think that is impossible. too bad so it needs to stay a good memory.

[Anonymous]

Why would you do that to your wife?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why don't you take your wife out dancing instead?

we all know the answer to this. it is plastered over other DCUM forums. he does not do the dishes, or clean the house, or make enough money, or dress well enough or one of the hundreds of excuses for a DW to not have sex with their husband. some posters think a DW is not obligated to have sex with her husband. what? can you even imagine this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You should not have been out in that situation.

This, I'd be pissed. My husband knows that if I ever got that pissed, he'd find all the money in the accounts I could easily access gone and his bags packed on the front porch.

You'd leave your husband for turning down a one night stand? You need help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Instead of telling her, why don't you get a mallet and smash your balls with it. That would be less painful for you.