Neighbor goes after young moms

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'm there about once per week. I don't really see the neighbor, who lives 2-3 doors down.

The kids are no where NEAR the neighbor. In fact, the kids are ONLY on their own property. This is why it is puzzling that the neighbor (age 60ish) is so hell bent on "going after" (don't know what else to call it) the younger (ages 25-45) moms. The only thing we can surmise is that she is mentally "off", combined with too much time on her hands. Or perhaps, someone laid into her (or worse) when she was that age with younger kids, and she has an ax to grind. Maybe her kids were taken away from her way back when?

But the kids are definitely on their own property, never anyone else's.

Should my friend get together with the other neighbors, with whom this woman finds imagined fault, and tell her to back off or else? Or just do the "or else" without warning? I don't know what my friend has in mind, off hand. But I know I would not want to cross her, myself.

Your "friend" whom you visit about once per week, needs to tell the woman to button it.

I don't understand why you are so invested in something that involves a friend you visit with once/week. You don't see the neighbor. Have you heard her yelling? Do you know for a fact that kids are never NEAR the neighbor, and ONLY on their own property... even when you aren't visiting?

OR... this could be your neighborhood, and there's far more to the story. Just guessing.

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'm there about once per week. I don't really see the neighbor, who lives 2-3 doors down.

The kids are no where NEAR the neighbor. In fact, the kids are ONLY on their own property. This is why it is puzzling that the neighbor (age 60ish) is so hell bent on "going after" (don't know what else to call it) the younger (ages 25-45) moms. The only thing we can surmise is that she is mentally "off", combined with too much time on her hands. Or perhaps, someone laid into her (or worse) when she was that age with younger kids, and she has an ax to grind. Maybe her kids were taken away from her way back when?

But the kids are definitely on their own property, never anyone else's.

Should my friend get together with the other neighbors, with whom this woman finds imagined fault, and tell her to back off or else? Or just do the "or else" without warning? I don't know what my friend has in mind, off hand. But I know I would not want to cross her, myself.

Your "friend" whom you visit about once per week, needs to tell the woman to button it.

I don't understand why you are so invested in something that involves a friend you visit with once/week. You don't see the neighbor. Have you heard her yelling? Do you know for a fact that kids are never NEAR the neighbor, and ONLY on their own property... even when you aren't visiting?

OR... this could be your neighborhood, and there's far more to the story. Just guessing.

+100

Because she is a good friend. And you're next.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:30 to 45 yr old women are NOT young moms.

Younger than the perp.

Also, the "brain tumor" allegation is FAR more dramatic than the original post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'm there about once per week. I don't really see the neighbor, who lives 2-3 doors down.

The kids are no where NEAR the neighbor. In fact, the kids are ONLY on their own property. This is why it is puzzling that the neighbor (age 60ish) is so hell bent on "going after" (don't know what else to call it) the younger (ages 25-45) moms. The only thing we can surmise is that she is mentally "off", combined with too much time on her hands. Or perhaps, someone laid into her (or worse) when she was that age with younger kids, and she has an ax to grind. Maybe her kids were taken away from her way back when?

But the kids are definitely on their own property, never anyone else's.

Should my friend get together with the other neighbors, with whom this woman finds imagined fault, and tell her to back off or else? Or just do the "or else" without warning? I don't know what my friend has in mind, off hand. But I know I would not want to cross her, myself.

Your "friend" whom you visit about once per week, needs to tell the woman to button it.

I don't understand why you are so invested in something that involves a friend you visit with once/week. You don't see the neighbor. Have you heard her yelling? Do you know for a fact that kids are never NEAR the neighbor, and ONLY on their own property... even when you aren't visiting?

OR... this could be your neighborhood, and there's far more to the story. Just guessing.

+100

Because she is a good friend. And you're next.

Get your own life.

[Anonymous]

A few suggestions;

- ask a few of the young moms to gather late-night at another young mom's house and prank call her! Do *67 first.

- put some dog poop in a paper bag, place bag on offending neighbor's porch, light bag afire, ring bell/hide in bushes

- t.p. her house and car

- place a classified ad for free puppies and use her phone number

[Anonymous]

i have a feeling instead of "young moms" OP really means to say "moms to young kids," because it sounds like the age of the kids is more the issue than the age of the moms.

And it's believable to me that someone with early-onset dementia or some other mental health problem (including, yes, a brain tumor) could fixate on something like the behavior of young kids living nearby.

