9yr old girls left home alone at sleepover

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s no dad in the picture who was home? No supervision at all?

The dad was at work.

WFH?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's no big deal. They're 9! If the parent had just left, it's not an issue to me.

Are you kidding? You show up to pick up from a sleepover and find two girls alone. The mom has gone to the gym or to get a facial or some other self-centered unnecessary errand that will take at least an hour. Not an issue?

Or is there more to the story - like maybe the OP was supposed to pick up from the sleepover by 8:30 or something and the mom was fed up?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m surprised by the replies in here actually. 9yo are 4th/5th grade absolutely capable of being home alone.

It’s not about being capable. It’s about being respectful of other people. This is not cool with 9 year olds.
Some 6 year olds might be capable of being home alone. But if you’ve invited my 6yo over I’m gonna assume there is an adult in the house.

[Anonymous]

I’d assume the mom is working out in a home gym or the dad is working in a home office. Available for emergencies but not available to chat to you. Still not okay but better than left home alone.

[Anonymous]

I do this with my boys but they are teenagers.

I have an 8yo and would never leave her alone with friends.

[Anonymous]

You lost me at theirselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's no big deal. They're 9! If the parent had just left, it's not an issue to me.

Are you kidding? You show up to pick up from a sleepover and find two girls alone. The mom has gone to the gym or to get a facial or some other self-centered unnecessary errand that will take at least an hour. Not an issue?

Or is there more to the story - like maybe the OP was supposed to pick up from the sleepover by 8:30 or something and the mom was fed up?

Yeah, again the girls are nine. Not three.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah I would say something. Whether you want that something to be a confrontation initiated by you or a simple "the girls can only sleepover at our house from now on so that I can feel comfortable in the supervision" the next time she's invited to spend the night is up to you.

The latter response is super passive aggressive- do not do that.

Look, it’s 100% legal for 9yos to be home alone for short periods, but very odd for the mom to just up and leave without asking if you’re comfortable with that scenario or even saying she would be out when you arrived.

Just talk to the mom about it and/or don’t let your daughter sleep over there again

[Anonymous]

It isn’t a huge deal to me but I would have wanted to have been told. Then I could check in more often during the hour they were alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d assume the mom is working out in a home gym or the dad is working in a home office. Available for emergencies but not available to chat to you. Still not okay but better than left home alone.

Except that’s not what happened here. Both parents were gone.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, I wouldn’t care

[Anonymous]

I’m really surprised at how many people are totally fine with this, given the other things DCUM posters get up in arms about.

I have another question then. At what age can kids take a small to medium size dog (15-20 lb dog) for a walk alone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree she shouldn’t have left the girls alone without asking you, but I don’t think it’s a reason to go nuclear. If it’s a good friend of dd and you have a good relationship with the mom, I would just say something like “would you mind giving me a heads up if you’re going to need to be out, the kids can play at my house instead.” You can be self-deprecating about being overprotective. I bet she apologizes.

Yes, I agree with this. I noticed my neighbor would leave when my kid was invited over there and my daughter confirmed she left them alone. I just said to let me know so I could keep an eye out. In your case she could just let you know so you could pick up earlier.

You’re both ridiculous - not when the girls at nine.

Going to the gym is such a frivolous reason when a 9 year old is sleeping over and you’re the only adult. I’d maybe understanding running to the store to get milk or doing a quick drive thru donut run or something quick for the girls. But the gym?

I don’t understand the logic of donuts being less frivolous than the gym.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree she shouldn’t have left the girls alone without asking you, but I don’t think it’s a reason to go nuclear. If it’s a good friend of dd and you have a good relationship with the mom, I would just say something like “would you mind giving me a heads up if you’re going to need to be out, the kids can play at my house instead.” You can be self-deprecating about being overprotective. I bet she apologizes.

Yes, I agree with this. I noticed my neighbor would leave when my kid was invited over there and my daughter confirmed she left them alone. I just said to let me know so I could keep an eye out. In your case she could just let you know so you could pick up earlier.

You’re both ridiculous - not when the girls at nine.

Going to the gym is such a frivolous reason when a 9 year old is sleeping over and you’re the only adult. I’d maybe understanding running to the store to get milk or doing a quick drive thru donut run or something quick for the girls. But the gym?

I don’t understand the logic of donuts being less frivolous than the gym.

At least it’s for the kids and the errand is a 10 minute one instead of an hr+

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m really surprised at how many people are totally fine with this, given the other things DCUM posters get up in arms about.

I have another question then. At what age can kids take a small to medium size dog (15-20 lb dog) for a walk alone?

Age 8 if the dog is well behaved and the kid is responsible and it’s a generally nice neighborhood.

I’ve had the Op situation happen but the mom texted me and said “I need to leave at 8 for something — I’m okay letting the girls finish breakfast alone if you’re okay with that but if not can you pick her up by 8? Thanks!” For a short period of time in a safe neighborhood and responsible 9 year olds I would be okay with it but would appreciate the ask.