Tell me about meeting up with an old love years later

[Anonymous]

Even if you two don't have feelings for each other, no need to unnecessarily stir a pot. Find another engagement and excuse yourself from this meeting. That's not being rude, but being kind to yourself, him and your spouses.

[Anonymous]

Pots of your lives doesn't need this spice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Even if you two don't have feelings for each other, no need to unnecessarily stir a pot. Find another engagement and excuse yourself from this meeting. That's not being rude, but being kind to yourself, him and your spouses.

And if there are feelings, those feeling could still be there. Then afterwards you'll just feel worse. Like PP wrote, there is no good ending to meeting again so spare you and your spouses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Even if you two don't have feelings for each other, no need to unnecessarily stir a pot. Find another engagement and excuse yourself from this meeting. That's not being rude, but being kind to yourself, him and your spouses.

This.

Don't go looking for trouble.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I recently met up with my college girlfriend after about 25 years and it was a very positive experience. There were still powerful feelings there, but they are quite different now—its not about “i want to be with this person” or “I want sex with this person”, but there was a lot of warmth, connection, and shared history to revisit. We had some unanswered questions to talk through and both found it interesting to get the other person’s perspective on things. Not a threat to my marriage in any way, but I could see how it might be destabilizing if there are underlying problems in your marriage. I think a lot of it depends on the quality of the emotional connection you had with the person and the circumstances surrounding the end of the relationship, as well as whether you are actually happy about the person you ended up marrying.

PP I recently met up with my HS ex and I so fully agree with how you described this.

We are both married with kids and we don't live in the same area. We are not in close touch since meeting so it's not unseemly like some PPs are saying. But more like revisiting an important chapter of my own life and how it's shaped me.

+1. Another poster who had a very similar experience with a HS sweetheart. Despite some rough patches in his upbringing, he grew up to be a great guy and a family man. We talked about our parents - turned out he had a whole relationship with my mom; his mom died when he was young, his father was sort of neglectful, and apparently my mom stepped in with some practical advice and a little financial help occasionally. I had no idea about that.