DH won't change work schedule for vacation - VENT

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Team DH, too, but also maybe you could go without him?


Op really does not sound like the kind of person who can even grocery shop without dh's help let alone go on vacation alone.
Anonymous
Agree with everyone that DH is right. As a severe asthmatic with an asthmatic child, find a different doctor. You don't want someone that hard to see. What's going on with your kid's asthma that you need to see this particular doctor?
Anonymous
Glad to see it's unanimously in favor of DH, as it should be. OP is either a troll or a nutjob. Likely both.
Anonymous
Your DH's job trumps the vacation. If your son really needs to see this doctor, then that is the right choice, even if that means no vacation. Your DH isn't making the vacation impossible; your son's health needs are. And taking care of his needs is the right choice, even though it's painful and inconvenient.

Unless, of course, there's another solution to either the doctor problem or going on vacation without DH.
Anonymous
I hope you aren't bothering with a specialist at Children's...they are the worst. Truly. I can't believe you canceled your vacation for what will likely be an uneventful appointment.
Anonymous

Lots of options here, OP:

1. Don't go to the doctor. Why does your child need this appointment so badly?

2. Vacation without your husband.

3. Stay here but treat yourself to something REALLY NICE to make up for it.

4. Reschedule vacation to some other time, some other place. Somewhere WONDERFUL.
Anonymous
One other point: in many jobs (like mine), leave needs to be approved before you can take it. In this case, your DH's leave was approved for the week that you planned. In my office, when my boss is out and I am acting in her position, if I tried to take leave when her leave was already scheduled, my change would be denied and I would have to work. I know better than to try to take leave when my boss is out; sounds like your husband has a similar situation and knows better than to even try to take the following week off.

You need to have more options for your son's care than one very much in-demand specialist. Unless your child is having an urgent asthma situation/event (in which case, your vacation should be cancelled anyways), then you make other arrangements. If your specialist works in a practice with other asthma specialists, see if you can have a check-in with one of the other doctors in the practice who can then communicate your son's check-up and condition to his regular specialist. If not, then ask the specialists office if they have another office or asthma specialist that they work with that can see your son when you cannot get appointments with the primary specialist. My wife has a significant medical condition for which we see specialists in Cinncinnati. Yes, their schedules are often very hard to get on and despite 4-6 trips a year since 2003 to see the specialists, it is hard. A couple of years ago, we were able to cut back to visits every 6 months to Cincinnati by finding referrals from her specialists for doctors in DC and Charlottesville, VA that we can see every 6 months in between (3 months after every visit to Cincinnati). These doctors can see us more easily and they communicate with the specialists after every check-in and saves us trying to coordinate around such busy specialist schedules. And this gives us options when we have emergencies.
Anonymous
Your husbands work basically pays for your life and future. He needs to bite the bullet and stay back for work. Having worked all my life I've seen every person at my employment change plans for the good of the company. Not fun but at times it needs to be done.

In a nut shell, your wrong.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Why didn't you tell the doctor that you will be on vacation that week and can't change your appointment? Then you changed the family vacation week without consulting your husband? Sorry, OP--this is on you, not your husband.


+1
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Agree with everyone that DH is right. As a severe asthmatic with an asthmatic child, find a different doctor. You don't want someone that hard to see. What's going on with your kid's asthma that you need to see this particular doctor?


+1
Anonymous
The OP has yet to return.

Anonymous
I have an extremely flexible workplace. My bosses are wonderful. There is NO way I'd change my vacation schedule at the last minute if I already said I'd be here while my boss was on vacation, to run the office for him. Unless it's a funeral of a close family member, no way.

You are being unreasonable, OP.
Anonymous
Team DH
Anonymous
Maybe DH wants to take this opportunity to show his boss he is capable of a higher level of responsibility.
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