SIL is very ostentatious

[Anonymous]

Just ask her lots of questions. Let her talk and talk and talk. Feign interest if you must.

[Anonymous]

OP is obviously jealous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you have a chip on your shoulder OP. I enjoy traveling, but haven't ever been to Asia and Africa. I really love to listen to my friends journeys across Cambodia and Vietnam. I'm not jealous and I don't think they're bragging. It's just what people talk about. Why not listen to her trips if that's what she enjoys doing? I surely listen about people's kids all day and don't have any.

I grew up much wealthier than my inlaws and it's extremely hard to find common ground. I feel like everything is off limits to talk about. Everything we do is completely different and somehow more privileged than them. Even something as simple as getting new pots for my kitchen is excessive.

You may have a way of describing things that is off putting. Are you like "Oh I got this copper and gold plated 800 stock pot" or "my nonstick wore out again. I got a new one from Costco" . Also most people don't talk about cookware acquisitions as though they are a big deal.

[Anonymous]

Bring a lot of magazines. Your SIL sounds a lot like my sister. I have pretty much given up the idea of having a real relationship with her, but we can sit in the same room and comment on US Weekly together.

[Anonymous]

Accept her for who she is a move on? You can enjoy someones company without being judgmental.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP is obviously jealous.

Maybe, maybe not. But OP does not seem to like her SIL, and the problem seems to be that OP wants to be liked. She sees herself as someone everyone likes, and SIL is ruining it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
But she's not a bad person, right? So just go with the flow.

Not the typical psycho interfering SIL thread, so consider yourself lucky and don't expect a best friend, but feel relieved that you haven't found an arch enemy, either. For DCUM, it's a comparative win!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look the best thing for everyone is just be who you are. I doubt she is expecting you to be rich. Remember that she is a SIL and I doubt she is looking for a friend. Try to just be a SIL. Be polite and not have expectations. SIL's make notoriously lousy potential friends. I'm not wealthy but my husbands income rose dramatically when we were younger and the envy and greed from others was horrible. We ended up losing a great friend because she just couldn't stand that our house was bigger than hers. My family came out of the woodwork with their hands open. Both of these experiences have left us reluctant to be open or trusting. Your SIL may have walls built up internally to prevent an easy friendship so try too hard or it may be misinterpreted as needy or greedy.

Interesting and hugs to you