Should I tell DW Turned Down One Nighter?

[Anonymous]

Man to man - if you tell her, you are an idiot.

As you should have, you rejected the advance. By telling your wife, you are probably jeopardizing your ability to peacefully to go to Vegas (or any trip of the sort) again.

Plus, it is a shitty thing to do to needlessly put those thoughts into your DW's head. It is like saying "I have options so you better appreciate me!" Pretty obnoxious.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't tell her for any reason other than being honest. I wouldn't tell her to make her jealous (WTF?) I'd want her to know I was tempted because it felt so good to be wanted and you hadn't felt that in a long time. Talk about the feeling, not how hot she was and not what your wife isn't doing. Ask her if she has ever felt that way, you might be surprised.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't tell her for any reason other than being honest. I wouldn't tell her to make her jealous (WTF?) I'd want her to know I was tempted because it felt so good to be wanted and you hadn't felt that in a long time. Talk about the feeling, not how hot she was and not what your wife isn't doing. Ask her if she has ever felt that way, you might be surprised.

Or maybe don't tell her about the experience, just that you miss feeling desired (and assume your wife feels the same).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't tell her for any reason other than being honest. I wouldn't tell her to make her jealous (WTF?) I'd want her to know I was tempted because it felt so good to be wanted and you hadn't felt that in a long time. Talk about the feeling, not how hot she was and not what your wife isn't doing. Ask her if she has ever felt that way, you might be surprised.

Nope. I would not do it. That is a good conversation to have, but not in this context.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is really obvious that you are totally insecure.

If "you still had it" you wouldn't need to tell your wife about it in order to get the validation you crave. She would know you had it without you telling her.

I think wife has been getting bored with you, hasn't been responding to your advances, and now you think your lame effort to provoke jealousy will fix it.

As a DW that was a victim of a sexless marriage, I can tell you that being sexually rejected from the one person you commit to is insulting and absolutely builds insecurity. He is a person, with feelings, and criticizing him for it is just unfair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Instead of telling her, why don't you get a mallet and smash your balls with it. That would be less painful for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man to man - if you tell her, you are an idiot.

As you should have, you rejected the advance. By telling your wife, you are probably jeopardizing your ability to peacefully to go to Vegas (or any trip of the sort) again.

Plus, it is a shitty thing to do to needlessly put those thoughts into your DW's head. It is like saying "I have options so you better appreciate me!" Pretty obnoxious.

+1

Which may or may not be true, actually, since an invitation for a drink is an invitation for a drink, and not for sex.

[Anonymous]

Guy here. Don't tell her, but enjoy telling your buddies when out for a drink next time.

[Anonymous]

Would you like to hear about your wife dancing close to a man and getting turned on and being invited back to his place?

[Anonymous]

You hardly sound innocent in all this, OP. What kind of field are you in that you and coworkers worked a weekend day, went to a bar after work, had probably too many drinks, and danced closely with other women? It all sounds terribly unprofessional. I get office happy hours, but you took it way too far. I don't think your wife should be proud of you for resisting. She should be annoyed at you for putting yourself in a bad position. And she would wonder every time you had a work engagement outside of normal hours.

[Anonymous]

This will backfire more than you can ever imagine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should not have been out in that situation.

This, I'd be pissed. My husband knows that if I ever got that pissed, he'd find all the money in the accounts I could easily access gone and his bags packed on the front porch.

[mjsmith]

tell her please.... and then come back to tell us what happened.

[Anonymous]

mjsmith wrote:tell her please.... and then come back to tell us what happened.

Lol!

[Anonymous]

NO why would you want to worry her like that? Especially if you do want to stay married.