Is a nice big house really worth it when an older, smaller one is totally adequate?

[Anonymous]

OP here again. Hit the submit button too soon. So let me rephrase the question then, without the "stigma on kids" part:

Is it really worth it to shell out 1.2M + increased interest and taxes for an admittedly nice and new house that we could afford, if an older one would be sufficient in terms of appearance and square footage?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I are looking to buy in an area where starter homes are $ 800k and the average sale price is $ 1.2M. We have 300k savings. We could actually afford the monthly payments on a 1.2M house (HHI 400k, no debt). I just hate the idea of spending 7k every month for 15 years when we could be spending 3k.

To those of you with older kids: how much stigma do your children experience if you live in a 1950s split-level instead of a 4000 sq ft home dating from the early 2000s? I am aware that the home is the nr. 1 status symbol. Would my child feel more self-confident inviting friends over to the 4000 sq ft home instead of the 1600 sq ft split-level or rambler? Is that worth 400k + interest + increased real-estate taxes?

Apart from the children, how much do you think your own standing in the community is affected by what kind of house do you have?

We plan to live in our next house for at least 20 years, so I do not consider it an investment. Even if we buy the more expensive house, the upkeep will have cost so much by the time we sell it that I do not expect to make any profit.

You should speak to 3-4 lenders and get pre approved for a $800k-$1.4k property. For our $1.35k property we could have had $4.3k piti for a 10 yr I/O loan or $5.5k monthly piti for a 30 yr fixed.
We went for the long term house, no regrets.

If you have the VA loan the no downpayment limit was bumped up to 820k and the rate is 3.25% no points with a credit at closing.

[Anonymous]

Did you become a doc to increase your standing in the community and to reduce the stigma of a "lesser job"?

[Anonymous]

Oh excuse me, "physician".

[Anonymous]

No. I became a pediatrician so that I can have a stable middle-class lifestyle - and because I like kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. I became a pediatrician so that I can have a stable middle-class lifestyle - and because I like kids.

Yikes!

[Anonymous]

Since my kids know that I grew up in smelly rags, they are GRATEFUL for the house we live in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Make it warm and cozy and comfortable and it will be a place that you and your family can be happy."

OP is waay too tightly wound to ever do this!

I'm so glad that my post also gave you insight into my decorating skills. Again, I'm thrilled that my family will live among such prejudice-free people

[Anonymous]

OP ignore the haters. My kids have been judged by the parents of other kids ( at least initially) because we live in a condo as opposed to a sfh. It is often assumed we are low SES. But I don't care enough to change are current living status, we just move on from these people. So to answer your question, I think it makes a difference to some people. All you have to do is check out the school blogs you'll see there are plenty of folks putting others down based on wether they lived on the grander side of a certain zip code or not. I read one recently where a poster was chastised for being poser because they live in a rambler and not the grander houses in the area. Some people may pretend there's no elephant in this room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Make it warm and cozy and comfortable and it will be a place that you and your family can be happy."

OP is waay too tightly wound to ever do this!

I'm so glad that my post also gave you insight into my decorating skills. Again, I'm thrilled that my family will live among such prejudice-free people

Wow! You are obtuse! A warm and cozy and comfortable home has very little to do with decorating skills. Really, really obtuse.

[Anonymous]

*SES* I meant LES

[Anonymous]

It may be the sociology student but perceived status is important. If you're happier about your status in the community, your kids will be happier.

Some folks would rather reign in exurban or marginal neighborhood hell than serve in DCUM paradise.

I freely cop to being one of them.

[Anonymous]

Buy the biggest house you can to hedge against inflation.

[Anonymous]

Buy the biggest house you can to hedge against inflation.

[Anonymous]

This question is bizarre, but assuming it's for real - I 100% agree that there are going to be people (and kids) who judge you and your kid based on what kind of house you live in. But honestly HONESTLY you want to teach your kids that that's what's important? You want to spend $400k extra plus all the maintenance that will be required just so you can impress judgy people? Wouldn't you rather choose a house that you are comfortable in, that allows you some financial cushion, that doesn't take all weekend maintaining (or cost a ton to have people help you), that doesn't require tons and tons of furniture for all the rooms, etc, etc? And then have friends who like you for who you are?