a girl classmate called DS gay

[Anonymous]

Typical, no worries just tell him to man up

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Typical, no worries just tell him to man up

What, exactly, does "manning up" consist of, in this context?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be less concerned with reporting it thanby making sure DS knows that "gay" is not an insult and anyone who thinks it is is mistaken.

Darling, in elementary school, "gay" is very much an insult. It was a taunt, wasn't it?

"Gay" is certainly MEANT as an insult. It isn't one, though. OP needs to make sure that OP's son knows that.

It is, indeed, an insult in school. In fact, in much of the world, being called "gay" is absolutely an insult. It implies that you're a degenerate. You and I, as tolerant and reasonable people, know how other people get their rocks off isn't worthy of discussion, but it's rather clumsy to just declare that being called "gay" isn't an insult because you see nothing wrong with homosexuality. The INTENTION here is all that matters. A pithy comeback that seeks to assert that there's nothing wrong with being gay isn't particularly effective here or in any bullying situation.

Of course, I doubt very seriously that the girl knows what being "gay" means. She just heard an older sibling or something in media dismissing something or someone as being "so gay."

It's wonderful that you're tolerant. Really, it is. But you also need to understand what's going on here. Saying "gay is not an insult" does not make it so. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical, no worries just tell him to man up

What, exactly, does "manning up" consist of, in this context?

Don't be a pussy.

I also prefer cowboy up.

Our boys are getting way too soft.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd tell him to respond, "it's not nice to call people gay as an insult. There's nothing wrong with being gay."

So would it have been better if she called him effeminate and a sissy?

[Anonymous]

Maybe this girl has a crush on your son and is frustrated because he doesn't reciprocate. In any case, I'm not sure we should tolerate a lot of behavior in schools that we wouldn't tolerate in the workplace. If it happens again, I would mention it to the school counselor and ask her to figure out how to approach these kinds of harassing insults without mentioning the perp's name. School isn't just a place for learning how to man up, it's also a place where they're supposed to be comfortable so they can focus on learning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical, no worries just tell him to man up

What, exactly, does "manning up" consist of, in this context?

Don't be a pussy.

I also prefer cowboy up.

Our boys are getting way too soft.

What, exactly, does "not being a pussy" consist of, in this context?

I'm assuming you're not advising OP to get OP's son a horse and a herd of longhorns.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical, no worries just tell him to man up

What, exactly, does "manning up" consist of, in this context?

Don't be a pussy.

I also prefer cowboy up.

Our boys are getting way too soft.

What, exactly, does "not being a pussy" consist of, in this context?

I'm assuming you're not advising OP to get OP's son a horse and a herd of longhorns.

Obviously, the PP is suggesting your son hit the girl.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typical, no worries just tell him to man up

What, exactly, does "manning up" consist of, in this context?

Don't be a pussy.

I also prefer cowboy up.

Our boys are getting way too soft.

What, exactly, does "not being a pussy" consist of, in this context?

I'm assuming you're not advising OP to get OP's son a horse and a herd of longhorns.

Don't feed the troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be less concerned with reporting it thanby making sure DS knows that "gay" is not an insult and anyone who thinks it is is mistaken.

I agree with this. It's amazing that "gay" is still considered an insult.

[Anonymous]

I'm sure this girl hears her lame-o family throwing gay around as an insult and is just parroting it. Feel bad for her and if it continues, then talk to the school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe this girl has a crush on your son and is frustrated because he doesn't reciprocate. In any case, I'm not sure we should tolerate a lot of behavior in schools that we wouldn't tolerate in the workplace. If it happens again, I would mention it to the school counselor and ask her to figure out how to approach these kinds of harassing insults without mentioning the perp's name. School isn't just a place for learning how to man up, it's also a place where they're supposed to be comfortable so they can focus on learning.

Are you serious? Kids are not adults. You can't expect them to behave the way adults in the workplace behave. They are learning. "Perp"??? Please. The OP's DS needs to learn how to deal with situations like this, which are relatively minor. Someone tried to hurt his feelings by calling him a bad word -- in 4th grade. He will live.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be less concerned with reporting it thanby making sure DS knows that "gay" is not an insult and anyone who thinks it is is mistaken.

I agree with this. It's amazing that "gay" is still considered an insult.

It's not that amazing at all. You live in a tolerance bubble. Gays are pretty much universally hated around the world, including much of the US. It's sad, but true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be less concerned with reporting it thanby making sure DS knows that "gay" is not an insult and anyone who thinks it is is mistaken.

I agree with this. It's amazing that "gay" is still considered an insult.

It's not that amazing at all. You live in a tolerance bubble. Gays are pretty much universally hated around the world, including much of the US. It's sad, but true.

Well, not around here. Is this posted in the DC area?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe this girl has a crush on your son and is frustrated because he doesn't reciprocate. In any case, I'm not sure we should tolerate a lot of behavior in schools that we wouldn't tolerate in the workplace. If it happens again, I would mention it to the school counselor and ask her to figure out how to approach these kinds of harassing insults without mentioning the perp's name. School isn't just a place for learning how to man up, it's also a place where they're supposed to be comfortable so they can focus on learning.

Are you serious? Kids are not adults. You can't expect them to behave the way adults in the workplace behave. They are learning. "Perp"??? Please. The OP's DS needs to learn how to deal with situations like this, which are relatively minor. Someone tried to hurt his feelings by calling him a bad word -- in 4th grade. He will live.

You're offended by use of the word perp? I never said you don't let the one off insult go. Harassment should be addressed because some kids need to have boundaries explained to them and yes I understand they are not adults, you moron. Yes, they are learning and sometimes that involves TEACHING.