$1.2m -- Need more certainty

[Anonymous]

For good return on investment, there are only a few private schools in the area worth attending. That number you can count on a single hand. To go private for "private" sake doesn't make any sense unless your children have special needs and/or disabilities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:go public OP -- it's for people like you

What is up with the snobby, mean comments? OPs questions were perfectly legit. Perhaps some private school people feel threatened bc she is calling a spade a spade?

OP's problem is that she doesn't get it. She is trying to understand why rational people would spend a ton of money on an educational product that appears to her to be roughly equivalent to what a motivated student could get at a good Montgomery County public school. She's worried about having "public school buyer's remorse" at some point in the future.

She's asking for "more certainty" and she won't get it here or anywhere.

The comments about public school being "the place for people like her", while cruel are probably good advice. If you don't know and appreciate the differences, then why pay a lot more? The answer is you shouldn't.

We sent our boys to private elementary schools and high schools after some experience with the public schools. As soon as we put our first boy into a private and understood the full extent of the difference, we moved the other boys into private schools as quickly we could.

They had wonderful experiences, academically, socially and athletically.

I have seen people with spreadsheets and clipboards at private school open houses trying yo compare the schools on some sort of objective basis. It's a fool's errand. You can't quantify the quality of the experience.

[Anonymous]

Relatively poor private school parents on this board crow it's about fit over facts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
go public OP -- it's for people like you

Probably right on advice if your children don't have special needs and/or disabilities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:go public OP -- it's for people like you

What is up with the snobby, mean comments? OPs questions were perfectly legit. Perhaps some private school people feel threatened bc she is calling a spade a spade?

OP's problem is that she doesn't get it. She is trying to understand why rational people would spend a ton of money on an educational product that appears to her to be roughly equivalent to what a motivated student could get at a good Montgomery County public school. She's worried about having "public school buyer's remorse" at some point in the future.

She's asking for "more certainty" and she won't get it here or anywhere.

The comments about public school being "the place for people like her", while cruel are probably good advice. If you don't know and appreciate the differences, then why pay a lot more? The answer is you shouldn't.

We sent our boys to private elementary schools and high schools after some experience with the public schools. As soon as we put our first boy into a private and understood the full extent of the difference, we moved the other boys into private schools as quickly we could.

They had wonderful experiences, academically, socially and athletically.

I have seen people with spreadsheets and clipboards at private school open houses trying yo compare the schools on some sort of objective basis. It's a fool's errand. You can't quantify the quality of the experience.

Op here -- thanks for an attempt to bring this debate to a higher level (I know I contributed to its demise). What differences did you see in public v. private?

To add more info -- we absolutely intended to go private. I screwed up the redshirting issue and had to put my DD somewhere (DS is late summer birthday, oldest child, not very mature, but no learning disabilities). Much to my surprise, we loved the K public.

While I don't have a clip board, I am still struggling with whether the quality of experience is better.

I admit it is easy to say, I have the money, so why take the risk by going public. I am trying to resist that.

I am also struggling with the diversity issue -- see other threads.

Final point, that I didn't make earlier bc I know it would take the thread in a different direction -- if I thought my DS could get into Sidwell, we probably wouldn't be having this discussion. I don't feel the same way about any other school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:go public OP -- it's for people like you

What is up with the snobby, mean comments? OPs questions were perfectly legit. Perhaps some private school people feel threatened bc she is calling a spade a spade?

OP's problem is that she doesn't get it. She is trying to understand why rational people would spend a ton of money on an educational product that appears to her to be roughly equivalent to what a motivated student could get at a good Montgomery County public school. She's worried about having "public school buyer's remorse" at some point in the future.

She's asking for "more certainty" and she won't get it here or anywhere.

The comments about public school being "the place for people like her", while cruel are probably good advice. If you don't know and appreciate the differences, then why pay a lot more? The answer is you shouldn't.

