Am I insane to be TTC when my first child is 9?

[Anonymous]

I am one of 5. Myself and my two older sisters were the "first stage family" - we were all born close together, then 9 years later my brother came along and three years after that another sister. I get on great with the younger two and always have. I remember being extremely excited when my Mum was expecting the others. My sisters also. The family dynamic was always great. In fact the only sibling issue is that my older sisters, who are 16 months apart pretty much can't stand each other now - always crazy competitive growing up too. Everyone else has always and continues to get along fine.

[Anonymous]

Haven't read previous posts but I have an 8 yr gap between my kids and I had my second at 45. I used my own egg. I have posted before about this. We did several IVF cycles.

I honestly would rather be 67 at my daughters college graduation than never to have her around at all. That's the way I see it.

And her much older sibling adores her and vice versa!

Good luck to you.

[Anonymous]

I was almost 10 years older than my youngest brother, who was only 9 when I left for college. When I was still at home, I adored him but in the way a teenage girl adores a puppy or a baby - our age difference was too great for us to have the same experiences, memories, or concerns in life. Now that we're both adults, I am much closer to him than to our middle brother who is only 4 years younger than me. Our personalities are just a better fit. However, I would still not describe us as having a "close" relationship. We go months without talking.

[Anonymous]

Is this even worth debating? Realistically you are 44. If you had trouble conceiving with IVF years ago the odds are not in your favor OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is this even worth debating? Realistically you are 44. If you had trouble conceiving with IVF years ago the odds are not in your favor OP.

Read the post - whe intends to use donor eggs. Not a guarantee by any stretch, but not directly comparable to failure of IVF with her own eggs.

[Anonymous]

we've been trying for #2 on our own since #1 was 4 - she's 6 now and in 1st grade. We're about to move to treatments - I'm 35. The earliest she is going to have a sibling, if at all, is 7.

If you are happy with your decision, then go for it. Life isn't always perfect, and we can't all have the perfect spacing or perfect situation or whatever we are supposed to be doing. And no one else gets to tell you how you are supposed to do things, either.

I hope it works out as you want. Good luck.