Today's my birthday and I need to vent

[Anonymous]

It sounds like there is something going on with your husband that your are completely oblivious to, OP. You say he's done these things in the past and you didn't even get so much as a goodnight from him. You say he blew through his money this month and said 'These are stressful times'. You also make mention of your baby. Is this your first child? Have you suddenly become a SAHM or is he having trouble sharing your attention while you care for the baby and juggle a career? Sounds like there is more to the story. I'm the PP that said that you need to communicate what you want. Sounds like your DH also needs to communicate something to you as well.

This might be a symptom of something bigger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:guy here. can i throw out some assumptions and you tell me if im wrong.

you are a hard ass who needs everything to "be right" and fall into place etc to the point that anything your husband does "isnt right". so if he did make dinner reservations, it was for the wrong restaurant, if he did get you flowers, they were the wrong kind. you just an ass overall.

with that said, your husband has given up because there is no pleasing you. sure he can bust his ass for you and all but if he knows you will nitpick the hell out of everything he did, why bother putting any effort since the result is going to be negative?

again, i am totally assuming here and am not saying with certainty that this is who you are. just throwing it out there for thought.

You sound like a very lazy man

[Anonymous]

OP, I would not let it go. I would sit him down and tell him how his behavior affected you. I would keep it non emotional, try not to cry. Then I would get up from table and walk away, maybe even leave the house. Give him some time to think about what a total asshole he is.

I can not believe husband's treat their wives this way. Talk about taking someone for granted.

Men/women get away with whatever you let them get away with. A birthday is a special occasion and the least he could do is give you a card and some damn flowers.

Laziness is no excuse for his behavior. This excuse is some bullshit. Again, he can do it because it's tolerated.

Happy Belated Birthday, OP!

[Anonymous]

Some of you are just plain cold hearted. Has money made you that way?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like there is something going on with your husband that your are completely oblivious to, OP. You say he's done these things in the past and you didn't even get so much as a goodnight from him. You say he blew through his money this month and said 'These are stressful times'. You also make mention of your baby. Is this your first child? Have you suddenly become a SAHM or is he having trouble sharing your attention while you care for the baby and juggle a career? Sounds like there is more to the story. I'm the PP that said that you need to communicate what you want. Sounds like your DH also needs to communicate something to you as well.

This might be a symptom of something bigger.

Agreed. You sound clueless. This is not a man who forgets your birthday every year. He got you tulips for V-Day and made you a special dinner last year. WAKE UP, something is wrong, something is off. Don't bring up the birthday thing again. I would shut up for a few days and watch. Has something changed? Does he seem different? Sit down and initiate a judgment free conversation. Say he sounds stressed. Say you support him and you want to make sure you are doing that. Ask him if he feels fine. Ask him about the state of your marriage.

I just get a vibe from this post. In 3 years, the OP could be looking back on these incidents as a precusor to a mid-life-crisis or affair.

[Anonymous]

Also, he said that these are "stressful times."

I think it is important to explore this further. There may be something wrong that he's not telling you about. It seems really strange that he would respect your feelings about birthdays in the past, but not this year, and then say that.