What would you do? The opposite of redshirting

[Anonymous]

A child psychologist who's familiar with the school system might be a good resource to speak with to see what options you have. I'm another late October birthday who ended up in K a year early because I started preschool in MD when the cutoff was Dec 31 and moved to rural PA where the cutoff was Sept 1. My parents didn't want me to end up skipping a grade so they had me tested and approved for entry into K early for the PA school district.

I know that girls are different than boys, but I also was smaller than everyone in my class and still ended up 1st in the class, top tier university, etc etc. I never minded being the youngest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't answer your question but wanted to offer my experience as the parent of an advanced/gifted october birthday boy.....

Take it for what it is worth but do not push your kid ahead. My son is in the grade he should be and is one of the oldest in his class. We don't regret it for one minute. I'll spare the details and I know every kid is different but this is our experience. You can't learn maturity and how to deal well with other kids from a book. Sure, school has been boring for him most times but he is way happier than if we had pushed him ahead.

Maybe starting earlier would have given him more experience than starting him on time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A child psychologist who's familiar with the school system might be a good resource to speak with to see what options you have. I'm another late October birthday who ended up in K a year early because I started preschool in MD when the cutoff was Dec 31 and moved to rural PA where the cutoff was Sept 1. My parents didn't want me to end up skipping a grade so they had me tested and approved for entry into K early for the PA school district.

I know that girls are different than boys, but I also was smaller than everyone in my class and still ended up 1st in the class, top tier university, etc etc. I never minded being the youngest.

This seems to be the case a lot of the time. I saw a NYT article about this recently and it said the majority of kids who start early end up at the top of their class.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks, everyone, for such great contributions. Lots of food for thought.

I don't want to make an impression that I am convinced he should go to first grade ahead of schedule. I will absolutely put him in kindergarten again if that's where he belongs after he completes his private K program. I simply want to know that IF he matures enough during that year, that there IS an option for him to go to first grade based on evaluations of academics and social skills.

To the posters who were concerned about being the smallest kid in class: it just so happens that he is VERY tall for his age so that is not a concern.

To someone who asked why he was put in the pre-K class: his preschool has two tracks - preschool and pre-K. He completed the preschool year and was obviously ready to transition to pre-K (not to mention way bigger than most of the preschool kids). It would have made zero sense to keep him in preschool track for another year.

His preschool is very good and offers a good mix of academics and play. But I do not want him to repeat their pre-K year again; it has nothing to do with the school, I just think that he doesn't need another year of the same.

The private K program I am considering is more structured but offers lots of enrichment activities, play time, two recesses a day, music etc. in addition to academics. It is also an immersion language school, one of the few in this area, so would give us a great opportunity to cement his grasp of his heritage language.

I may be a little biased because I was the youngest kid in my class too (late August bday) and ended up as not only the top student but also the tallest in class.

For those of you who say it can be done: is it, then, to the discretion of the principal of his base school? Or can you demand that he be evaluated for 1st grade placement? Meaning, can the principal decline to even evaluate him out of, well, principle?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A child psychologist who's familiar with the school system might be a good resource to speak with to see what options you have. I'm another late October birthday who ended up in K a year early because I started preschool in MD when the cutoff was Dec 31 and moved to rural PA where the cutoff was Sept 1. My parents didn't want me to end up skipping a grade so they had me tested and approved for entry into K early for the PA school district.

I know that girls are different than boys, but I also was smaller than everyone in my class and still ended up 1st in the class, top tier university, etc etc. I never minded being the youngest.

This seems to be the case a lot of the time. I saw a NYT article about this recently and it said the majority of kids who start early end up at the top of their class.

But of course that's the case. Kids who start early are very bright. That's why they're starting early.

There is more to life than ending up at the top of your class. The girl at the top of my high school class was extremely awkward and had no friends. I have no idea how old she was, for what it's worth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents did this with me. I graduated valedictorian, got a full merit scholarship to undergrad and a full ride plus stipend to grad school. Plus, I was younger than almost everyone in college and so did not take part in the "bar scene" and was a straight arrow.

I'm now in an executive role at my full-time job and have started a successful business that's on track to replace my regular career within 2-3 years.