We sent our boys to private elementary schools and high schools after some experience with the public schools. As soon as we put our first boy into a private and understood the full extent of the difference, we moved the other boys into private schools as quickly we could.

They had wonderful experiences, academically, socially and athletically.

I have seen people with spreadsheets and clipboards at private school open houses trying yo compare the schools on some sort of objective basis. It's a fool's errand. You can't quantify the quality of the experience.

Op here -- thanks for an attempt to bring this debate to a higher level (I know I contributed to its demise). What differences did you see in public v. private?

To add more info -- we absolutely intended to go private. I screwed up the redshirting issue and had to put my DD somewhere (DS is late summer birthday, oldest child, not very mature, but no learning disabilities). Much to my surprise, we loved the K public.

While I don't have a clip board, I am still struggling with whether the quality of experience is better.

I admit it is easy to say, I have the money, so why take the risk by going public. I am trying to resist that.

I am also struggling with the diversity issue -- see other threads.

Final point, that I didn't make earlier bc I know it would take the thread in a different direction -- if I thought my DS could get into Sidwell, we probably wouldn't be having this discussion. I don't feel the same way about any other school.

You need to access schools at all levels : lower elementary, upper elementary, middle, and high school. Public middle and high schools in these big school districts are more different than privates . Elementary levels are not . There are many students who flow out of public into private for high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not to hijack the thread, but responding to the recent posts, one should not assume that children are developing meaningful relationships with a diverse group of students simply because the student body is more diverse. Based on my experience, children have a much more integrated experience in private school than in public, meaning that children develop meaningful relationships across racial and socio-economic lines more in private schools. Before the flames start, I'm not saying there aren't exceptions, but I would be interested to hear whether kids at the public schools mentioned attend birthday parties that include a truly diverse group of kids or have play dates with a diverse group of kids. In my neighborhood for example, my DCs have the most diverse group of friends of any of the neighborhood kids and they are the only ones in private school.

Back to the topic - even though I have kids in private, I agree that given the cost of private school today, which is increasing with no end in sight, why jump on the bandwagon if public is working. If things change, you can reevaluate at that time.

I'd be very interested in hearing your definition of diversity and which private school(s) your children attend. Same for the many other DCUM posters who make similar comments. The top privates in this area are not truly diverse re academic performance, intellectual skills, or socio-economic status. If you're basing the "diverse experience" on race, color of skin, or country of origin, that's a limited view of the term diversity.

[Anonymous]

If I had that kind of money, I would do whatever I want with schooling. You are very well off.

[Anonymous]

If money is not an issue pick your flavor of school by whatever criteria.

If money is an option then return on investment becomes more of an issue.

[Anonymous]

DC is not at one of the top schools by reputation but DC is absolutely getting a top education. We were very disappointed with public by upper elementary. This was a DCPS school, by the way. So we switched. And are VERY happy. DC is thriving. We are not wealthy but it is worth every dime.

[Anonymous]

If your kid is happy in public K, just stay there. You will know if it becomes a bad fit. You can change at that time. If a kid is happy at a place, that is a very important thing. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

[Anonymous]

re Why "take the risk with public?" This strikes me as a crazy POV, at least given your demographic. The risk is mediocrity/complacency and, frankly, that risk is as great in a local private school as in your local publics. And if any of your DCs have special needs arguably the risk is higher in private. At this stage, I don't see how private protects you against the downside risks.

And I say this as someone who has chosen a private school for DC and who is in a similar economic position to your own.

I think that the only valid argument for private (when your alternative is high-performing and safe public schools and your DCs don't have special needs) is school- and kid-specific and it focuses on the upside. In other words, this school gives my DC something specific that s/he wouldn't otherwise have and that I value highly.

At the ES level, that can be harder to see than it will be in HS. What drew us to a particular private school was (hands-on) science early and often, a strong focus on communication skills (both writing and speaking), and foreign language instruction. And what sealed the deal was a pedagogical approach that was more oriented toward discovery and curiosity and defining one's own intellectual agenda than competition/grades/scores.

