What will going to "the best" elementary/high school/AAP ultimately mean for your child's future?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, and they will also have to get a job and their own apartment and learn to drive a car, but we don't expect them to do that at age 8.

Of course not, though it doesn't necessarily get easier for a child to interact with peers if he or she's been coddled throughout her pre-teen years (not saying that's what you've done).

[Anonymous]

What do you mean by "coddled"? If your child was being bullied and teased by her peers in her classroom and the school would/could do little about it, what do you do? if you've done the coaching and the social skills training and talked ad nauseum about it and your child is still miserable, do you think it is "coddling" to seek out an environment where they will be happier?

she's been coddled throughout her pre-teen years

I think it is actually much easier for these kids in MS and HS and certainly in college and beyond. You aren't with the same kids all day long. You have more freedom to choose who to hang out with, who to eat lunch with. You don't have the social mayhem that is recess and who gets left out with no one to play with to deal with. I was quirky like my DD in elementary school and I was beyond miserable. But we lived in Nowheresville Midwest and the only thing that taught me was there was no way I wanted to go back there once I was in college. HS was better, but college was heaven. Once I was free to choose my own classes and my own social groups, it was like a whole new world opened up.

But in ES, the kids get few choices. If they don't click socially with the kids in their school, then all the coaching in the world may not overcome that. And a lot of self esteem issues can be created in the meantime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As others have said, it's not about the best school, it's about the best school for the child.
Sending a child to the GT/AAP program is not about prestige, it's about helping a child to learn in the best way he/she can. Most kids can learn in the ways that most teachers teach. Students on either end of the "intelligence" spectrum frequently need specially trained teachers to challenge them in appropriate ways.
I have a friend whose child has Down's Syndrome. She is a strong advocate for her child in the school system. It seems that every year she has to fight to ensure that her child is in an appropriate educational setting. She does this because she knows how important the right teaching methods are to her child's progress, and her child deserves the best education possible!
Identifying students who cannot truly learn and grow in the regular classroom and providing teachers who have been trained in the best methods to help these students is what AAP is all about. It's simply about trying to teach each child in the best way for that child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It's almost a badge of honor that a child has few or no friends in a regular classrrom

I am the 11:29 poster from the previous page. Seriously? You have NO IDEA what I go through as a parent every.single.freaking.day trying to help my child with her social struggles.

She's had umpteen evaluations. She's been in therapy off and on for years to help her cope with the anxiety and self esteem issues from this. She's done a formal, private social skills group at $$$$ that insurance did NOT cover. She is in a social skills group at school. She does counselor lunch bunches. Her teachers work with her in the time they have. She is in Girl Scouts. She takes piano and loves drama. We cultivate pop culture interests despite my thinking it is pathetic, but I hope that stuff like having a DS and a Wii, listening to Taylor Swift and watching drivel like The Suite Life will give her things in common with other girls. We have started trying medication so now we add a psychiatrist to the mix.

And no, it isn't us as parents, because her younger sibling is not like this. Her sister is popular and makes friends easily, which really only makes the self esteem issues so much harder for her older sister. You have NO IDEA what it is like to have the kid that others don't like. Who feels different and excluded. She IS different and quirky. She's also smart, loving and funny. In her base school there was NO ONE like her. NO ONE. In the center, she has friends and teachers who get her to some extent. It's not perfect, but it's a vast improvement.

Until you've walked a mile in my shoes and lived the life of a parent of a kid with special needs, just keep it to yourself.

[list] It sounds to me she is a perfect match with the AAP kids. You should do everything you can to get her in the program!

[Anonymous]

PP, my child is a 5th grader and is already in the center.

[Anonymous]

I think your kid genuinely learns more, learns more problem solving skills and creative approaches that will help them in life. Gets to be surrounded by smart kids for peers, is intellectually nurtured, and that all of this, yes, will ultimately contribute to making her a more competitive, well educated, well paid person, which hopefully will contribute to her safety, security and happiness in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think your kid genuinely learns more, learns more problem solving skills and creative approaches that will help them in life. Gets to be surrounded by smart kids for peers, is intellectually nurtured, and that all of this, yes, will ultimately contribute to making her a more competitive, well educated, well paid person, which hopefully will contribute to her safety, security and happiness in life.

[

list] This was a good post but it is turned into another "my kids the smartest in the world" post . Hey all I can say is good luck to you and may your children turn out to be good in spite of yourself. You all are a mess! If you have no self confidence how do you expect your child to have it. You all are creating anxiety ridden children who most will amount to nothing more than a therapist patient.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP, my child is a 5th grader and is already in the center.

[list] Oh, I am so glad!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think your kid genuinely learns more, learns more problem solving skills and creative approaches that will help them in life. Gets to be surrounded by smart kids for peers, is intellectually nurtured, and that all of this, yes, will ultimately contribute to making her a more competitive, well educated, well paid person, which hopefully will contribute to her safety, security and happiness in life.

[

list] This was a good post but it is turned into another "my kids the smartest in the world" post . Hey all I can say is good luck to you and may your children turn out to be good in spite of yourself. You all are a mess! If you have no self confidence how do you expect your child to have it. You all are creating anxiety ridden children who most will amount to nothing more than a therapist patient.

Don't really get what you are saying here. Being well educated and well paid do NOT contribute to happiness and security?

I think money does not buy happiness, but lack of money does cause misery.

[Anonymous]

I recall seeing a documentary about a girl from inner city New York who was taken out of poor public schooling and received her middle and high school education at an academy that had the goal of providing a strong educational environment for inner city kids. The girl missed hanging out with her old friends at first, as she had structured activities and did her homework at school until 6 pm or so each day. Gradually she had less in common with the old peers and more with the new. Upon graduation, she had already been accepted by a college and was contemplating career paths. None of her old friends planned to go to college, nor did they seem to have any sort of guidance about the future.

That documentary drove home that education and peer groups absolutely help to shape the future for our kids. There's no guarantee regarding success in terms of who's going to be a future CEO, etc. But the right environment certainly can help to motivate kids to achieve their own true potential.