Yes, I'm certain there are children for whom starting early is a bad idea, but the research supports starting as early as a child can -- if you look at the research into red-shirting, the older children initially have an advantage, but it deteriorates around middle school. Ironically, because they are academically bored and sexually more mature than their peers, they are the ones who tend to get into social trouble rather than younger peers (which one of the PPs claimed, anecdotally, was likely to happen -- the research doesn't bear that out).

My son is a late fall birthday and I also hope to send him early if circumstances allow.

Are you a woman? If so, not a good comparison. Boys are different the whole way through. Their maturity, social stress points, and social pecking order norms are very different than girls.

I'm not the PP, but I can already think of three similar instances off the top of my head: My brother, born late Nov, did the same thing. Was valedictorian, ivy league undergrad, med school, and is now a surgeon with an amazing group of friends (including this just to show social adjustment). My husband and his sister both have Oct bdays, both went to ivy leagues, and are well adjusted, happy adults.

That said, IMO, it really comes down to your child and his level of maturity. Just thought I'd also point out that short attention spans are often an indicator of high intelligence!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, yes, you can put him in private K and then have him assessed in the spring for placement in first. Principal discretion. FCPS can and does do this. State law only mandates 5 by 9/30 for K. There is no age restriction for first.

I think you are doing the right thing to meet his needs now and re-evaluate in the spring and summer. You can always enroll him in FCPS Kindergarten in the fall even if you have him assessed and they allow placement into first.

Many people on DCUM are automatically pro-red shirting for really bad reasons and many of those kids will get into trouble in their older years and will feel odd that they were held back. I have kids in MS and they know who is a year older. In reality, it is very kid-specific. Yes, we can't predict the future. Just use your best judgment and don't be swayed by the knee jerk redshirters.

I skipped K, was a year younger than everyone else and absolutely loved it! I was academically and socially successful. My confidence was boosted by how well I did in school despite being a year younger.

How is thinking that kids should be with their same-age peers according to the school cutoff "pro redshirting" ???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks, everyone, for such great contributions. Lots of food for thought.

I don't want to make an impression that I am convinced he should go to first grade ahead of schedule. I will absolutely put him in kindergarten again if that's where he belongs after he completes his private K program. I simply want to know that IF he matures enough during that year, that there IS an option for him to go to first grade based on evaluations of academics and social skills.

To the posters who were concerned about being the smallest kid in class: it just so happens that he is VERY tall for his age so that is not a concern.

To someone who asked why he was put in the pre-K class: his preschool has two tracks - preschool and pre-K. He completed the preschool year and was obviously ready to transition to pre-K (not to mention way bigger than most of the preschool kids). It would have made zero sense to keep him in preschool track for another year.

His preschool is very good and offers a good mix of academics and play. But I do not want him to repeat their pre-K year again; it has nothing to do with the school, I just think that he doesn't need another year of the same.

The private K program I am considering is more structured but offers lots of enrichment activities, play time, two recesses a day, music etc. in addition to academics. It is also an immersion language school, one of the few in this area, so would give us a great opportunity to cement his grasp of his heritage language.

I may be a little biased because I was the youngest kid in my class too (late August bday) and ended up as not only the top student but also the tallest in class.

For those of you who say it can be done: is it, then, to the discretion of the principal of his base school? Or can you demand that he be evaluated for 1st grade placement? Meaning, can the principal decline to even evaluate him out of, well, principle?

How strange. Most preschools I've toured have it grouped by age and in accordance with the FCPS calendar. So a twos class, a threes class, a fours class, and maybe a pre-K for kids being red shirted. I've never seen a preschool that only had two classes, "generic preschool" and "pre-K". Weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A child psychologist who's familiar with the school system might be a good resource to speak with to see what options you have. I'm another late October birthday who ended up in K a year early because I started preschool in MD when the cutoff was Dec 31 and moved to rural PA where the cutoff was Sept 1. My parents didn't want me to end up skipping a grade so they had me tested and approved for entry into K early for the PA school district.

I know that girls are different than boys, but I also was smaller than everyone in my class and still ended up 1st in the class, top tier university, etc etc. I never minded being the youngest.

This seems to be the case a lot of the time. I saw a NYT article about this recently and it said the majority of kids who start early end up at the top of their class.

Perhaps because they have no friends, they devote their time to studying.

[Anonymous]

I dont know why everyone is so against this. This could be a huge advantage later in life. My DH finished BS by 20 and get a headstart on a career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A child psychologist who's familiar with the school system might be a good resource to speak with to see what options you have. I'm another late October birthday who ended up in K a year early because I started preschool in MD when the cutoff was Dec 31 and moved to rural PA where the cutoff was Sept 1. My parents didn't want me to end up skipping a grade so they had me tested and approved for entry into K early for the PA school district.

