Hiring a cleaning lady and not telling husband?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
"This is situation has GOT to be resolved soon because the house is unlivable. You have 3 days to think about how to divide up the cleaning, and then I hire a house-cleaner. Thanks."

If you talk to a man like that all he will hear is "drama queen". You better rephrase that

OMG, his poor feels. He'll be fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP role reversal here my ex wife on the phone while I clean the house. Her conversation ends when I get done cleaning go figure.
Im OCD about cleaning I clean the same areas she just cleaned ( I don't do it when she's present). To me it's not clean unless I did it.

Why do you want her clean if you are just going to clean it anyway?

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks !

Does a new cleaning person usually visit first to give an estimate ? I can understand. Episode of Hoarders or someone who is relatively clean.

[Anonymous]

This is my dream. Be my hero and just do it OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
"This is situation has GOT to be resolved soon because the house is unlivable. You have 3 days to think about how to divide up the cleaning, and then I hire a house-cleaner. Thanks."

If you talk to a man like that all he will hear is "drama queen". You better rephrase that

OMG, his poor feels. He'll be fine.

Then you will complain some more about your husband not helping, amirite?

All your feelings are emergency situations and his should be brushed aside., amirite?

[Anonymous]

Yes, they usually give an estimate before they start. My husband and I jointly decided to hire a cleaner because it is cheaper than a divorce

[Anonymous]

Well, I have the bigger w2, so I do what I want within financial reason. No way in hell would I sneak around. Please.

[Anonymous]

Just hire the cleaning service. But remember, cleaning a house is not tidying or organizing a house. Maybe you'd be happier with a housekeeper? Those actually pick up after your husband, or kids if they have bad habits too (and you don't care to change them).

[Anonymous]

Unless you yourself are an amazing cleaner, its not really possible to hide it. I have hired a cleaning person a few times just before my husband got back from work travel and things had really gone to seed, with the intention of not mentioning it, and he could tell right away that a professional had been there (bathroom surfaces truly scrubbed, etc).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you clean up before the cleaner comes? This is what I don't get. If I were to hire somebody, I'll leave the cleaning to her, totally, with clear written instructions.

I have to agree. If you have to clean before they come, then why hire them? Let them do it... I am sure they have seen it all.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't want to intentionally be deceitful because the long term effect is that it can erode trust issues within your marriage.

Discuss the issue again, letting him know that his plan is not working since he is not following through and that you will be going forward with hiring someone to clean the house.

Tell him you are just too tired of having a dirty home.