Is STA gay-friendly?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a son in the lower school, and have not been happy with some of the behavior I have seen among the boys- namely that fact that some jokingly calling other boys "gay" as a put down. I have spoken to my son at length about how unacceptable this behavior is, and that it won't be tolerated. Unfortunately not a whole lot seems to be done about it at school (and yes, I have spoken to both his teacher and another school administrator about my concerns.)

What grade?

He is in A Form (6th grade)

Something is going on with this grade this year. I have heard so many examples from several different parents that are not even friends with one another of some really mean behavior happening. I am worried a few of the nice and smart kids are going to just end up leaving the school if things don't improve.

[Anonymous]

I have a child in a different grade but know a bunch of boys in that grade, always heard it was a great grade and very cohesive. When did that change? Good friend's son is joining that grade, maybe a big group of new 7th graders will help to change the dynamic in a good way

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a child in a different grade but know a bunch of boys in that grade, always heard it was a great grade and very cohesive. When did that change? Good friend's son is joining that grade, maybe a big group of new 7th graders will help to change the dynamic in a good way

Problem is, it's not a "big group of new 7th graders." 10 - 12 or so at the most.

[Anonymous]

Yikes! This is so good to know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a child in a different grade but know a bunch of boys in that grade, always heard it was a great grade and very cohesive. When did that change? Good friend's son is joining that grade, maybe a big group of new 7th graders will help to change the dynamic in a good way

I am a different poster than above. I will chime in and say it is definitely not cohesive anymore. Very divided. Most boys are nice kids but one or two small groups of boys are creating a very very negative dynamic. They get their group plus other boys to gang up on one or two boys all at once. I thought it was just normal kid stuff until this week. I wish someone would tell the school as some parents have no idea what their kids are really like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a son in the lower school, and have not been happy with some of the behavior I have seen among the boys- namely that fact that some jokingly calling other boys "gay" as a put down. I have spoken to my son at length about how unacceptable this behavior is, and that it won't be tolerated. Unfortunately not a whole lot seems to be done about it at school (and yes, I have spoken to both his teacher and another school administrator about my concerns.)

What grade?

He is in A Form (6th grade)

Is he calling himself gay in the 6th grade?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a son in the lower school, and have not been happy with some of the behavior I have seen among the boys- namely that fact that some jokingly calling other boys "gay" as a put down. I have spoken to my son at length about how unacceptable this behavior is, and that it won't be tolerated. Unfortunately not a whole lot seems to be done about it at school (and yes, I have spoken to both his teacher and another school administrator about my concerns.)

What grade?

He is in A Form (6th grade)

Is he calling himself gay in the 6th grade?

No. I am not the poster above but no boy is calling himself gay in that grade. If I read it correctly she is saying they are using the term "gay" in a derogatory way with one another.

[Anonymous]

09:47, have you reached out to the school? It seems like you have information that should really be shared and could be helpful is resolving the issue. I would encourage you to do so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:09:47, have you reached out to the school? It seems like you have information that should really be shared and could be helpful is resolving the issue. I would encourage you to do so.

No have not and I don't feel comfortable doing so because my child is not directly involved. I'm hoping the parents who know more will contact the school but sadly I highly doubt they will.

[Anonymous]

If you relay something to the school that did not concern your kid, they will pretend it did not happen at all.... it is insulting and disturbing at the price tag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you relay something to the school that did not concern your kid, they will pretend it did not happen at all.... it is insulting and disturbing at the price tag.

I think Sta does it's best but it's difficult if the parents and boys involved don't report it to them then it's hearsay. I understand what you mean though. I think at some point some of this will just come out one way or another as either parents or boys will have had enough of it and when they do report it they will bring proof of the many incidences then it can't be questioned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you relay something to the school that did not concern your kid, they will pretend it did not happen at all.... it is insulting and disturbing at the price tag.

I think Sta does it's best but it's difficult if the parents and boys involved don't report it to them then it's hearsay. I understand what you mean though. I think at some point some of this will just come out one way or another as either parents or boys will have had enough of it and when they do report it they will bring proof of the many incidences then it can't be questioned.

Sad. You need to make sure that there is a paper trail of parents complaining to the school. I feel terrible for the poor boys who are at the receiving end of this boorish behavior, and who are seeing their parents act as bystanders to meanness. Great example you are setting for your sons. No way would I send my gay boy to StA if this is the prevalent attitude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you relay something to the school that did not concern your kid, they will pretend it did not happen at all.... it is insulting and disturbing at the price tag.

I think Sta does it's best but it's difficult if the parents and boys involved don't report it to them then it's hearsay. I understand what you mean though. I think at some point some of this will just come out one way or another as either parents or boys will have had enough of it and when they do report it they will bring proof of the many incidences then it can't be questioned.

Sad. You need to make sure that there is a paper trail of parents complaining to the school. I feel terrible for the poor boys who are at the receiving end of this boorish behavior, and who are seeing their parents act as bystanders to meanness. Great example you are setting for your sons. No way would I send my gay boy to StA if this is the prevalent attitude.

It's not prevalent - believe me- that's why the original poster was surprised. I posted other about incidences of social bullying but they didn't have anything to do with being gay. I just posted those as additional examples of things happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you relay something to the school that did not concern your kid, they will pretend it did not happen at all.... it is insulting and disturbing at the price tag.

I think Sta does it's best but it's difficult if the parents and boys involved don't report it to them then it's hearsay. I understand what you mean though. I think at some point some of this will just come out one way or another as either parents or boys will have had enough of it and when they do report it they will bring proof of the many incidences then it can't be questioned.

Sad. You need to make sure that there is a paper trail of parents complaining to the school. I feel terrible for the poor boys who are at the receiving end of this boorish behavior, and who are seeing their parents act as bystanders to meanness. Great example you are setting for your sons. No way would I send my gay boy to StA if this is the prevalent attitude.

It's not prevalent - believe me- that's why the original poster was surprised. I posted other about incidences of social bullying but they didn't have anything to do with being gay. I just posted those as additional examples of things happening.

While I certainly hope the bullying behavior is not prevalent, I wonder if the parental attitude of standing by and not speaking up is prevalent. I would not be surprised if at a boys' school you have a much stronger attitude of "boys will be boys" and letting bullying behavior slide until it gets really bad.

[Anonymous]

Well, coming from a closeted nonbinary biromantic asexual student, I'd say that most people at STA are very homophobic. Being gay is something that is frowned upon and "gay" is a term that is used in a derogatory way. However, there are some people who have come out of the closet and some straight people who are not homophobic or transphobic.