WWYD? Saw crying k student being picked up and moved to classroom by teacher

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you really know these parents, I would certainly mention to them that their child seemed to have a really rough day at school and they should try and understand why she was so upset at the singalong.
To be mad at a K teacher because she moved the kid away from the situation that was upsetting her (and away from all the other kids who were behving and trying to have a good experience) is something I just don't understand.
You really want the K teacher to do breathing exercises (or other "social emotional exercise" whatever the heck that even means) with this kid smack in the middle of the singalong? I don't think that would have been very effective anyway.

A few clarifications, this is a private school. There are 11 students and 2 teachers. It prides itself on a strong social-emotional foundation based on the Responsive Classroom curriculum. This was right after school started, not at the sing along, happening right outside the classroom.

I understand what many are saying in that teachers need to be able to get their classroom on track for the sake of the other students. However, I do think other tactics could have been used other than forcibly carrying a girl who was resisting. All in all, I appreciate the feedback but I do stand by my gut.

Thank you to all who replied.

-OP

It is called a tantrum. The girl wanted to control the situation, she was unable so she had a tantrum which meant of couse she would resist.. Had the teacher left her in the hallway you would be upset that she was left unattended. And the girl would learn thgat tantrums at school get me ewhat I want.

[Anonymous]

One clown should not be allowed to halt the circus.

I don't teach ES, but four separate times in my public school teaching career, my students and I have been forced to evacuate a classroom because a disruptive student refused to leave and no adult was able to make the student exit. There is a special frustration in losing instructional time for 29 students as you wander the halls looking for an empty classroom while admin and security try to cajole one child into leaving. I know I am not the only teacher this has happened to. As recently as this school year, my students warned me to never ask "Larlo" to take his binder off the desk. They said that last year, they all had to leave a classroom because he trashed it after a teacher told him to place his binder on a window shelf during a test.

[Anonymous]

OP, mom of a child with anxiety issues here.

Do you personally know what the plan is for when the girl is having a problem? Are you aware that sometimes yes, you do need to say "Enough, you're ok.. let's go."?

Unless you know with 100% certainty that this was not handled properly with this child.. mind your own business.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for posting, OP. I, too, concur with you that this was inappropriate. While raising my niece, I noted that she experienced certain things in the school system that made me raise an eyebrow and would have seen me removing her from that setting if I'd had the choice at the time. I'm a bit surprised to see that similar things are still accepted practice.

This thread was an interesting and eye-opening discussion that confirms my decision to homeschool once my child reaches the appropriate age. I appreciate the chance to read everyone's thoughts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for posting, OP. I, too, concur with you that this was inappropriate. While raising my niece, I noted that she experienced certain things in the school system that made me raise an eyebrow and would have seen me removing her from that setting if I'd had the choice at the time. I'm a bit surprised to see that similar things are still accepted practice.

This thread was an interesting and eye-opening discussion that confirms my decision to homeschool once my child reaches the appropriate age. I appreciate the chance to read everyone's thoughts.

Amen. I've been lurking silently here and your post PP has been the most sensible so far. I'm a bit shocked that so many people think it's okay to physically lift a 5-6yo against their will. It's not.

[Anonymous]

OP, if you "report" this, people will see you as the "crazy mom": you know that, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for posting, OP. I, too, concur with you that this was inappropriate. While raising my niece, I noted that she experienced certain things in the school system that made me raise an eyebrow and would have seen me removing her from that setting if I'd had the choice at the time. I'm a bit surprised to see that similar things are still accepted practice.

This thread was an interesting and eye-opening discussion that confirms my decision to homeschool once my child reaches the appropriate age. I appreciate the chance to read everyone's thoughts.

Amen. I've been lurking silently here and your post PP has been the most sensible so far. I'm a bit shocked that so many people think it's okay to physically lift a 5-6yo against their will. It's not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for posting, OP. I, too, concur with you that this was inappropriate. While raising my niece, I noted that she experienced certain things in the school system that made me raise an eyebrow and would have seen me removing her from that setting if I'd had the choice at the time. I'm a bit surprised to see that similar things are still accepted practice.

This thread was an interesting and eye-opening discussion that confirms my decision to homeschool once my child reaches the appropriate age. I appreciate the chance to read everyone's thoughts.

Amen. I've been lurking silently here and your post PP has been the most sensible so far. I'm a bit shocked that so many people think it's okay to physically lift a 5-6yo against their will. It's not.

Picking up a kid throwing a fit should be allowed. You people are nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is the issue here?

