Constant requests from kid

[Anonymous]

I think, coupled with all the great advice, a helpful idea would be to set aside time with your daughter to give attention. Crochet together, play a card game, etc. So while teaching her that she cannot "bother" you, you are also available to give her undivided attention. She's not too old to be read to. She's trying to find ways to occupy herself.

[Anonymous]

How are you communicating your role to her?

You are a SAHM of older kids— it’s actually not irrational of them to conclude that your “job” is taking care of their minutiae. Not polite and not, as you put it, very high EQ, but not irrational.

You want her to put herself in your shoes— she would probably say you have had “free time” all day while she goes to school, she needs (or feels she needs) things when she gets home, and you’re “mad” she even asks.

So first of all make sure her actual and academic needs (like a spelling list) are met, use your time wisely in meal prep, and then have a super direct response to her: “Larla, crochet supplies are in the downstairs closet. I am focused on helping your brother with his homework right now, your choices are get them yourself or I will get to this tomorrow” and brook absolutely no argument.

The more you jump when she says jump the more you reinforce this.