Why do people brag about their 7 year olds skiing blacks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unpopular opinion

I think a lot of this is just perspective. When parents mention their kids skiing blacks, it’s usually pride in something their child worked up to. But almost any accomplishment can sound like bragging if someone is inclined to hear it that way. After all, someone else could just as easily say that mentioning a second home in Jackson or Breck or kids skiing since age 3 could sound like bragging too - it really depends on the listener.

I think it's more complex than this. Sometimes people are just proud. Sometimes they are proud AND being competitive. Sometimes they are not competitive at all but are being tone deaf or lacking in self awareness. It's really case by case. People with a lot of emotional intelligence will rarely be accused of bragging or competing because they will often just know how to read a room and adjust their conversation accordingly. The people who tend to annoy others and be accused of bragging may not truly be bragging, but they often lack self awareness and haven't made enough effort to think about how their comments will be received, they only think about how they will feel to say whatever it is they have to say.

If people put as much effort into self-awareness and learning to read a room (otherwise known as "manners") as they do into their kids' skiing lessons and earning enough to buy a second home in Jackson Hole, we'd have fewer threads like this. Alas, knowing how to talk to people is increasingly a lost art.

Can you explain to me what’s going on in this room that we’re reading where saying my kids ski blacks is such a brag that this room needs to be read.

You realize they’re not doing jumps with double backflips or skiing gates right?

A little kid on blacks just means they are small and they fall a shorter distance.

Tell me an eighty-year-old is on a black that’s impressive.

Why are you so defensive?

Some people may not be interested in your kid's skiing ability. Other people perhaps cannot afford ski trips, have unsporty kids who don't excel in sports, or just don't know enough about skiing to be able to converse on the subject beyond "oh, that's cool." If your goal is exclusively to make sure other people know about your vacation and your kid's skills, then you can talk to them however you want.

But if your goal is to connect with other people and have positive social interactions, you might want to edit a bit.

It is entirely up to you.

It’s actually you that I think have a connection problem. I don’t have any problem with my friends connecting with me. If they ask me, how is my ski vacation? I tell them I don’t have to think about their income, what type of vacations they go on, I don’t have to place every word I say around my friends.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, I think it's about the parents being able to ski together with their kids without having to worry or plan out routes quite as carefully. I know my kids aren't quite there yet and I have to be careful that I don't take them down anything too steep or icy. I really look forward to them being slightly better so that we can just ski without having to worry about a short section of more difficult trail being too steep or narrow or icy for their skill level.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unpopular opinion

I think a lot of this is just perspective. When parents mention their kids skiing blacks, it’s usually pride in something their child worked up to. But almost any accomplishment can sound like bragging if someone is inclined to hear it that way. After all, someone else could just as easily say that mentioning a second home in Jackson or Breck or kids skiing since age 3 could sound like bragging too - it really depends on the listener.

I think it's more complex than this. Sometimes people are just proud. Sometimes they are proud AND being competitive. Sometimes they are not competitive at all but are being tone deaf or lacking in self awareness. It's really case by case. People with a lot of emotional intelligence will rarely be accused of bragging or competing because they will often just know how to read a room and adjust their conversation accordingly. The people who tend to annoy others and be accused of bragging may not truly be bragging, but they often lack self awareness and haven't made enough effort to think about how their comments will be received, they only think about how they will feel to say whatever it is they have to say.

If people put as much effort into self-awareness and learning to read a room (otherwise known as "manners") as they do into their kids' skiing lessons and earning enough to buy a second home in Jackson Hole, we'd have fewer threads like this. Alas, knowing how to talk to people is increasingly a lost art.

Can you explain to me what’s going on in this room that we’re reading where saying my kids ski blacks is such a brag that this room needs to be read.

You realize they’re not doing jumps with double backflips or skiing gates right?

A little kid on blacks just means they are small and they fall a shorter distance.

Tell me an eighty-year-old is on a black that’s impressive.

Why are you so defensive?

Some people may not be interested in your kid's skiing ability. Other people perhaps cannot afford ski trips, have unsporty kids who don't excel in sports, or just don't know enough about skiing to be able to converse on the subject beyond "oh, that's cool." If your goal is exclusively to make sure other people know about your vacation and your kid's skills, then you can talk to them however you want.

But if your goal is to connect with other people and have positive social interactions, you might want to edit a bit.

It is entirely up to you.

