In this situation, do you think two parties are necessary?

[Anonymous]

Parties for children should be about the children. If the grandparents are there...that's enough. If cousins can make it, great. But parties are way too big and overdone now days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's ridiculous. You have the party at your house or a location nearby. Don't get the two family-two party tradition started or you will be expected to do it every year.

Agree completely. Don't start something you don't want to keep doing for years, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your in laws are rude

I was going to say "assholes," but your version is more polite. Yes, OP, they are rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Parties for children should be about the children. If the grandparents are there...that's enough. If cousins can make it, great. But parties are way too big and overdone now days.

Well that's why I invite DH's family as well as mine, there's a lot of kids in both families. It's at a park so I thought it would be nice for all her cousins that DD's crazy about could be there to celebrate with her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's ridiculous. You have the party at your house or a location nearby. Don't get the two family-two party tradition started or you will be expected to do it every year.

Agree completely. Don't start something you don't want to keep doing for years, OP.

I told him that and he said if that's what it takes to get his family to come then so be it.

[Anonymous]

Not necessary, though we will sometimes do a little thing at my parents house later (just cupcakes next time we are there or whatever.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's ridiculous. You have the party at your house or a location nearby. Don't get the two family-two party tradition started or you will be expected to do it every year.

Agree completely. Don't start something you don't want to keep doing for years, OP.

I told him that and he said if that's what it takes to get his family to come then so be it.

You have my sympathy. How annoying. Let him do all the work.

[Anonymous]

That's crazy. I think a second party is fine if MIL wants to host and it works out for your schedule. But the excuses for not attending yours make no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's crazy. I think a second party is fine if MIL wants to host and it works out for your schedule. But the excuses for not attending yours make no sense.

It really doesn't. We'll be busy Saturday and Sunday and would prefer to relax on Monday before going back to work/school on Tuesday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's crazy. I think a second party is fine if MIL wants to host and it works out for your schedule. But the excuses for not attending yours make no sense.

It really doesn't. We'll be busy Saturday and Sunday and would prefer to relax on Monday before going back to work/school on Tuesday.

So tell MIL that. The problem is your DH, though. He obviously wants this, so you have to decide if this is just one of those things you let go.

Pick your battles.

[Anonymous]

PG County is really big, north to south. If they live in College Park, I'm not that sympathetic. If they live all the way down in like Oxon Hill or something, I'm more sympathetic to them not wanting to battle both the beltway and 270 to go to a really big party where they won't even get to spend that much time with the little one. I don't really see that hardship in having a second family party, particularly when they offer to host.
I have relatives that live 45 minutes away, and honestly I'm not that psyched to spend 1 1/2 in a car to then spend 1 1/2 at Pump It Up on their side of the state with a bunch of kids. Would rather just have a sane lunch together some time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parties for children should be about the children. If the grandparents are there...that's enough. If cousins can make it, great. But parties are way too big and overdone now days.

Well that's why I invite DH's family as well as mine, there's a lot of kids in both families. It's at a park so I thought it would be nice for all her cousins that DD's crazy about could be there to celebrate with her.

I understand...but what I don't understand is why the distance is an issue. Traveling around Maryland can be a pain but I don't think that's the issue here. What are you saving them by having a 2nd party...an hour less of a drive? It seems to me there is more to it than a drive. And I agree with others who have said that to do two parties is setting a bad precedent.

Also...if you stand firm on the one party you might see more agreeing to come.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do they even need to come to the party? There's a party, they were invited. They declined. No reason for another party. That's silly.

When you have a dinner party and people decline, do you plan a second dinner party so they can come?

This would be my reaction too. Unless this is some kind of milestone birthday (quinceanara, sweet 16, etc.) I don't see why there is a need for multiple parties.

[Anonymous]

Sorry OP, have this issue with my in-laws too. My parents and in-laws live around 45min apart. My mom and sister planned/hosted my baby shower in my hometown and my in-laws did NOTHING but complain the entire time about how long it took them to get there. Unfortunately there isn't much between them that would work for a kids party (no parks and what not) so if they want to host a party for DD, they are more than welcome to (assuming we can attend, hahaha). We had a party here locally here and funny enough both sets of parents attended.

OP I would stand your grand, host a party at a location that's fun for your child(ren) and let that be that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's ridiculous. You have the party at your house or a location nearby. Don't get the two family-two party tradition started or you will be expected to do it every year.

Agree completely. Don't start something you don't want to keep doing for years, OP.

I told him that and he said if that's what it takes to get his family to come then so be it.

Great. Tell him you're happy to attend whatever party he and his mother plan. Then don't do one single thing to make the party happen. His family are acting like spoiled children. You're having a party, they could drive there but just don't want to, too bad.