We butt heads over this aspect of vacation

[Anonymous]

Do not go again

It’s vacation

I never understand people who do this it’s mot vacation

Team DH

[Anonymous]

There are a lot of hard things about my marriage but I’m glad this isn’t one of them because idk how you resolve this and I can see getting really bogged down in this kind of dispute.

But actually I think maybe this feels unfamiliar because you have give and take on this stuff and in this case, if I am the Sandwiches From Home spouse and we agreed on the budget, you have to let the food choices go if they’re in the budget. You can’t be standing there claiming that skipping out on the continental breakfast to get waffles is extravagant if it’s in the budget. That’s so arbitrary! It would have been cheaper to stay at the Super 8 and eat Poptarts. Or stay home. You’re just asking everyone to adhere to your own arbitrary standard of wastefulness for no reason other than it’s your own and you like it. That’s not fair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We just returned from our “big” summer vacation, where we let loose and spoil ourselves. We budget for this trip and work it into our finances so the cost of the trip isn’t noticeable. We plan on taking a shorter, long-weekend road trip later this summer just to get away again before school. While lodging and activities aren’t a problem, it gets crazy when DH wants to spend a fortune on food and drinks just because we are on “vacation”. Where I am like, let’s pack ablations and snacks to have on the balcony or poolside, DH is more let’s just splurge on $15 cocktails from the pool bar and order an equally overpriced app from the restaurant. Or, the hotel has a made to order breakfast included, but he wants to try the fancy breakfast place where we will drop $100 on pancakes. At the end of the day it probably doesn’t matter, but it feels needlessly expensive, especially on a road trip where we could pack anything we need, or where a decent breakfast is available.

What’s the happy medium? How would you discuss this with him?

Well, I am him. Calories and money don't count on vacation.

+1 especially if you budget for it.

Of course the happy medium is simply talking about it. Compromise. Not every drink has to be poolside and you don’t need $100 pancakes every meal. Let him choose his splurges like 2 poolside cocktails a day and one fancy breakfast in bed.

[Anonymous]

I’m team DH.
I think what drives me most crazy with this is that we are a family who normally gets takeout or eats out a few times a month and DH and I will order cocktails with dinner or go out for cocktails sometimes.
It drives me crazy that all of a sudden, on vacation, we are subsisting solely on Raisin Bran, bananas, and PB&J.

[Anonymous]

He doesn't want to hear you discuss this, Op -- that's part of The Vacation