I'm not interested in your kids' ability at anything, honestly! But I will smile, nod my head in the appropriate way and act interested but inside I am rolling my eyes HARD and making a mental note about how annoying you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unpopular opinion

I think a lot of this is just perspective. When parents mention their kids skiing blacks, it’s usually pride in something their child worked up to. But almost any accomplishment can sound like bragging if someone is inclined to hear it that way. After all, someone else could just as easily say that mentioning a second home in Jackson or Breck or kids skiing since age 3 could sound like bragging too - it really depends on the listener.

I think it's more complex than this. Sometimes people are just proud. Sometimes they are proud AND being competitive. Sometimes they are not competitive at all but are being tone deaf or lacking in self awareness. It's really case by case. People with a lot of emotional intelligence will rarely be accused of bragging or competing because they will often just know how to read a room and adjust their conversation accordingly. The people who tend to annoy others and be accused of bragging may not truly be bragging, but they often lack self awareness and haven't made enough effort to think about how their comments will be received, they only think about how they will feel to say whatever it is they have to say.

If people put as much effort into self-awareness and learning to read a room (otherwise known as "manners") as they do into their kids' skiing lessons and earning enough to buy a second home in Jackson Hole, we'd have fewer threads like this. Alas, knowing how to talk to people is increasingly a lost art.

Can you explain to me what’s going on in this room that we’re reading where saying my kids ski blacks is such a brag that this room needs to be read.

You realize they’re not doing jumps with double backflips or skiing gates right?

A little kid on blacks just means they are small and they fall a shorter distance.

Tell me an eighty-year-old is on a black that’s impressive.

Why are you so defensive?

Some people may not be interested in your kid's skiing ability. Other people perhaps cannot afford ski trips, have unsporty kids who don't excel in sports, or just don't know enough about skiing to be able to converse on the subject beyond "oh, that's cool." If your goal is exclusively to make sure other people know about your vacation and your kid's skills, then you can talk to them however you want.

But if your goal is to connect with other people and have positive social interactions, you might want to edit a bit.

It is entirely up to you.

I'm not interested in your kids' ability at anything, honestly! But I will smile, nod my head in the appropriate way and act interested but inside I am rolling my eyes HARD and making a mental note about how annoying you are.

Why ask about someone’s vacation then not care? Just don’t ask.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unpopular opinion

I think a lot of this is just perspective. When parents mention their kids skiing blacks, it’s usually pride in something their child worked up to. But almost any accomplishment can sound like bragging if someone is inclined to hear it that way. After all, someone else could just as easily say that mentioning a second home in Jackson or Breck or kids skiing since age 3 could sound like bragging too - it really depends on the listener.

I think it's more complex than this. Sometimes people are just proud. Sometimes they are proud AND being competitive. Sometimes they are not competitive at all but are being tone deaf or lacking in self awareness. It's really case by case. People with a lot of emotional intelligence will rarely be accused of bragging or competing because they will often just know how to read a room and adjust their conversation accordingly. The people who tend to annoy others and be accused of bragging may not truly be bragging, but they often lack self awareness and haven't made enough effort to think about how their comments will be received, they only think about how they will feel to say whatever it is they have to say.

If people put as much effort into self-awareness and learning to read a room (otherwise known as "manners") as they do into their kids' skiing lessons and earning enough to buy a second home in Jackson Hole, we'd have fewer threads like this. Alas, knowing how to talk to people is increasingly a lost art.

This is really insightful. I’m sure I make a lot of comments about my kid that sound like bragging - but people who know me know that my kid has had a lot of struggles so I need to be positive about him when I can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unpopular opinion

I think a lot of this is just perspective. When parents mention their kids skiing blacks, it’s usually pride in something their child worked up to. But almost any accomplishment can sound like bragging if someone is inclined to hear it that way. After all, someone else could just as easily say that mentioning a second home in Jackson or Breck or kids skiing since age 3 could sound like bragging too - it really depends on the listener.

I think it's more complex than this. Sometimes people are just proud. Sometimes they are proud AND being competitive. Sometimes they are not competitive at all but are being tone deaf or lacking in self awareness. It's really case by case. People with a lot of emotional intelligence will rarely be accused of bragging or competing because they will often just know how to read a room and adjust their conversation accordingly. The people who tend to annoy others and be accused of bragging may not truly be bragging, but they often lack self awareness and haven't made enough effort to think about how their comments will be received, they only think about how they will feel to say whatever it is they have to say.

