Vent - DH won't talk about current events and it's stressing me out

[Anonymous]

UGH. I'm maybe not that bad, but close. My DH just brought up politics too many times when I'm (a) rushing in the kitchen in the morning, making lunches, (b) trying to wind down for the night, or (c) trying to relax. To him, these conversations are relaxing, but they make me tense. And now that he's done that a whole bunch of times, pretty much every time he starts, my first gut reaction is irritation.

He also has this tendency to launch into explanations, so instead of discussing what we have both read (why wouldn't he first e-mail me a link?) he'll attempt to recount the entire article (badly), and I zone out. In short, it's taken us down the wrong path, and I realize I'm overreacting, BUT IT'S SO ANNOYING.

If you can, find another friend who enjoys these conversations as much as you do, and give your DH a temporary break. Once he's completely off the hook, he will likely relax and you can ease yourself back into discussing these things once in a while.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also find such discussions depressing, plus my wife is so super woke now that I can't help but wonder if her perspective might be different if she wasn't essentially[b] a SAHM able to live off my substantial income for years.[/b] Five minutes per day max of Trump related venting by her and then I leave the room.

This is interesting to me.


Why does your wife's work status figure into the equation? DH and I are both employed people, and are both "super woke now" (not that we weren't somewhat politically active before), as are the majority of my friends who march/donate/volunteer/participate in the political process.

I agree with the pp. What does her being a SAHM have anything to do with her opinions? Are you saying that only if you work you have the right to be upset and express your opinions? I hope not!

As a working woman I get his point. She has the luxury to complain and get upset while he needs to keep it together to support their family. Some people seek drama in their lives. I have a friend like this. Trump is just one manifestation of a life pattern. That might be op as well. People like this are exhausting to listen too.

[Anonymous]

Give him Some time/space. This is likely temporary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is silly.

If my husband behaved like this I'd probably laugh. There is much much more to life than politics. It has always amazed me how so many weave their souls around this subject.

Instead of focusing on the big picture, concentrate on your home life. I'm sure there is a lot of need there.

You can't mope forever right ?

You sound like you speak from a position of entitlement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also find such discussions depressing, plus my wife is so super woke now that I can't help but wonder if her perspective might be different if she wasn't essentially[b] a SAHM able to live off my substantial income for years.[/b] Five minutes per day max of Trump related venting by her and then I leave the room.

This is interesting to me.


Why does your wife's work status figure into the equation? DH and I are both employed people, and are both "super woke now" (not that we weren't somewhat politically active before), as are the majority of my friends who march/donate/volunteer/participate in the political process.

I agree with the pp. What does her being a SAHM have anything to do with her opinions? Are you saying that only if you work you have the right to be upset and express your opinions? I hope not!

NP: If the kids are in school, she has time to devote to reading and volunteering all related to the "being woke"--and she's not tired from working. That's the difference. She has spare time to devote to activism (or just constantly reading the news and posting about it) as a hobby.

That's ridiculous. Plenty of politically active people are employed. Caring about the world you live in isn't some frivolous hobby for the privileged few.

My experience is that people who go to social meidia and compulsively post about politics have no job. Either they have a woeking spouse, lube at home as adults, or have a bunch of roommates and bounce around. They are obsessed. I can't even begin to imagine coming home to that in real life ans not being able to just tune them off. Even if i agree with them fundamentally, they seem mentally ill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also find such discussions depressing, plus my wife is so super woke now that I can't help but wonder if her perspective might be different if she wasn't essentially[b] a SAHM able to live off my substantial income for years.[/b] Five minutes per day max of Trump related venting by her and then I leave the room.

This is interesting to me.


Why does your wife's work status figure into the equation? DH and I are both employed people, and are both "super woke now" (not that we weren't somewhat politically active before), as are the majority of my friends who march/donate/volunteer/participate in the political process.

I agree with the pp. What does her being a SAHM have anything to do with her opinions? Are you saying that only if you work you have the right to be upset and express your opinions? I hope not!

NP: If the kids are in school, she has time to devote to reading and volunteering all related to the "being woke"--and she's not tired from working. That's the difference. She has spare time to devote to activism (or just constantly reading the news and posting about it) as a hobby.

That's ridiculous. Plenty of politically active people are employed. Caring about the world you live in isn't some frivolous hobby for the privileged few.

My experience is that people who go to social meidia and compulsively post about politics have no job. Either they have a woeking spouse, lube at home as adults, or have a bunch of roommates and bounce around. They are obsessed. I can't even begin to imagine coming home to that in real life ans not being able to just tune them off. Even if i agree with them fundamentally, they seem mentally ill.

You and I have different friends then.

I have a lot of very politically engaged and politically active friends who are also very much employed.