DH constantly putting me down, especially my appearance

[Anonymous]

You could talk to him again about how much these comments hurt you and how it's not fair for him to keep punishing you for these transgressions he's so resentful about. Emphasize your feeling that unless you both can let go of the past and start being nice to each other, the marriage is over.

If he agrees (will try not to do the insults, etc.) then tell him that next time he does it, you are literally going to leave the room. And then do it. Have a stock phrase prepared, something like, "Comments like that hurt my feelings and I'm not going to tolerate it." Then leave. Even better when you're out with friends -- say it in front of everyone, leave, and let him make an explanation.

If he refuses to stop insulting you, then, honestly, your marriage is going nowhere. Get your own therapist, consult a divorce attorney, and prepare to move on.