Do I feel that my DC has benefited from these things? Yes, absolutely. Both DH and I got a very good education in (different) public schools (and, I think, better education than public schools are able to provide today, given recent political trends). But DC is much better educated than we were at her age.

Does that mean that if DC had gone to public, she'd be hopelessly behind by HS (or earlier)? Hell no -- kids who initially went public enter her school all along the way and do well. And kids who stay in public throughout will still end up in the same colleges as DC and her classmates.

So why do we spend the money on private tuition? Because DC's school reinforces the intellectual values and priorities we have and that tend to be at odds with the mainstream.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:go public OP -- it's for people like you

What is up with the snobby, mean comments? OPs questions were perfectly legit. Perhaps some private school people feel threatened bc she is calling a spade a spade?

OP's problem is that she doesn't get it. She is trying to understand why rational people would spend a ton of money on an educational product that appears to her to be roughly equivalent to what a motivated student could get at a good Montgomery County public school. She's worried about having "public school buyer's remorse" at some point in the future.

She's asking for "more certainty" and she won't get it here or anywhere.

The comments about public school being "the place for people like her", while cruel are probably good advice. If you don't know and appreciate the differences, then why pay a lot more? The answer is you shouldn't.

We sent our boys to private elementary schools and high schools after some experience with the public schools. As soon as we put our first boy into a private and understood the full extent of the difference, we moved the other boys into private schools as quickly we could.

They had wonderful experiences, academically, socially and athletically.

I have seen people with spreadsheets and clipboards at private school open houses trying yo compare the schools on some sort of objective basis. It's a fool's errand. You can't quantify the quality of the experience.

Op here -- thanks for an attempt to bring this debate to a higher level (I know I contributed to its demise). What differences did you see in public v. private?

To add more info -- we absolutely intended to go private. I screwed up the redshirting issue and had to put my DD somewhere (DS is late summer birthday, oldest child, not very mature, but no learning disabilities). Much to my surprise, we loved the K public.

While I don't have a clip board, I am still struggling with whether the quality of experience is better.

I admit it is easy to say, I have the money, so why take the risk by going public. I am trying to resist that.

I am also struggling with the diversity issue -- see other threads.

Final point, that I didn't make earlier bc I know it would take the thread in a different direction -- if I thought my DS could get into Sidwell, we probably wouldn't be having this discussion. I don't feel the same way about any other school.

What differences?

The private schools we sent the boys to were much nicer environments for learning and living. They felt as if they were part of a family that included the staff, teachers, coaches and other students. We got to know the other parents and never had a concern about who they were with when they weren't at home. The values they heard in school were consistent with the ones they heard at home. As opposed to "enduring" their school years, they enjoyed them.

On diversity ... The diverse student bodies at public schools quickly and thoroughly self-segregate. Go look at a lunchroom in a MOCO public school and absorb what you see.

[Anonymous]

Seriously lady...you've already made up your mind so please don't "pretend argue". You know you want to save your money so send your kids to public. And, why not argue on the public school forum about this issue?

Anonymous wrote:Op here --

The comment about being "creepy" is pretty laughable.

I have not made up my mind. Wish I had -- would be sleeping better at night.

Comment about how "I belong in public" is also pretty ridiculous. I totally get that people who are in privates obviously feel it is the best option and want what is best for their kids, but really? Maybe your in the "tuition payments don't even hit my radar" camp -- if that is the case, congrats. I hope you situation never changes.

FWIW, we make 700k per year and have $4m in the bank, not including equity in our house. I am sorry for stooping to this -- some people bring the worst out of you. I drop in the bucket for some I am sure.

Point is that I didn't end up relatively well off by making decisions and spending a lot of money without solid facts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:On diversity ... The diverse student bodies at public schools quickly and thoroughly self-segregate. Go look at a lunchroom in a MOCO public school and absorb what you see.

+1000...this is so true....