If people put as much effort into self-awareness and learning to read a room (otherwise known as "manners") as they do into their kids' skiing lessons and earning enough to buy a second home in Jackson Hole, we'd have fewer threads like this. Alas, knowing how to talk to people is increasingly a lost art.

This is really insightful. I’m sure I make a lot of comments about my kid that sound like bragging - but people who know me know that my kid has had a lot of struggles so I need to be positive about him when I can.

It’s probably just people over overhear these types of conversations that are so judgmental and wondering who cares about your kids skiing ability.

Your real friends do care.

[Anonymous]

This is peak (!) rich people problems here, and I am very much enjoying hearing about all these skiing-related conversational struggles.

[Anonymous]

Some people can’t be on social media cause they just get jealous. They have to label people on social media as narcissist or vain or full of themselves because they just can’t in their own bodies resolved the conflict they have with being jealous..

Hearing about other people’s vacations is exactly the same way.

I remember my kids would get back from spring break and kids would tell all these stories about going to the Swiss Alps or Italy or Dubai or some insane place for vacation. Most of the time we went nowhere for spring break. In hindsight, it was kind of good for my kids to learn how to listen to these stories and be happy for their friends and not having any jealousy.

Sure did I wish we could do this things for our kids every single solitary spring break and summer and Christmas I guess maybe not really that sounds like a lot of work and jet lag.

But I’ve never listened to any of these stories and thought what is wrong with these people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unpopular opinion

I think a lot of this is just perspective. When parents mention their kids skiing blacks, it’s usually pride in something their child worked up to. But almost any accomplishment can sound like bragging if someone is inclined to hear it that way. After all, someone else could just as easily say that mentioning a second home in Jackson or Breck or kids skiing since age 3 could sound like bragging too - it really depends on the listener.

I think it's more complex than this. Sometimes people are just proud. Sometimes they are proud AND being competitive. Sometimes they are not competitive at all but are being tone deaf or lacking in self awareness. It's really case by case. People with a lot of emotional intelligence will rarely be accused of bragging or competing because they will often just know how to read a room and adjust their conversation accordingly. The people who tend to annoy others and be accused of bragging may not truly be bragging, but they often lack self awareness and haven't made enough effort to think about how their comments will be received, they only think about how they will feel to say whatever it is they have to say.

If people put as much effort into self-awareness and learning to read a room (otherwise known as "manners") as they do into their kids' skiing lessons and earning enough to buy a second home in Jackson Hole, we'd have fewer threads like this. Alas, knowing how to talk to people is increasingly a lost art.

Can you explain to me what’s going on in this room that we’re reading where saying my kids ski blacks is such a brag that this room needs to be read.

You realize they’re not doing jumps with double backflips or skiing gates right?

A little kid on blacks just means they are small and they fall a shorter distance.

Tell me an eighty-year-old is on a black that’s impressive.

Why are you so defensive?

Some people may not be interested in your kid's skiing ability. Other people perhaps cannot afford ski trips, have unsporty kids who don't excel in sports, or just don't know enough about skiing to be able to converse on the subject beyond "oh, that's cool." If your goal is exclusively to make sure other people know about your vacation and your kid's skills, then you can talk to them however you want.

But if your goal is to connect with other people and have positive social interactions, you might want to edit a bit.

It is entirely up to you.

I'm not interested in your kids' ability at anything, honestly! But I will smile, nod my head in the appropriate way and act interested but inside I am rolling my eyes HARD and making a mental note about how annoying you are.

Why ask about someone’s vacation then not care? Just don’t ask.

I don't ask! But people brag about their kids all the time without being asked.
Oh, and a vacation? That I want to hear about. But about some little kid skiing??? Why would anyone other than Grandma even care?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unpopular opinion

I think a lot of this is just perspective. When parents mention their kids skiing blacks, it’s usually pride in something their child worked up to. But almost any accomplishment can sound like bragging if someone is inclined to hear it that way. After all, someone else could just as easily say that mentioning a second home in Jackson or Breck or kids skiing since age 3 could sound like bragging too - it really depends on the listener.

I think it's more complex than this. Sometimes people are just proud. Sometimes they are proud AND being competitive. Sometimes they are not competitive at all but are being tone deaf or lacking in self awareness. It's really case by case. People with a lot of emotional intelligence will rarely be accused of bragging or competing because they will often just know how to read a room and adjust their conversation accordingly. The people who tend to annoy others and be accused of bragging may not truly be bragging, but they often lack self awareness and haven't made enough effort to think about how their comments will be received, they only think about how they will feel to say whatever it is they have to say.

