Is this a hint?

Anonymous wrote:My grandparents have me a WEDDING gift with a card inscribed just to me. This is basically how they treated in-laws in general. My DH was amused. I was not.

That might just be because they are older. Traditionally wedding gifts were addressed to the bride. I got gifts from DH's older relatives that were addressed just to me, and obviously they weren't trying to slight him since they're his family.

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11/09/2013 15:37

Subject: Is this a hint?

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Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The video thing is not that weird. The Christmas card thing, however, is rude as shit. Why isn't your DH sticking up for you?

+1000

Agree. Totally weird.

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11/10/2013 23:19

Subject: Is this a hint?

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Anonymous

DH is not sticking up for her because SIL is rude as sh*t and would love to see a falling out between OP and DH.

I'd put money on it.

Sorry you have a sh*t stirring SIL, as do I, OP. Say something short and sweet to her so she has no ammo against you. GL.

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11/11/2013 11:13

Subject: Is this a hint?

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Anonymous

I used to send photos from my Iphone to my in-laws, but I kept getting SIL or MIL or someone complaining when they were left off. They were complaining because they were sitting right next to their husband and could see the picture, so I don't know what the fuss is about. So now I just don't send any pictures to my in-laws in case I happen to forget to type in one number and create a problem.

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11/11/2013 19:51

Subject: Is this a hint?

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Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:Yes

plus a million.

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11/11/2013 19:59

Subject: Re:Is this a hint?

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Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:Unless it's out of character for them (have you been included in the past?), I wouldn't give it too much thought. My DH is one of five kids, and he and his siblings only send stuff like pictures etc to the other siblings, usually not to the siblings' spouses. I guess it's then up to each person whether they want to share with their spouse (dh sometimes shares with me, sometimes not). I never thought it was weird or felt excluded.

OP: This.

Some people just always assume (without even realizing they do it) that what they send to one person is being forwarded by that person to his or her significant others if the original recipient -- your husband, in this case -- wants to forward it. Your BIL sent it to his brother, period, and probably assumed that his brother sent it to his wife, namely you. I know many people who send things only to one half of a couple, leaving it up to the person who gets it to decide whether to pass it along.

Have you asked your husband why he didn't forward it? That seems like a better use of your time and energy than brooding over why you were excluded, especially since this might not have been about excluding you at all.

Have you asked yourself why this matters enough to you for you to feel this strongly about it? If they exclude and exclude you in myriad ways and leave you out of conversations while you are sitting right there in the flesh, that's one thing to be upset about. But if this really is about one video and one photo and one Christmas card....that doesn't really add up to major exclusion or even to a "hint."

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11/12/2013 21:18

Subject: Is this a hint?

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Anonymous

My husband's adult children do this. They text/email photos of their kids to him and the rest of the family, but rarely me.