Response to gift - what to do?

[Anonymous]

Sorry OP. Your SIL sounds nuts. I would continue to ignore or allow DH to run interference.

[Anonymous]

we could have the same sil! i dread when she mails anything.

i would be so annoyed knowing we have to go through this insane behavior every single month! if your dd isnt into the gift i would be upfront with her. you cant make a kid like something.

[Anonymous]

what on earth is this gift that keeps on giving?

[Anonymous]

Wow, that's rich. Did you respond to her latest crazy? Did you ever tell us if it is your brother's wife or your husband's sister? I am wondering if she was always crazy about giving gifts since she was young, and your husband would know if he grew up with her.

[Anonymous]

I think that at this point (with a second installment of something that is going to come monthly) I would just go with shutting the whole thing down.

Dear SIL,
DD and I are so incredibly grateful that you thought of DD on her birthday. However, we realize that this gift is huge and can't possibly ask you to keep paying for it over and over -- DD is just so happy to have gotten even one (or two issues!). Please don't worry so much about it -- please do not feel like you should pay for future issues.

---

And then if she asks about future issues pretend you didn't get them. She will think you are ungrateful but all this over a fashion magazine that is totally inappropriate for a fashion magazine? You can't be expected to be so overly polite for so long, and constant contact late into the night is really dysfunctional on her part.

[Anonymous]

My sister sends out email demands for every "big" occasion in her family and asks everyone to send a card, letter or email to her about family member being celebrated so she can put them in DC's or present all to DH.

Beyond annoying and so narcissistic.

I've resorted to making my kids scribble notes on construction paper, although this is fast becoming a non option as they're all school age now.

[Anonymous]

DC each have scrapbooks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP bumping this back up. SIL has now sent three texts, 2 emails, and 1 call (all since 10pm last night) to ask if we got the latest installment on friday b/c she has been following the tracking. well, we did, but haven't opened it yet. so, she sent another snarky email saying that if it wasn't worth it to us, she wants to cancel b/c it costs money every month we keep it. Contrary to her telling me it is a 1 year subscription with a single payment, but whatever,

Just annoyed that this is continuing and continuing.

Bloody annoying OP!!!

I'd take this as an opportunity. "Dear SIL, I really appreciate you thinking of Daughter but if this subscription is expensive enough that you are this concerned about tracking every issue then I think perhaps I agree with you that you should cancel it. Honestly, while the thought was lovely Daughter is a little young for the content and I'm not sure she will get sufficient enjoyment of it for the level of effort and concern it is requiring of you. I also need to confess that there is no way I will be able to keep up with notifying you every time an issue arrives. That isn't personal, just a reality of our day to day business. So perhaps it's best if you just cancel it."

Let her get all ticked off and snarky - she sounds like a total PITA. So what if she thinks you're ungrateful and rude. If it takes you off her gift/harassment list that's a small price to pay right?!

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Agree with 10:42's response above. Whatever money she is spending on this "golden" subscription would be better spent on an anti-anxiety medication for herself.

[Anonymous]

OP here - so I sent a letter describing the gift and saying that some of the content isn't for a 5 year old, but that DD would probably love anything that came from her aunt and that I'm not sure it's worth the $10/month (magazine comes with stickers and a trinket).

No reply.

How interesting after 5 million texts, we have radio silence. I'm pretty sure she's pissed, but what can I do?

Sigh.

[Anonymous]

Nothing. Good Lord, OP. That sounds exhausting. I have an aunt just like this. When I was new first time mom of 3 weeks she pestered me for a solid 10 days about which baby swing to send (unsolicited, I had planned on getting one off CL), wouldn't respond until I chose it myself on Amazon, then didn't like Amazon, then sent it, then emailed/called to see if it had gotten there, and wait for it....she sent two. So I had two giant boxes arrive and had to return one. Also I was a single mom so had to take care of this alone.

I finally got my dad on the horn and told him to get his sister in check, period. Probably a little harsh but I was post-partum and felt harassed! SIL's texts are about SIL. Sounds like it's time your DH sets some boundaries. Also, she doesn't have kids, does she?