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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is your fault (and your wife's) for living with them for so long. Apparently these problems have been going on for years. How is bitching going to fix the situation? I think you and your wife should take some parenting classes to prepare yourselves for dealing with your kids once you're on your own. Sounds like you've let a lot of damage be done to stepdaughter. It's not going to be easy to fix, and some professional guidance would be useful.

As for cutting out the grandparents, you may or may not need to. See how things go once they're not the de facto parents. [/quote]
I completly agree it is OUR fault as well- however in the spirit of transparency i must say i was completely against ALL of these things as soon as i met the SD. ( in my family we are military and very structured)  i am NOT her parent and do not get to make unilateral decisions regarding her.  My wife ( was raised in this same way- has realized it is incorrect and matured to understand something has to be done. PEOPLE MAKE MISTAKES! ) yes my wife allowed this for a while, however as mentioned i got her to realize this is not a proper way to raise a child.. again MY WIFE'S dad did the SAME THINGS with her.. there was NO MOLESTATION.  this is nto a case of ABUSE in any way.. this is a case of two different cultures / parenting styles and the grandparents not realizing they have no say in the raising of our kids.  [/quote]

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