How can I tell my 10YO DD that I have cancer

[Anonymous]

OP Here...we told her. She kind of knew. She was with me in the ER when the DR told me I had a mass. The reality is probably not as scary as she is thinking. She thought it was cancer. And she understands that it will be cured by surgery.

[Anonymous]

I am very glad you told her. Good luck, OP.

Here's some more advice learned the hard way. Make sure you include her in helping take care of you, or helping your wife. There are many things she can do at that age, including fetching things, helping clean up dinner, being extra cooperative... Including her in your care will really help make a difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:13:39 I appreciate your opinion, that the doctor is an oncologist, but are you a child psychologist? As for OP's wife not processing, I actually wonder if she's dealing with so much, that she'd prefer not to have to deal with her child's reaction to what for all intents and purposes is not necessary information. That's more practical than repressive. (I'm a PP who has advised to wait and see if it's necessary to tell all. Yes if OP needs chemo or any treatment with side effects.)

Whatever you do OP, good luck to you and yours!

No, I am not a psychologist. However I am very, very experienced with what to tell perceptive nine year olds about cancer and treatment. I have unfortunately met many, many oncologists, radiologists, and other professionals. I know an awful lot about what it is like to live in a house while caring for someone recovering from abdominal surgery (which doesn't always go as they planned) and at the same time taking care of a child. I would also have preferred not to have to deal with my child. I have also been a perceptive child in his kid's shoes. Hang out at some cancer websites and you will read plenty about this topic.

OP, I wish you luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP Here...we told her. She kind of knew. She was with me in the ER when the DR told me I had a mass. The reality is probably not as scary as she is thinking. She thought it was cancer. And she understands that it will be cured by surgery.

Good for you for talking with her about it. Well done. Best wishes to you, OP!!!

[Anonymous]

20:20 Thanks for response.

OP, good luck to you and to your family, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:20:20 Thanks for response.

OP, good luck to you and to your family, too.

thanks.