Children's books that drive you crazy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Giving Tree.

I hate this friggin book. The tree is a total doormat. Really, it's happy in the end when it's just a stump?? Its sole purpose was to please the boy/man? Sure, it's noble and all to give and want nothing in return, but not when someone is destroying your very existence and calling. That's not love. I wish someone would rewrite it and create a more symbiotic relationship btwn the boy and tree. You know, boy grows into a man, makes $$ selling apples, expands his business by planting apple seeds and growing more seeds, selectively prunes branches to build a house, has a family and son plays in tree just like when he was a kid.. . Everybody is HAPPY! Yay!

Sorry, I went on a rant and forgot to mention what other books annoy me - pretty much all of Sandra Boynton's books.

Also realized I was typing so fast I made a fair share of typos. I'm sure you can figure it out though.

[Anonymous]

Another Fox in Socks hater here. Also, Oh Say Can You Say. Just too much work to read those!
Also hate any book that is based on an animated movie. They're all terrible. My DD once checked out a book at the library based on the Monsters Inc movie, and it was so awful that I had to flat out refuse to read it.

[Anonymous]

There are so many badly written, badly messaged books out there, no?

I have two kids ages 2 and 5. I was able to "control" the books we had with our first until she turned about, ooooh, four. Then she received a bunch of Disney princess "Golden" books from her grandma, and all hell broke loose.

So my LEAST favorite are:

1. Anything Disney princess spin-off. They spin-off stuff is MUCH WORSE than the original source material. The princesses are typically even meeker, milder, and even more gender-stereotyped. E.g., Sleeping Beauty, after she gets married, stays home to organize parties at the palace while her husband, Prince Phillip, travels. Presumably on business. EFF YOU, DISNEY SPIN-OFF CRAP!

Which brings me to....

2. Anything Barbie. See #1, but way, way worse.

3. Almost all rhyming books for kids. The rhymes are so damn tortured. Blech. Exception: Good Night Moon (which is not so much rhymey as alliterative) ~ I love that book as an adult. As a kid, I think the shape-shifting illustrations would've bothered the snot out of me (are the socks hanging on the drying rack or NOT???)

4. Almost all celebrity authored books. So far the only one I've liked--just a little bit--is Lydia Bastianich's family Christmas book. The writing's not great, but her love of food, family, and food, and Italy, and food shines through. Plus, there are recipes at the end.

The end of my rant! I feel so cleansed!

[Anonymous]

The Rainbow Fish. It's about a special fish who has sparkly, colorful scales, and none of the plain fish like him because of it. He asks the wise octopus (or something) what to do and does the octopus tell the fish to just be humble and find fish who will accept him for who he is? No. He says to give one of his scale to all the other fish, and then everyone will be the same (one colorful scale) and everyone will like him, which is what happens. Appalling.

[Anonymous]

4. Almost all celebrity authored books. So far the only one I've liked--just a little bit--is Lydia Bastianich's family Christmas book. The writing's not great, but her love of food, family, and food, and Italy, and food shines through. Plus, there are recipes at the end.

The only one of these I enjoy is Spike Lee's Please Baby, Please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

4. Almost all celebrity authored books. So far the only one I've liked--just a little bit--is Lydia Bastianich's family Christmas book. The writing's not great, but her love of food, family, and food, and Italy, and food shines through. Plus, there are recipes at the end.

The only one of these I enjoy is Spike Lee's Please Baby, Please.

I'm the PP you quoted. Okay, I'm going to check that one out! Shouldn't surprise me that Lee's book would be on the "good read" list, as he's an accomplished artist-of-written-and-spoken-and-acted word!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not a fan of Goodnight Moon. The old lady whispering hush creeps me out.

I thought I was the only one that didn't like the old lady whispering hush!

Doesn't stop me from reading it to my DS every few nights though.

[Anonymous]

I *love* Fox in Socks, but that may be because I've gotten really good at it, and it's turned into a game where we see how quickly I can get through it without making any mistakes. I also love Sandra Boyton's books--I prefer rhyming books for younger kids and hers are cute and funny and the rhymes are not usually tortured.

I *hate* Runaway Bunny. Creepy stalker mommy there. Also dislike Rainbow Fish. They could have emphasized the sharing of things and de-emphasized the appearance issues and made it a much better book.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

4. Almost all celebrity authored books. So far the only one I've liked--just a little bit--is Lydia Bastianich's family Christmas book. The writing's not great, but her love of food, family, and food, and Italy, and food shines through. Plus, there are recipes at the end.

The only one of these I enjoy is Spike Lee's Please Baby, Please.

I'm the PP you quoted. Okay, I'm going to check that one out! Shouldn't surprise me that Lee's book would be on the "good read" list, as he's an accomplished artist-of-written-and-spoken-and-acted word!

It's very simple and good for toddlers & babies. I think the rhythm and reoccurring use of “Please” and “Baby” make it enjoyable and easy to understand during the time when they are still learning to communicate.

*Sorry for the thread hijack.

[Anonymous]

Goodnight Moon. Hate that book. I always feel like there are missing pages.

[Anonymous]

The same person who gave us "I love you forever" (which I despise) also gave us one called "These Things I Wish" which is really also obnoxious. Anyone else have that one? The kids read it the other day and couldn't figure out why anyone would wish someone else to get a black eye...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Giving Tree.

Agree! What is the moral of the story? Give everything you have to some ungrateful lout and you are left... a stump?

Yes, valorizes victimhood.

[Anonymous]

Super Pooper. Worst potty training book ever! And my DS makes me read it every friggin night!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Curious George. In the first few pages the man in the yellow hat kidnaps George in a sack. Later in the book George spends some time in prison.

I love the non-politically correctness of the CG books.

And I love the Giving Tree. It's about unconditional love.

I don't care for SkippyJon Jones books. I know there are others that I don't like, but we rarely pull them off of the shelf, so the names escape me.

It teaches kids that it's never okay to set boundaries with people they love. They have to give everything they have to their family, even if it destroys them.

[Anonymous]

Here are some more:

1. Polar Express. Amazing illustrations, but the writing is just plain terrible. Plus, Santa and the Elves kind of are reminiscent of something Orwellian. 1984, maybe? Creepy.

2. Elf on a Shelf. Again, crappy writing. Creepy. Orwellian. Yuck.