Obsessive Grandparents ( in laws)

[Anonymous]

Red flags! I would not leave your stepdaughter and her grandfather alone. Period. Seriously.

[Anonymous]

Molestation was my first thought as well. I really hope I'm wrong. In any case move as far away as you can.

[Anonymous]

OP, show this to your wife. Unless you are a troll, what you have posted is screaming textbook molestation scenario. Grandfather secretly bringing the child into his bed at night? You don't need to know ANY other detail to know you need to get that child out of the house tonight.

(And apparently you don't have separate quarters if grandfather can huts walk right in, take a child from her bed, and not be heard or noticed by anyone else.)

I really hope you are not real. This poor child. Why in earth would you consent to live there????

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound annoying. Step up and be a parent. I doubt you are paying market rate.

You are an idiot and most likely a obsessive controlling grandparent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you sure the grandfather is not molesting your step daughter?

Are you really, really sure?

I have a feeling OP is suspicious (which is why he wants to set boundaries), but didn't want to express the horrible thought in words. I'd be suspicious too, though it could just be that grandpa is a control-freak. Either way, get out now.

Any intelligent person would be a fool not to be suspicious. The first thing I thought when I read the OP was that the poor little girl is being molested. OP needs to get her away from that grandfather as soon as possible.

She is NOT being molested.. it is just a control issue for him..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, show this to your wife. Unless you are a troll, what you have posted is screaming textbook molestation scenario. Grandfather secretly bringing the child into his bed at night? You don't need to know ANY other detail to know you need to get that child out of the house tonight.

(And apparently you don't have separate quarters if grandfather can huts walk right in, take a child from her bed, and not be heard or noticed by anyone else.)

I really hope you are not real. This poor child. Why in earth would you consent to live there????

Again the child is NOT being molested. that is ridiculous , the issue at hand is a controlling grandparent who wants things done his way. the child has a wonderful relationship with mother. he used to allow my wife to sleep in the same bed until she was 12 and she has never been molested. please stop jumping to conclusions. yes he is doing a lot of strange things but its a culture issue , im not ok with the sleeping even if molestation is not going on ( which it is NOT) ALL THESE THING HE DID WITH MY WIFE. there is a precedent and no sexual acts of any kind were done. again this is about a super control freak grandparent who thinks they have some right to have say in childs life, i have already stated we ARE moving.

as far as state with grandparent laws that is absolute nonsense.. those apply to divorce and parental irresponsibility. Our state has rules grand parents rights to visitation UNCOSTITUTIONAL. i woule LOVE to see the government try to tell me who i can or cant have my child be with lol..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is your fault (and your wife's) for living with them for so long. Apparently these problems have been going on for years. How is bitching going to fix the situation? I think you and your wife should take some parenting classes to prepare yourselves for dealing with your kids once you're on your own. Sounds like you've let a lot of damage be done to stepdaughter. It's not going to be easy to fix, and some professional guidance would be useful.

As for cutting out the grandparents, you may or may not need to. See how things go once they're not the de facto parents.

I completly agree it is OUR fault as well- however in the spirit of transparency i must say i was completely against ALL of these things as soon as i met the SD. ( in my family we are military and very structured) i am NOT her parent and do not get to make unilateral decisions regarding her. My wife ( was raised in this same way- has realized it is incorrect and matured to understand something has to be done. PEOPLE MAKE MISTAKES! ) yes my wife allowed this for a while, however as mentioned i got her to realize this is not a proper way to raise a child.. again MY WIFE'S dad did the SAME THINGS with her.. there was NO MOLESTATION. this is nto a case of ABUSE in any way.. this is a case of two different cultures / parenting styles and the grandparents not realizing they have no say in the raising of our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound annoying. Step up and be a parent. I doubt you are paying market rate.

also you pompous moron, we pay OVER market rate .. the reason we even moved in the same building was to HELP THEM .. so take your soap box and shove it up your a$$.. like i said before you are probably one of these geriatric jerks who thinks they have a say in their grandkids raising. NEWS FLASH ...YOU DONT>

[Anonymous]

You can't know for sure that she isn't being molested because you aren't sleeping in the same bed! This is very fucked up. It does sound like bribes. No really caring person would act like this. I think both you and your wife need counseling because you've both utterly failed as parents, step or otherwise. You need to man up and acknowledge that before you can move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can't know for sure that she isn't being molested because you aren't sleeping in the same bed! This is very fucked up. It does sound like bribes. No really caring person would act like this. I think both you and your wife need counseling because you've both utterly failed as parents, step or otherwise. You need to man up and acknowledge that before you can move on.

\

The only thing that has failed is your brain .
People dont have to live up to YOUR expectations about parenting. The OP Obviously is making a simple point about GP overstepping their bounds. And here you people go on about molestation and counceling? You are probably the type of parent that babies and coddles their child as if they were made of paper. the very type of parent who later on in live ends up having an Adam Lanza child. So to me it seems like the failure in life is YOU and your flawed ideals.

[Anonymous]

Grow up and move out. Btw, stop differentiating between "your daughter" and "your stepdaughter". If you are going to parent then parent them both,

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can't know for sure that she isn't being molested because you aren't sleeping in the same bed! This is very fucked up. It does sound like bribes. No really caring person would act like this. I think both you and your wife need counseling because you've both utterly failed as parents, step or otherwise. You need to man up and acknowledge that before you can move on.

\

The only thing that has failed is your brain .
People dont have to live up to YOUR expectations about parenting. The OP Obviously is making a simple point about GP overstepping their bounds. And here you people go on about molestation and counceling? You are probably the type of parent that babies and coddles their child as if they were made of paper. the very type of parent who later on in live ends up having an Adam Lanza child. So to me it seems like the failure in life is YOU and your flawed ideals.

This is the OP sockpuppeting...same bad grammar, spelling, capital letters. Ugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Grow up and move out. Btw, stop differentiating between "your daughter" and "your stepdaughter". If you are going to parent then parent them both,

+1000. You cannot underestimate the trouble being created by setting up a difference between your biological child and your stepchild. You are leaving SD to the wolves and vowing grandpa won 't touch your own child.

You have big, big problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can't know for sure that she isn't being molested because you aren't sleeping in the same bed! This is very fucked up. It does sound like bribes. No really caring person would act like this. I think both you and your wife need counseling because you've both utterly failed as parents, step or otherwise. You need to man up and acknowledge that before you can move on.

\

The only thing that has failed is your brain .
People dont have to live up to YOUR expectations about parenting. The OP Obviously is making a simple point about GP overstepping their bounds. And here you people go on about molestation and counceling? You are probably the type of parent that babies and coddles their child as if they were made of paper. the very type of parent who later on in live ends up having an Adam Lanza child. So to me it seems like the failure in life is YOU and your flawed ideals.

If you're going to blatantly sockpuppet, at least make an effort to avoid your very obvious writing style.

[Anonymous]

You and your wife are both fucking morons, OP. It's beyond obvious that this child is being molested right under your nose. WHAT GROWN MAN TAKES A CHILD OUT OF HER BED AND BRINGS HER INTO BED WITH HIM? A 6 YEAR OLD CHILD?

Wake up. My god. If you were standing in front of me I would punch you in the face.