Why do women who choose not to get an epidural feel they should be congratulated?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a 10lb baby without an epidural and on pit. I DO believe I deserve some kind of award! The nurses said I deserve one!

I agree with her. I've had the 10 lber, but the pit puts it into a whole other category for sure.[/quote

I have to give props to my nurses for this also! They were awesome at watching my ctx and saying..hey these are getting too intense and right on top of each other. They would turn the put down so it would slow down a little. The L&D nurses at VHC ROCK!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If someone told me they refused pain medication when they had multiple teeth extracted I would not congratulate them for being "tough"- I would think they were an idiot.

Of course. And if someone refused pain medication while they were having a c-section, I would agree. Vaginal birth is not surgery, though; for some people, the pain is manageable without medication. For some people it's not. Some people take ibuprofen for a hangnail; others pass kidney stones without it. Everyone's different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a 10lb baby without an epidural and on pit. I DO believe I deserve some kind of award! The nurses said I deserve one!

By choice?

Yep, by choice and I actually did it twice! First labor, water broke, no ctx so given put, labored for 28 hrs, pushed for only 10 mins. Second, induced so baby wouldn't get too big for vaginal delivery, given pit then water broken by doc, 7 hr labor pushed for 5 min.

I was kidding about feeling like I deserve an award (not joking that the nurses said it though). I am a serious wimp! Think slight panic attack when getting a splinter removed from foot type wimp! I was more afraid of the epi than anything else, but then found I could manage the pain by sitting forward in a glider and leaning on my DH. I also watched funny shows (I love Lucy episodes) and musicals (Chicago) while in active labor to keep me distracted. My nurse kept shaking her head when I was singing All that Jazz and Mr Cellophane....

I agree with this completely. I had to get a cerclage, and the needle in the spine for that surgery was more painful than most other things I'd endured before. And, I was completely nauseated by the meds and totally disoriented by seeing my legs but not being able to feel them. That gave me a pretty good idea about the option I was declining, which was quite useful.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, I wish i could manage a labor without an epi. I've known for a long time that i have low pain tolerance, and when my water broke i thought i was going to die from the pain. i got the epidural the very second it was offered to me, and i know that i'm going to have to do that with the next baby.

i have a lot of respect for women who can go without. because of my epi i couldn't move during labor, so at a certain point the baby's heart rate dropped severely and all the docs and nurses freaked out and i almost ended up in emergency C-section. turns out that as soon as someone moved me onto my side (because i couldn't move myself) the baby rebounded. without an epi i would have been moving a lot and this problem likely wouldn't have occurred.

so yea, a big congrats to the women who can handle it without an epidural. i wish i was as tough as you..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If someone told me they refused pain medication when they had multiple teeth extracted I would not congratulate them for being "tough"- I would think they were an idiot.

My mom has found that she prefers to go with no pain meds during dental procedures b/c she can handle the pain and avoids the after effects. She also had 3 kids with no epi's. Not an idiot, just different than you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't have an epidural, and I had my reasons but none of them included wanting a badge of honor. If a conversation comes up about natural child birth I never offer my story without being asked. I'm not smug. I don't look down on any person who chooses epidural or other drugs. We are not all like you describe.

i feel the same way. really, i never tell my story because no one wants to hear about it, which is fine with me. but i begin to wonder if it makes women who get epidurals feel bad, which begs the question... why do you care?

[Anonymous]

I had an epidural with my first, and when I have my second, I fully intend to try to go without it.. I won't be here (or anywhere else) asking for congratulations.. I will be doing it to prevent the complications I had during my last experience in hopes that they won't cause another emergency C-section..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No woman who labors without an epi expects to be congratulated by you. You are aggrandizing yourself if you think you are at all part of their plan.

I had my own reasons for going without an epi. My husband was grateful to me for enduring the labor. We were joyful and celebratory. You were not a speck of dust in the room of our joy.

My husband was grateful to me for enduring each of me three labors - including the two with lovely, blissful, complication-free epidurals. We were joyful and celebratory. You were not a speck of dust in the room of our (comfortable) joy.

Yeah, and the difference is, I do not think I was part of your plan. I am not questioning your decision with the claim that you did it to get a medal.

Seriously.

I'm always so curious why people say this is about comfort, as if everyone's idea of comfort is identical. To me, being confined to a bed, catheterized, on an IV, and denied food and drink for 24 hours after having a needle stuck into my spine is a bazillion times worse than the labor pains, which I managed well with movement, massage, and the cocktail of hormones the body releases naturally during labor.

It's not for everyone. But it was for me. And while I wouldn't call it as comfortable, as, say, a relaxing bubble bath, I highly preferred it to the alternative. While I do think it is healthier for baby, btw, this was only a small part of why I made the decision I made. It WAS about my comfort. As a bonus, as soon as I had my child, I was walking around and had no swelling or complications from any IV or meds. For my family, the benefits of our decision were much more immediate - no congratulations necessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had an epidural with my first, and when I have my second, I fully intend to try to go without it.. I won't be here (or anywhere else) asking for congratulations.. I will be doing it to prevent the complications I had during my last experience in hopes that they won't cause another emergency C-section..

exactly! this is first on my mind when i hear women say "i loved my epidural" after describing some horrible birth experiences. they don't draw that connection.

[Anonymous]

They don't. Sounding pretty defensive, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If someone told me they refused pain medication when they had multiple teeth extracted I would not congratulate them for being "tough"- I would think they were an idiot.

Of course. And if someone refused pain medication while they were having a c-section, I would agree. Vaginal birth is not surgery, though; for some people, the pain is manageable without medication. For some people it's not. Some people take ibuprofen for a hangnail; others pass kidney stones without it. Everyone's different.

And every labor is different. You just don't know.

[Anonymous]

I actually had a very easy epidural/pitocin delivery. I know myself well enough that going drug-free wasn't an option though I'd hoped to labor as long as I could without an epi. A few complications threw that plan in the garbage but in the end, I only pushed for 20 mins. I know people have different pain tolerances but I'm still impressed with women who do it drug-free.

[Anonymous]

Remember, no matter what you choose, it's the right choice, and anyone who chose differently from you is just WRONG!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If someone told me they refused pain medication when they had multiple teeth extracted I would not congratulate them for being "tough"- I would think they were an idiot.

If someone told me they refused pain medication for tooth extraction because they were planning to have multiple pregnancies and wanted to avoid the possible complications of multiple c-sections, I'd think they were crazy. Now, if they refused an epi for the same reason, I'd think it was one of the possible good choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I wish i could manage a labor without an epi. I've known for a long time that i have low pain tolerance, and when my water broke i thought i was going to die from the pain. i got the epidural the very second it was offered to me, and i know that i'm going to have to do that with the next baby.

i have a lot of respect for women who can go without. because of my epi i couldn't move during labor, so at a certain point the baby's heart rate dropped severely and all the docs and nurses freaked out and i almost ended up in emergency C-section. turns out that as soon as someone moved me onto my side (because i couldn't move myself) the baby rebounded. without an epi i would have been moving a lot and this problem likely wouldn't have occurred.

so yea, a big congrats to the women who can handle it without an epidural. i wish i was as tough as you..

i'm a pain wimp too, but my second came with almost no epidural because it all happened so fast. i still squeezed it in at the last minute but i was 9 cm and it basically just helped me push with dulled pain. i was impressed with my own ability to make it through that far without meds. maybe you will too!