How am I going to afford a baby??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:did you just realize that childcare in this area is highly expensive?

I had no idea until I got pregnant, personally. Who talks about daycare costs besides parents & parents-to-be? I guess that makes me an uneducated idiot who got knocked up without considering all the consequences

Well...yes, kind of.

I'm guessing for other major life decisions you had an idea of the cost or researched such costs beforehand? Buying a house, getting married, etc. Why in the world would you get pregnant (assuming this isn't a huge surprise baby) without an idea of the costs associated with have such baby?

Yeah. Parenthood is expensive. I don't really feel bad if you are just realizing this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:did you just realize that childcare in this area is highly expensive?

I had no idea until I got pregnant, personally. Who talks about daycare costs besides parents & parents-to-be? I guess that makes me an uneducated idiot who got knocked up without considering all the consequences

Well...yes, kind of.

I'm guessing for other major life decisions you had an idea of the cost or researched such costs beforehand? Buying a house, getting married, etc. Why in the world would you get pregnant (assuming this isn't a huge surprise baby) without an idea of the costs associated with have such baby?

Not the poster you're quoting, but agree with her completely.

I knew that childcare was expensive here, but I honestly did not know HOW expensive until I was pregnant. And even so, my big reality check was the availability (or lack thereof) and not the sticker shock of the care. I know, I know, home daycare, nannies, etc. But you would think that in a city this big, there would be more childcare centers. The waiting lists at the center we eventually got into and the 2 waiting lists we are still on 16 months later sure indicate that there is demand!

[Anonymous]

I decided to stay home since my entire paycheck would have gone to childcare. Granted, I'm still in my 20's so I'm not making the salaries of others but I was still making a fair salary and we had to really look a how much things were.

I think buying second hand just comes with time. I never shopped at the stores I do now but you quickly prioritize. With #1 almost everything was new, with #2 things are 'new' but not from the store. Craigslist is an awesome place & consignment/yard sales are your friend. Again, I was never that way and now I am My friends were shocked at my 'dream' nursery and everything was under $500 total and you'd think it was more like $5,000...but we shopped around and made things we wanted rather than buying new.

It's not easy but it's extremely rewarding. It's amazing how a 49cent box of crayons lasts for hours and hours. You make cutbacks and we're living more on the edge now than we did before. Our savings isn't quite like it was, eating out is more the dollar menu and I haven't bought new clothes in ages but still have a very trendy closet thanks to my pre-child years.

The smiles and excitement my husband and I get far outweigh a hefty savings account...but it's also about perspective. We'd do anything for our kids which isn't how everyone thinks.

[Anonymous]

And I hate to say it...preschools are worse than childcare! Who knew my 2 year old's tuition is just about what we paid per semester for my husbands master's degree...and he just finished so it's not looking back!

[Anonymous]

preschools are worse than childcare!

ditto! I was absolutely shocked to find out the cost (for most places I wanted to send DD at least and that had reasonable coverage vs. a church-based program that's just a few hrs during the school yr) of preschool!

[Anonymous]

"The smiles and excitement my husband and I get far outweigh a hefty savings account...but it's also about perspective. We'd do anything for our kids which isn't how everyone thinks. "

Oh, brother! Where do we send your martyr award?

[Anonymous]

We have been saving for the last four years so that we have a decent enough baby fund to pay for things. Plus we put off buying a house (who says you can't raise a baby in an apartment?). We have one car that is 13 years old and we do one vacation a year (that we save up for and pay in cash). We paid of all our CC debt and I am working a job that allows me to have low student loan payments (and they will be forgiven in 9 years). I am not one of those people to say it will just all work out, but I am kind of an over planner ha ha

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"The smiles and excitement my husband and I get far outweigh a hefty savings account...but it's also about perspective. We'd do anything for our kids which isn't how everyone thinks. "

Oh, brother! Where do we send your martyr award?

You must be one of the ones that puts yourself before the child. My husband and I choose to put our children first which means our savings account has taken a hit- I'm not working so we're clearly not putting extra cash in it. We don't judge you so don't judge us. I started my 401k at 22 with 15-20% going there...clearly not working I've had to stop this.

I have friends that cut the feet off pj's despite the kids foot being too big and they're in the latest clothes, manis, pedis and going on exotic vacas. We choose to put the kids first- I'll be damned if my kids are in ghetto clothes while I'm dressed to the nine. As I said...perspective. There's also no way in hell I'm giving my 2 year old a $30,000 birthday party (TLC) or spending thousands on pageants (Toddlers and Tiaras) because she needs things. No, you make decisions that are for your family...we just choose to use the clothes we have and only buy what we need so we can afford preschool and saving at least something for college.

[Anonymous]

We're cheap people generally, so we saved up a lot of money before we had DS so that we would have a cushion. We take full advantage of the day care savings account (up to $5000 per family tax free) that DH's job offers. We don't go out much because DS is not well behaved in restaurants, and we don't want to leave him with a babysitter (we feel like he should spend the time we are not at work with us, or maybe once in a while with a grandparent).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"The smiles and excitement my husband and I get far outweigh a hefty savings account...but it's also about perspective. We'd do anything for our kids which isn't how everyone thinks. "

Oh, brother! Where do we send your martyr award?

You must be one of the ones that puts yourself before the child. My husband and I choose to put our children first which means our savings account has taken a hit- I'm not working so we're clearly not putting extra cash in it. We don't judge you so don't judge us. I started my 401k at 22 with 15-20% going there...clearly not working I've had to stop this.

I have friends that cut the feet off pj's despite the kids foot being too big and they're in the latest clothes, manis, pedis and going on exotic vacas. We choose to put the kids first- I'll be damned if my kids are in ghetto clothes while I'm dressed to the nine. As I said...perspective. There's also no way in hell I'm giving my 2 year old a $30,000 birthday party (TLC) or spending thousands on pageants (Toddlers and Tiaras) because she needs things. No, you make decisions that are for your family...we just choose to use the clothes we have and only buy what we need so we can afford preschool and saving at least something for college.

Oh.my god. Please.take.a.writing.course.