As far as how to handle it ... it's unclear whether the neighbor's behavior has reached a level that constitutes harassment. I'd suggest the various moms who have been targets for her anger have a meeting and compile a list of incidents, as detailed as possible. They you might consult an attorney and see if there's grounds for a restraining order or something like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend has a neighbor who goes after all of the moms with young children. The neighbor seems about aged 60, her own children are grown and gone, and it is clear that someone really wronged her. She is hell bent on getting young moms in trouble, or yelling at them, or just picking on them. We don't really know what she is hell bent on, we can only guess. To say she is off kilter is an understatement.

My friends have been in the neighborhood for years, so have most of the other young moms. I think perhaps the issue (or one of the issues, one can only imagine?) is that the complaining mom has lived there a few years longer, and may somehow take issue with the young moms and young children? Maybe she is reminded of her own mortality? Maybe she is reminded that her own children don't visit very often (my friend says they are local, and I visit every week, and have never seen them)?

Please don't say that my friend should be befriending this person, she has no interest, and thinks it will only get worse, if that were to happen. Besides, my friend knows she has nothing in common with someone who has all of this time on her hands (to complain)!

I guess I am asking, since her complaints are not legitimate, should they ignore her, or confront her and tell her to go fly a kite?

She once rang my friends doorbell, and screamed at her in front of the small neighborhood children, that (my friend) is a terrible mother - because my friend lets her kids play in (my friends' own) driveway! She scared the neighborhood children. I didn't see it, I showed up right after, but my friend was pretty shaken up - over something that should have been nothing. They were doing nothing wrong. Apparently, this woman has a problem with children playing outside?

Has anyone ever heard of this? [It's a dead end street, so the children are in zero danger, and wear their helmets when on bikes, etc.]

Gosh, no wonder her own children never visit!

Let me precipitate this advice for your friend with advice for you OP...
Let it go. It's not your neighborhood your friend and her neighbors should be able to put their heads together and come up with something so don't have a fit trying to figure something out for her.
Now - I would suggest to your friend that it's always best to confront people first, not only because if you confront them sooner you're less likely to be upset and emotional rather than confronting them later when you're worked up and angry and liable to fly off the handle. Confronting people when you have a problem shows that you respect yourself by not suppressing your thoughts/feelings and it shows that you respect others by not enabling their poor behavior.
But again - I think you should let it go; not your neighborhood not your problem.
If confronting this woman doesn't work then the neighbors may have to suck it up and

[Anonymous]

Well, in my neighborhood we have the kids (who are toddlers and preschoolers) toddling around behind my car when I back out. Or the mom will be standing there gabbing away while the kids play in the street. The kids tend to freeze, then run right for the car. So the neighbor may not wish to run over one of those kids. Two sides to every story. So glad when the mom who did that moved away. Grandmother.

[Anonymous]

OP you have only part of the real story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well, in my neighborhood we have the kids (who are toddlers and preschoolers) toddling around behind my car when I back out. Or the mom will be standing there gabbing away while the kids play in the street. The kids tend to freeze, then run right for the car. So the neighbor may not wish to run over one of those kids. Two sides to every story. So glad when the mom who did that moved away. Grandmother.

Three doors down? On their own property? Long distance hate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:i have a feeling instead of "young moms" OP really means to say "moms to young kids," because it sounds like the age of the kids is more the issue than the age of the moms.

And it's believable to me that someone with early-onset dementia or some other mental health problem (including, yes, a brain tumor) could fixate on something like the behavior of young kids living nearby.

As far as how to handle it ... it's unclear whether the neighbor's behavior has reached a level that constitutes harassment. I'd suggest the various moms who have been targets for her anger have a meeting and compile a list of incidents, as detailed as possible. They you might consult an attorney and see if there's grounds for a restraining order or something like that.

+1

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm guessing, in some way, you (whoever) are not watching your kids.

[Anonymous]

Wow, you could be describing my ex neighbour except she was a very aggressive lesbian photojournalist and we started to realize she was single white femaling me.

We moved because I always had a feeling that if she so much as heard playing in my home or on my property she would make a bs cps claim and destroy my family. When we had our second baby we moved to another neighbourhood. Get out and get away. It gets better when you don't have to hide from your neighbour.

[Anonymous]

OP, did you post recently about a neighbor who was harassing a fenced-in dog, unprovoked? Sounds so similar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, you could be describing my ex neighbour except she was a very aggressive lesbian photojournalist and we started to realize she was single white femaling me.

We moved because I always had a feeling that if she so much as heard playing in my home or on my property she would make a bs cps claim and destroy my family. When we had our second baby we moved to another neighbourhood. Get out and get away. It gets better when you don't have to hide from your neighbour.

Yeah, that's probably it. What passes for insight in your feverish brain.