Sister wants my DH to get nephew a job

[Anonymous]

If he can't call and ask DH to talk, he doesn't come close to deserving a second recommendation.

[Anonymous]

If I were your DH, I would be hesitant to forward another resume. Your nephew doesn't sound very motivated, even at the age of 28.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It could also be that the nephew doesn't WANT to work for the same company as his uncle but his mom is trying to steer him in that direction. In college, I worked as a summer employee for the bank my mom worked at and more recently, my sister and I worked for the same company in the same division. It can be pretty stressful knowing that everything you do reflects not only on you but your family member.

Right?? Seems like a kid smart enough to get a business degree is probably smart enough to ask for a job if he wants one. His mom wants him to get a job with your husband's company - but he's uninterested enough he already turned down one job, and didn't follow up on another one.

I think it's totally fair to let your sister know that her son is more than welcome to reach out to your husband, but that you're going to stay out of it. Let the kid deal with his mom.

Agreed. It seems nephew knows exactly what he's doing and he doesn't want mom or uncle involved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's young and made a dumb decision. It's fair to make him reach out of he wants to interview again, because that's the mature thing to do. But you eventually have to write off the first time as him being young and naive.

Anonymous wrote:
No, he's not a brat. He's new to the job hunting world and he made a mistake. That happens when you're young and inexperienced. As to helping again, I think it's a great idea to encourage your nephew to talk with your husband. Why would you hold this mistake against him forever? It's your nephew who seems to have learned his lesson the hard way.

Young and naive? No. OP says this situation occurred when her nephew finished his business agree, so it's reasonable to guess her was around 21 or 22. People at that age understand the importance of getting a job after graduation. He blew it off due to his own laziness and entitlement, not his age.

The posters who are apologists for the nephew in this thread must be raising irresponsible children who turn into irresponsible adults.

If he simply "made a mistake," he needs to learn from it and stop relying on others who he's behaved disrespectfully toward in the past to continue to do his leg work, two years later.

They may need a job, but not all of them know exactly how the working world works.

Anyway from OP's snotty comments and his pushy mom, I think nephew knows exactly what he's doing and limiting how much these people are involved in his career choices.

[Anonymous]

After you and your sister in law have figured out your nephew's job situation, I think the two of your should decide who he should fuck.

[Anonymous]

Nephew needs to earn the good-will he blew off last time. I hope you can convey this to your sister.

[Anonymous]

I would help. He's family. Family sometimes screw up, but the difference is that while you may not always give outsiders a second chance, it's good to give family a second chance. I did dumb and naive shit when I was in my 20s. Help him out, OP. He AND your sister will appreciate it.

[Anonymous]

PPs asking why nephew didn't reach out himself: maybe he's embarrassed, or didn't want to put the DH on the spot. Sister reaching out to sister is a less awkward initial approach.

[Anonymous]

Has this nephew done anything to merit your husband's recommendation?

I don't give professional recommendations unless I can vouch for the person's skills and work ethic, so I wouldn't have helped the first time around.

The second time around your husband actually does know more about the nephew - that he wouldn't deal with a commute and part - time job to get a foot in the door, that he hasn't impressed anyone since, and that he's not taking the imitative to ask for his own favors.

Instead of helping make a connection, I recommend that your husband takes this young man out for coffee and gives him solid career advice. Maybe looks over the resumé too. No networking though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's young and made a dumb decision. It's fair to make him reach out of he wants to interview again, because that's the mature thing to do. But you eventually have to write off the first time as him being young and naive.

Anonymous wrote:
No, he's not a brat. He's new to the job hunting world and he made a mistake. That happens when you're young and inexperienced. As to helping again, I think it's a great idea to encourage your nephew to talk with your husband. Why would you hold this mistake against him forever? It's your nephew who seems to have learned his lesson the hard way.

Young and naive? No. OP says this situation occurred when her nephew finished his business agree, so it's reasonable to guess her was around 21 or 22. People at that age understand the importance of getting a job after graduation. He blew it off due to his own laziness and entitlement, not his age.

The posters who are apologists for the nephew in this thread must be raising irresponsible children who turn into irresponsible adults.

If he simply "made a mistake," he needs to learn from it and stop relying on others who he's behaved disrespectfully toward in the past to continue to do his leg work, two years later.

They may need a job, but not all of them know exactly how the working world works.

Anyway from OP's snotty comments and his pushy mom, I think nephew knows exactly what he's doing and limiting how much these people are involved in his career choices.

Maybe you just know a lot of post-graduate morons.

[Anonymous]

I think the nephew has a sweet gig still living at home & having mommy do everything for him. I don't think he wants a job. I certainly wouldn't forward his resume around again - you'd end up looking stupid yourself. As the DH already does to a certain degree when nephew wouldn't take the first offer.

[Anonymous]

Let your husband decide, if interviewing your nephew bothers him much, he can refuse easily. 28 y.o. guy must be responsible enough , 45 min is not so far if one can get employed at a good company after 2 years of nothing. Anyways, there are always job searching services he could look through ( like http://nelest.com/browse-by-category/business--development/ , I find my current job there ).

[Anonymous]

Say this to your sister--"Have nephew call DH". my bet is it will never happen

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I sort of feel he had his shot and blew it.

This. At 28, he needs to man up and move out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your nephew is too old to have mommy handling his job search.

He is past the teenage years. Time for him to man up and separate from the helicopter.

This is the type of affirmative action some DCUMers love , don't ya know?

It's not affirmative action. It's using connections.