lost clothes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Next time your daughter asks for the towel, dial your MIL and have the your MIL explain why she has not sent it.

That would make the OP 100 times worse than her MIL. There is no excuse for getting a child involved in adult disputes.

So what is the OP to tell her daughter - oh I keep forgetting to ask grandma for the towel?

How about "I forgot to bring them home, and your grandma has other stuff to do besides run around behind me and fix MY mistake. But I'm going to keep blaming her anyway."

[Anonymous]

Send all the shot she ships to you back to her until you get your items back. Why should she get the pleasure of giving gifts to her grandkids while she is being a hitch to you?

[Anonymous]

At first I thought you were being dramatic over a dress, but given that she seems to be deliberate now, I will say you should stick it to her.

I'm with PP who said to speak with FIL as well. Tell him you've repeated asked MIL and you hope he will follow through and bring your things. Or have DH do it to present a united front. Also have DD ask MIL directly. If she doesn't bring it have her tell DD to her face that she's not getting them back. And also confront her directly " I guess you are playing some kind of game because I can't believe anyone would have forgotten this many times. I don't appreciate it and sadly it hurts Lily who now can't enjoy her towel and swimsuit set while it fits or her dress while she can wear it. It was pretty mean to keep that from her."

[Anonymous]

To all the pps who are blaming op for forgetting the items, have you never forgotten or misplaced an item? Has your child never forgotten an item at school? Wouldn't you expect her teacher, or classmate, return her item when the find it? Or, next time your dd leaves something at the playground, it should just belong to the finder? I'm pretty sure you'd be on here indignantly demanding your dd's item be returned to her. Returned from a total stranger. Op is asking FAMILY!!!!

[Anonymous]

Let it go, OP. you are being unreasonable.

[Anonymous]

OP, please ignore all the doormats telling you to just let it go. I understand how you must feel -- this dress was handmade for you by your grandmother, and is very special to you.

If your MIL doesn't have it when she arrives, I think you have the right to have a straightforward conversation with her about it. Ask her why she hasn't returned it, explain to her why it's important for you to have it back, say you just can't understand why she hasn't been able to manage to send it yo you. Tell her you'll be sending a prepaid shipping box, and you expect her to return the dress as soon as possible. Period.

[Anonymous]

I'd be tempted to tell her that if she doesn't get it you by the time she arrives, you'll be driving her straight to a hotel instead of your house. but really, at this point you need to be dealing with FIL since MIL obviouslywon't send it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At first I thought you were being dramatic over a dress, but given that she seems to be deliberate now, I will say you should stick it to her.

I'm with PP who said to speak with FIL as well. Tell him you've repeated asked MIL and you hope he will follow through and bring your things. Or have DH do it to present a united front. Also have DD ask MIL directly. If she doesn't bring it have her tell DD to her face that she's not getting them back. And also confront her directly " I guess you are playing some kind of game because I can't believe anyone would have forgotten this many times. I don't appreciate it and sadly it hurts Lily who now can't enjoy her towel and swimsuit set while it fits or her dress while she can wear it. It was pretty mean to keep that from her."

I actually don't see any evidence she's doing it deliberately. I can see myself forgetting about it as I make packages, and never remembering to actively do it.

[Anonymous]

op here. i forgot the stuff. my bad.

actually, MIL had a "special" closet where she put the towels after swimming and that's where DD's dress was placed by MIL after a trip to the pool one day, so one could argue that if, perhaps, MIL just let me put all our stuff in our room, I wouldn't have forgotten either item.

But that's not the point.

I will have to call FIL, but I feel weird about it - like it will seem as if i am deliberately going behind her back, but I'll do it.

I love the idea of the postage paid envelope. If the items don't come on Xmas, I will send them back with a postage paid envelope. it seems so stupid now - asking for a beach blanket and a sleeveless dress back...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:op here. i forgot the stuff. my bad.

actually, MIL had a "special" closet where she put the towels after swimming and that's where DD's dress was placed by MIL after a trip to the pool one day, so one could argue that if, perhaps, MIL just let me put all our stuff in our room, I wouldn't have forgotten either item.

But that's not the point.

I will have to call FIL, but I feel weird about it - like it will seem as if i am deliberately going behind her back, but I'll do it.

I love the idea of the postage paid envelope. If the items don't come on Xmas, I will send them back with a postage paid envelope. it seems so stupid now - asking for a beach blanket and a sleeveless dress back...

Asking for the dress back isn't stupid. But let the towel go. I would call FIL, and have a long conversation about the meaning of the dress for you, but don't blame mil to him. and tell dh that you all are staying at a hotel next time.

[Anonymous]

Have you considered the possibility that the reason she hasn't returned them is because she discarded them before she realized how much you really wanted them?

To her they were some old dress and a bath towel. Not cherished items. So maybe she added them to a good will bag without thinking and they are long gone and she just can't bring herself to tell you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you considered the possibility that the reason she hasn't returned them is because she discarded them before she realized how much you really wanted them?

To her they were some old dress and a bath towel. Not cherished items. So maybe she added them to a good will bag without thinking and they are long gone and she just can't bring herself to tell you.

but she called me on the way to the airport (from leaving her house) to tell me i'd left them! and i toldher right away that i wanted her to mail them to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you considered the possibility that the reason she hasn't returned them is because she discarded them before she realized how much you really wanted them?

To her they were some old dress and a bath towel. Not cherished items. So maybe she added them to a good will bag without thinking and they are long gone and she just can't bring herself to tell you.

but she called me on the way to the airport (from leaving her house) to tell me i'd left them! and i toldher right away that i wanted her to mail them to me.

Yeah but life got busy, the stuff got shuffled around and before she knew it she couldn't find it anymore? It happens. It may have not been malicious at all but simple forgetfulness.