I know that girls are different than boys, but I also was smaller than everyone in my class and still ended up 1st in the class, top tier university, etc etc. I never minded being the youngest.

This seems to be the case a lot of the time. I saw a NYT article about this recently and it said the majority of kids who start early end up at the top of their class.

Perhaps because they have no friends, they devote their time to studying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, yes, you can put him in private K and then have him assessed in the spring for placement in first. Principal discretion. FCPS can and does do this. State law only mandates 5 by 9/30 for K. There is no age restriction for first.

I think you are doing the right thing to meet his needs now and re-evaluate in the spring and summer. You can always enroll him in FCPS Kindergarten in the fall even if you have him assessed and they allow placement into first.

Many people on DCUM are automatically pro-red shirting for really bad reasons and many of those kids will get into trouble in their older years and will feel odd that they were held back. I have kids in MS and they know who is a year older. In reality, it is very kid-specific. Yes, we can't predict the future. Just use your best judgment and don't be swayed by the knee jerk redshirters.

I skipped K, was a year younger than everyone else and absolutely loved it! I was academically and socially successful. My confidence was boosted by how well I did in school despite being a year younger.

How is thinking that kids should be with their same-age peers according to the school cutoff "pro redshirting" ???

This. The debate in this thread is staying with your allotted age group or going early. We're not even talking about redshirting. Someone in the allotted age group will be the oldest and the youngest, clearly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I dont know why everyone is so against this. This could be a huge advantage later in life. My DH finished BS by 20 and get a headstart on a career.

Because there is more to life than being at the top of your class or getting a jumpstart on your career (why is that anyone's goal exactly?).

My freshman year roommate in college had skipped a year and was 16 when we got to college. She was clearly bright but she struggled socially. Honestly, she had zero social skills and was a bit of an outcast. I can't even imagine what is was like for her. Not fun.

And of course someone will say their cousin Bob went to college at 12 and was the captain of the football team and dated tons of girls and was the president of his fraternity.

I don't know. It seems logical that, on average, younger kids will be less mature. And that will have implications, on average. And some kids will be fine.

[Anonymous]

Because there is more to life than being at the top of your class or getting a jumpstart on your career (why is that anyone's goal exactly?).

My freshman year roommate in college had skipped a year and was 16 when we got to college. She was clearly bright but she struggled socially. Honestly, she had zero social skills and was a bit of an outcast. I can't even imagine what is was like for her. Not fun.

And of course someone will say their cousin Bob went to college at 12 and was the captain of the football team and dated tons of girls and was the president of his fraternity.

I don't know. It seems logical that, on average, younger kids will be less mature. And that will have implications, on average. And some kids will be fine.

Good post. There was a girl on my freshman dorm floor who was exactly like this---16 and very much an outcast socially. But, hey, it doesn't have to be this way and I'm sure there are some who are socially mature much younger than others. This one was not. So everyone has to use the best information they have and make their own decision.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Because there is more to life than being at the top of your class or getting a jumpstart on your career (why is that anyone's goal exactly?).

My freshman year roommate in college had skipped a year and was 16 when we got to college. She was clearly bright but she struggled socially. Honestly, she had zero social skills and was a bit of an outcast. I can't even imagine what is was like for her. Not fun.

And of course someone will say their cousin Bob went to college at 12 and was the captain of the football team and dated tons of girls and was the president of his fraternity.

I don't know. It seems logical that, on average, younger kids will be less mature. And that will have implications, on average. And some kids will be fine.

Good post. There was a girl on my freshman dorm floor who was exactly like this---16 and very much an outcast socially. But, hey, it doesn't have to be this way and I'm sure there are some who are socially mature much younger than others. This one was not. So everyone has to use the best information they have and make their own decision.

+100. I've known a few people who skipped a grade or more and not a single one had a normal social life. Most had tiger parents (speaking of parenting style, not ethnicity) who focused on academic achievement above all else. Please don't do this to your child.

And as for how it fits with redshirting, there is a reason Maryland schools only allow early admittance to kids born in September and then, only after they pass a readiness test. If you know redshirting is the norm in your school, why would you want to move your child a grade ahead?