| At my kid's private school, the kids all know the landscape. They know the wealthy donor kids, the smart questbridge kids, the recruited athletes, etc. They all talk so they know who is applying to which schools. It's a general awareness vs resentment. My kid had 2 top choice schools, but shifted focus to the school with fewer high profile kids applying. Applying from a private is an advantage in itself. And I say this as a grateful middle class family that receives financial aid at our private school. |
| Run your own race and see what happens. Apply to other places too. Good luck. |
| Yes, the rich are more privileged. Good life lesson for your kid. |
What is your threshold for middle class? |
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Your kid needs to pick a different college.
Private school parent here who has seen this play out many times. Your kid is not getting a spot. |
| It's not "rigged" if other classmates are more attractive candidates for whaterever it is they bring to the table in in addition to what your kid brings. |
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Pivot to choice #2. This is how it works at top privates and is the "risk" you take when attending.
At ours Princeton was off the table this year. The spots were 100% locked down by legacies, donors and athletes. Yale was wide open. The unhooked, very top kids applied to Yale SCEA and got in. Next year Princeton looks to be open. The landscape changes every admission year. |
The barriers have always been there, this is nothing new. Elite schools have never been open armed towards the lower classes….it is more like ‘limited access’ for a few who can contribute. Want a superior education look to an elite SLAC. The R1 model is focused on graduate school, not undergraduate education. |
Nobody lost out to the ‘athletes’. The athletes brought something valuable that you kid didn’t. They likely would not have been admitted in any situation. |
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At our nonDMV private, top stat unhooked apply here early:
Northwestern, Penn (CAS), JHU, Uchicago (if full pay only), Cornell, Columbia, Rice, WashU, CMU, Emory Amherst, Pomona, CMC, Davidson Good luck! |
Yep |
| It’s hard but you have the info you need to have a good discussion with your kid about what to do, given the reality. Ie come up with a brutally balanced list. Lots of EAs. Don’t buy into the dream school concept, I’m sorry but it sounds like you might be. You cannot do that. You stay positive and help guide back to their ownership of the plan. |
At least you aren't blaming a URM like most on DCUM do. |
| And know it is generally harder for girls than boys because colleges are trying to balance class gender. So if boy legacies or donors or athletes are ahead of her, absolutely pivot. |
| Correct. |