If people put as much effort into self-awareness and learning to read a room (otherwise known as "manners") as they do into their kids' skiing lessons and earning enough to buy a second home in Jackson Hole, we'd have fewer threads like this. Alas, knowing how to talk to people is increasingly a lost art.

This is really insightful. I’m sure I make a lot of comments about my kid that sound like bragging - but people who know me know that my kid has had a lot of struggles so I need to be positive about him when I can.

It’s probably just people over overhear these types of conversations that are so judgmental and wondering who cares about your kids skiing ability.

Your real friends do care.[/quote]

No, we really don't

[Anonymous]

It’s something their kid is good at. Just like people say my kid is doing travel soccer or whatever.

Let it go. People who are reading into this should spend their time on better things. Sure some parents like to brag but others are just proud of their kid and conveying it. And I would be happy for them just as I would be happy when my good friend says her kid is in a violin concert. Same thing.

BTW, my kid was doing easy blacks at 8 and at 9 doing harder blacks and bowls and love trees. He was in level 7 by 8 because he took lessons with instructors on the east coast. We also go skiing out west every year. Skiing is his thing and he just really picked it up. I’m not saying he is Olympic level at all but above average and the only sport I would say he is good at. No, I don’t say my kid does blacks, just that he likes to ski and it’s his best sport. But when I let him go skiing on his own with friends who he has not skied with, I do ask what the other kids can do so I tell him not to go on runs above their level.

I also agree that at 7 the kids doing real blacks are likely not in full control with good technique and just getting down

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This seems to be a thing in my social circle where the kids and parents are obsessive about skiing black or double black runs out West. My kids are competent skiers, have taken lessons and we ski several weeks a year (own a second home in Jackson) and we mostly do blues. I have 7 year old twins and I think it’s safer for this age. Skiing isn’t something I would push just to be able to say we do that.

Why do you care? God, you people will complain about anything.

[Anonymous]

Because they are insecure. It's not deeper than that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s something their kid is good at. Just like people say my kid is doing travel soccer or whatever.

Let it go. People who are reading into this should spend their time on better things. Sure some parents like to brag but others are just proud of their kid and conveying it. And I would be happy for them just as I would be happy when my good friend says her kid is in a violin concert. Same thing.

BTW, my kid was doing easy blacks at 8 and at 9 doing harder blacks and bowls and love trees. He was in level 7 by 8 because he took lessons with instructors on the east coast. We also go skiing out west every year. Skiing is his thing and he just really picked it up. I’m not saying he is Olympic level at all but above average and the only sport I would say he is good at. No, I don’t say my kid does blacks, just that he likes to ski and it’s his best sport. But when I let him go skiing on his own with friends who he has not skied with, I do ask what the other kids can do so I tell him not to go on runs above their level.

I also agree that at 7 the kids doing real blacks are likely not in full control with good technique and just getting down

Some people actually do not go into detail about their kid's sports prowess when talking to other people. My kid has an extra-curricular that she is very good at and while I always tell her how proud of her I am at home, when it comes up in conversation with other parents I just say she enjoys it and gets a lot out of it and never go into any specifics about her skill level because I don't think it really matters in that setting. I also don't bring it up unless directly asked. Same with academics. Sometimes my kids have academic areas they really excel in but that's a conversation for home or with a teacher, I'm not telling other parents randomly about how my kid is reading above level or participating in G&T programming or whatever because I just think it invites comparison and is unlikely to be a productive conversation.

People it can be appropriate to brag about your kid to: their grandparents, your spouse, a close friend who is heavily invested in your kid's happiness and success.

People it is rarely appropriate to brag about your kid to: the parents of other kids in the same age group, especially if part of the same school/team/neighborhood community.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some people can’t be on social media cause they just get jealous. They have to label people on social media as narcissist or vain or full of themselves because they just can’t in their own bodies resolved the conflict they have with being jealous..

Hearing about other people’s vacations is exactly the same way.

I remember my kids would get back from spring break and kids would tell all these stories about going to the Swiss Alps or Italy or Dubai or some insane place for vacation. Most of the time we went nowhere for spring break. In hindsight, it was kind of good for my kids to learn how to listen to these stories and be happy for their friends and not having any jealousy.

Sure did I wish we could do this things for our kids every single solitary spring break and summer and Christmas I guess maybe not really that sounds like a lot of work and jet lag.

But I’ve never listened to any of these stories and thought what is wrong with these people.

You're the best person. You have the best feelings. Everyone else is trash.