Plus 1!!!

Signed,
a preschool teacher who has done the same thing many times...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She basically carried her, crying, back into the classroom. She's my son's best friend, very shy and anxious. She was crying because our school was having a sing a long and didn't want to sing. Barely any social-emotional tools used during the 5 minutes spent trying to calm the child. After five minutes she just said "come on, back inside" picked up the crying child and walked into the classroom with her. Five minutes later the same girl came back outside with the other teacher, crying, but finally calmed down 5 minutes later as the teacher used breathing exercises to calm her. Should I be reporting this to someone? Telling her parents? My gut says yes but I'm a first time elementary parent so maybe this is normal? Thanks for your two cents.

No. There's nothing to report and for all you know, the parent and teacher have discussed this. You cease being a volunteer once you stop letting the school do the teaching.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"I want to complain/feel superior, so I'm going to pretend to ask a question even though I don't care about your answers."

Its the word "report" that got me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for posting, OP. I, too, concur with you that this was inappropriate. While raising my niece, I noted that she experienced certain things in the school system that made me raise an eyebrow and would have seen me removing her from that setting if I'd had the choice at the time. I'm a bit surprised to see that similar things are still accepted practice.

This thread was an interesting and eye-opening discussion that confirms my decision to homeschool once my child reaches the appropriate age. I appreciate the chance to read everyone's thoughts.

I'm glad you are choosing to homeschool. The rest of us reasonable parents do not want to have to deal with overzealous parents like you.

[Anonymous]

Just read this thread OP, and I've got a sneaking suspicion that one or two grumpy people are driving the negative/non-helpful posts. So take it all with a grain.

Snark aside, your concern of whether a teacher's disciplinary action was appropriate is a real/valid one. However, as outsiders it is hard for us to really know if the action of the teacher falls within "normal" or was clearly out of bounds. As with all disciplinary action, people, place, timing and background info. all play a vital part.

As an educator in a nearby public school system, we are legally disallowed at the school level to physically restrain a child. I would interpret this as picking up a child against their will and moving them to a different spot as your teacher did.

In fact, in VA there are some serious discussion around physical discipline tactics as nation-wide they have led to 20 child deaths in 2012 alone.

http://www.propublica.org/article/virginia-passes-bill-to-rein-in-restraints-of-school-kids

However, and sadly, most states do not have laws restricting teachers from using force (sometimes extreme) to subdue a child. And private schools would have to create their own policies surrounding this issue so there is an added wrinkle for your situation.

My advice? Give yourself a night's sleep to see if your gut still says it was inappropriate behavior. If yes, I would speak to your director about the policies in place about physically touching a child at your school. If the teacher was clearly breaking these rules, report it on the spot. If not, hold tight and continue observing her interactions.

Finally, thank you for looking out for our community of learners. Yes, teachers have it tough at times but no one deserves to be physically intimidated for their feelings. And teachers are not saints as some on this thread may believe. They make mistakes too and must be called to tasked for everyone's benefit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for posting, OP. I, too, concur with you that this was inappropriate. While raising my niece, I noted that she experienced certain things in the school system that made me raise an eyebrow and would have seen me removing her from that setting if I'd had the choice at the time. I'm a bit surprised to see that similar things are still accepted practice.

This thread was an interesting and eye-opening discussion that confirms my decision to homeschool once my child reaches the appropriate age. I appreciate the chance to read everyone's thoughts.

Amen. I've been lurking silently here and your post PP has been the most sensible so far. I'm a bit shocked that so many people think it's okay to physically lift a 5-6yo against their will. It's not.

Picking up a kid throwing a fit should be allowed. You people are nuts.

Former teacher here. It is allowed if the kid is endangering himself/others/the teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One clown should not be allowed to halt the circus.

I don't teach ES, but four separate times in my public school teaching career, my students and I have been forced to evacuate a classroom because a disruptive student refused to leave and no adult was able to make the student exit. There is a special frustration in losing instructional time for 29 students as you wander the halls looking for an empty classroom while admin and security try to cajole one child into leaving. I know I am not the only teacher this has happened to. As recently as this school year, my students warned me to never ask "Larlo" to take his binder off the desk. They said that last year, they all had to leave a classroom because he trashed it after a teacher told him to place his binder on a window shelf during a test.

I'm sorry this has happened, but every year in this country, hundreds of people die because someone moved or restrained them.

Restraining people, and that includes picking them up and moving them, is dangerous. It's less dangerous with a Kindergartener, but it's still not something that should happen in schools unless there's truly no other choice.