Miss Jane vs. Ms. Smith vs. Jane vs. Mom - What do your kids friends call you?

[Anonymous]

I prefer firstname only. But its not a big deal if that's not what other people's kids use.

Our kids use whatever the adult prefers. For some they use last names, for others they use first names, etc.

I disagree that using Mr./Mrs./Miss Lastname teaches respect. Most kids don't make that connection and its very possible to be disrespectful while using last names (and its possible to be respectful while using first names).

[Anonymous]

I think you have to be a real asshole if you want them to refer you as Mrs Last name or even Ms First name.

Teaching your children to call other adults as Mrs/Mr/Ms is really correct...now...not accepting being addressed by your first name is totally different and it shows how you feel entitled for...I don't know what! Also it shows that you are an asshole. TIA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD is only 3, so we haven't had a lot of experience with this yet. The children of our closest friends refer to us as "Aunt" and "Uncle," although for some reason DD mostly calls them by their first names or by funny made-up names that are kind of an inside joke. DH is Brazilian and grew up calling all adults "Mr./Mrs. First name." He calls my parents this too. I think it's a nice sign of respect for elders, but it depends on the relationship and the age gap, in my opinion. I would probably never refer to an 80-year old by his/her first name, but maybe cultural norms are changing in this regard, as I would not be offended if my kids' friends end up just using my first name. I think we'll probably teach DD to use titles unless the person instructs us to use his or her first name.

this, but we're from the U.S. but kids who call me by my first name, it doesn't bother me. but i generally think the kids who call me Mrs. Firstname have better manners (or parents with better manners.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i think it is rude for children to call adults by their first name, but it seems prevalent in western culture with the exception of african american culture.i cringe when my white american friends tell their kids to refer to me by my first name. in other cultures, this is considered very rude and disrespectful.

What backward countries are these?

AMERICA.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, it would throw me off to have a five year old say "Hey Karen, what's up?" to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I prefer being called by my first name. However, my children can call the adults they meet what the adult prefers. If I am not sure I ask, "What may DC call you?"

I think this is the most appropriate way to do it, that way everyone's happy. I grew up in a culture where everyone was "auntie" or "uncle" (it had the upside of making things easy for me, I never had to remember anyone's first name). My sister's kids (teenagers) call in-culture friends "auntie" and "uncle" and others by either "Miss Julie" and "Mr. John" or "Mrs. Smith" and "Mr. Smith", I guess depending on whatever the friends prefer. I haven't gotten to the point where calling friends anything is necessary, but this is probably how we'll do it, too.

[Anonymous]

My friend's children call me Ms/Miss FirstName and my daughter calls them Ms/Miss FirstName. Kids at school call me either Mrs. MyLastName or Mrs. MyHusband'sLastName depending on how well they know us. I did not change my name so the children of families who know us use my name and the children of families who don't know us well use my husband's last name. We have a few very close friends from school that we have known since preschool and their kids would call me Mary's Mom, as in, "Um, Mary's Mom? Could I have some more juice please?" And my daughter would do the same using their names. Those kids now call me Mrs MyLastName, but daughter still says PaulandSally's Mom. I always thought it was adorable so I am not correcting my child and I am a little sad that their kids are too grown up for it.

[Anonymous]

My son is 2.5, and so far he calls my friends by first names only... Mainly because he's only recently been able to even say their names (a bit of a late talker). Generally (especially for older kids), I think something besides first name is preferable, but I agree it depends on what the adult being addressed prefers. Kids do need to recognize a difference in how they address peers vs elders. Kids deserve respect, too, and adults aren't "better" than kids, but there is a difference. When I taught little kids a sport as a teenager, I was Miss Firstname. That is the convention I grew up with for things like soccer coach or ballet teacher. Neighbors, teachers, friends' parents, etc were Ms/Mr Lastname. I think I may have called some of my mom's close friends first name only bc they were fine with it.

[Anonymous]

We go by Ms. FirstName.

That's what they always did at preschool/daycare, so it caught on in general. I do have to remind DD though. She tends to default to just Firstname.

I prefer that other kids call me Ms. FirstName. Not a huge deal if it's just the FirstName, but it seems somewhat rude.

[Anonymous]

It was mostly first name in our circle until the kids got to school age, the moved to Mrs Lastname.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We go by Ms. FirstName.

That's what they always did at preschool/daycare, so it caught on in general. I do have to remind DD though. She tends to default to just Firstname.

I prefer that other kids call me Ms. FirstName. Not a huge deal if it's just the FirstName, but it seems somewhat rude.

I prefer Ms. First name. It seems too formal for a four year old to call me Mrs. Lastname, but too informal to just call me by my first name. I grew up calling other adult friends of my parents, Ms. Firstname. I will say it does annoy me when people present you to their kids as your first name. Then it puts me on the spot to correct them ...especially annoying if you reference that person to your kids as Ms. Firstname or Mrs. Lastname. I would say you start with formal and let the person give permission to use a more informal address.

[Anonymous]

Mrs. MyLastName or Mrs. DCsLastName (different).

Never Mrs.FirstName or just FirstName. I consider that rude and inappropriate.

[Anonymous]

I definitely struggle with this. I grew up (and still do) calling my friends' parents Mrs. Last Name, but it seems weird now having little kids call me that. I haven't really decided what to do about it.

[Anonymous]

Pretending my name is Jane Doe, the neighborhood kids call me: Mrs (or Ms) D.

[Anonymous]

When we moved to Nova, we noticed that Miss firstname seems to be the trend. I assumed it is a Southern thing. I'm from New England, and as a kid, we just used first names - none of my friends called adults that they knew well Ms first or lastname.