Men: Would you date a woman who did not have a "real job"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most men I know probably would not date a woman who had not at least graduated from college. They want someone who could hold up their end of a conversation. Additionally, in this area,a second professional income means a nicer lifestyle. They want their wives to be accomplished, just slightly less so than themselves.

Also, most people I know have graduate degrees, and expect their children to at least become college graduates. They would assume that a woman without s college degree would either not encourage their kids to do well in school, would not be able to help with homework or would not expose the kids to museums, music etc. They would probably also worry that their kids with such a woman would not be academic.

Perhaps true in the DC area.

Education levels are much lower in the rest of the country. But I guess it's all relative.

Women seem to have trouble being with a man who is not on "her level" (or higher). Men don't need a woman to be on his level. I think this sexual selection dynamic is a major factor in the gender pay gap. Men have higher incomes because women literally want them to have higher incomes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Men do not care. I drifted after college and worked for years as a waitress and bartender: dated an architect, a policy analyst, a fed, and an attorney. I supported myself and was cute, funny, fun, and smart - I really think that's all men care about.

Which one married you?

[Anonymous]

OP, stop being lazy.
Go to school get a degree or learn a trade.
Don't make a man your plan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you think men have a problem with a woman having the jobs you described, then you REALLY don't understand men.

I don't think you do either. Some men absolutely do.

OP, it depends on the particular guy you are interested in.

Some men do, the majority don't . I believe pp is very much aware of this .

Wouldn't say the majority either. I guess it depends on your age and cultural background too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you think men have a problem with a woman having the jobs you described, then you REALLY don't understand men.

+1.

- Man (BigLaw Partner)

[Anonymous]

I'm a nanny. My husband earns 6 figures. All he cares about is that I make a reasonable effort to look good, I'm kind to him and that I have got sex with him. That's all it takes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a nanny. My husband earns 6 figures. All he cares about is that I make a reasonable effort to look good, I'm kind to him and that I have got sex with him. That's all it takes.

*hot

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men do not care. I drifted after college and worked for years as a waitress and bartender: dated an architect, a policy analyst, a fed, and an attorney. I supported myself and was cute, funny, fun, and smart - I really think that's all men care about.

Which one married you?

You mean which one did I marry?

The fed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most men I know probably would not date a woman who had not at least graduated from college. They want someone who could hold up their end of a conversation. Additionally, in this area,a second professional income means a nicer lifestyle. They want their wives to be accomplished, just slightly less so than themselves.

Also, most people I know have graduate degrees, and expect their children to at least become college graduates. They would assume that a woman without s college degree would either not encourage their kids to do well in school, would not be able to help with homework or would not expose the kids to museums, music etc. They would probably also worry that their kids with such a woman would not be academic.

I don't think most people you know are a good representation of society. For someone who went to college, your logic is flawed. Those assumptions are ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

I am curious what is a "real job" for either a man or a woman. I would say any job that allows you to earn a living and be independent and support yourself is a "real job."

[Anonymous]

Married 20 years. SAHM now, but met my now-husband when we were both between jobs; I was temping at local law firms as a receptionist and he was employed but awaiting his completion of a background check for a fed contractor.

I eventually got hired in a permanent position, but when we were dating, I was a lowly temp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most men I know probably would not date a woman who had not at least graduated from college. They want someone who could hold up their end of a conversation. Additionally, in this area,a second professional income means a nicer lifestyle. They want their wives to be accomplished, just slightly less so than themselves.

Also, most people I know have graduate degrees, and expect their children to at least become college graduates. They would assume that a woman without s college degree would either not encourage their kids to do well in school, would not be able to help with homework or would not expose the kids to museums, music etc. They would probably also worry that their kids with such a woman would not be academic.

I don't think most people you know are a good representation of society. For someone who went to college, your logic is flawed. Those assumptions are ridiculous.

Well, I'm a bartender, without a college degree, and I can assure you that I encourage my kids to do well in school, take them to museums, and certainly can hold up my end of an "academic" discussion. In fact, I might say I encourage it MORE, because I know how hard it is to live without one, especially in this area.
Getting a bachelor's degree does not prove that you are smart.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you think men have a problem with a woman having the jobs you described, then you REALLY don't understand men.

+1.

- Man (BigLaw Partner)

Do you actually know anyone in BigLaw who married a waitress? I guess I agree with this in theory, but every high achieving man I know married a well-educated woman. The only exceptions I can think of are people in my parents generation (55 and older), and people who met as teenagers and kind of mapped out their lives together where she supported him through law school/medical school with one of the above jobs and the intent that she would SAH when he finished.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most men I know probably would not date a woman who had not at least graduated from college. They want someone who could hold up their end of a conversation. Additionally, in this area,a second professional income means a nicer lifestyle. They want their wives to be accomplished, just slightly less so than themselves.

Also, most people I know have graduate degrees, and expect their children to at least become college graduates. They would assume that a woman without s college degree would either not encourage their kids to do well in school, would not be able to help with homework or would not expose the kids to museums, music etc. They would probably also worry that their kids with such a woman would not be academic.

Perhaps true in the DC area.

Education levels are much lower in the rest of the country. But I guess it's all relative.

Women seem to have trouble being with a man who is not on "her level" (or higher). Men don't need a woman to be on his level. I think this sexual selection dynamic is a major factor in the gender pay gap. Men have higher incomes because women literally want them to have higher incomes.

Speak for yourself, sister.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most men I know probably would not date a woman who had not at least graduated from college. They want someone who could hold up their end of a conversation. Additionally, in this area,a second professional income means a nicer lifestyle. They want their wives to be accomplished, just slightly less so than themselves.

Also, most people I know have graduate degrees, and expect their children to at least become college graduates. They would assume that a woman without s college degree would either not encourage their kids to do well in school, would not be able to help with homework or would not expose the kids to museums, music etc. They would probably also worry that their kids with such a woman would not be academic.

I don't think most people you know are a good representation of society. For someone who went to college, your logic is flawed. Those assumptions are ridiculous.

Well, I'm a bartender, without a college degree, and I can assure you that I encourage my kids to do well in school, take them to museums, and certainly can hold up my end of an "academic" discussion. In fact, I might say I encourage it MORE, because I know how hard it is to live without one, especially in this area.
Getting a bachelor's degree does not prove that you are smart.

I don't know. I can think of quite a few people who did not do this, particularly with their girls. The girls got bachelors degrees because everyone gets bachelors degrees, but did not really know how to study or how to get a "real" job.
These parents were more like the nanny and her husband above, and believe that a woman's main role is to be kind, look good, and keep the house/kids under control. Unfortunately, that isn't PC in upper middle class society, so they didn't teach their daughters how to do that and find a rich husband either. So, now the girls are kind of in limbo.