Guys who do all the cooking — do they expect something in return?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most professional chefs are men. Why is it men cooking at home is considered weird?

I didn’t know it was. Where are you getting that?

Np. I think a lot of our dads and grandpas never cooked. Women weren’t allowed to work and often were SAHMs so obviously they would do more cooking. Now that men and women work, I do think most millennial men cook.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some men like to cook. Usually they are very controlling.

I've never put those two together, but the man I know who liked to cook was very controlling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most professional chefs are men. Why is it men cooking at home is considered weird?

I didn’t know it was. Where are you getting that?

Np. I think a lot of our dads and grandpas never cooked. Women weren’t allowed to work and often were SAHMs so obviously they would do more cooking. Now that men and women work, I do think most millennial men cook.

That was just circumstance, not weird. With a side helping of gatekeeping and learned helplessness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most professional chefs are men. Why is it men cooking at home is considered weird?

I didn’t know it was. Where are you getting that?

Np. I think a lot of our dads and grandpas never cooked. Women weren’t allowed to work and often were SAHMs so obviously they would do more cooking. Now that men and women work, I do think most millennial men cook.

My dad always cooked, and he made all the money. My mom did everything else. My brother cooks for his family; he and his wife both work and earn similar incomes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some men like to cook. Usually they are very controlling.

Yep, exactly! I've never seen a man who likes to cook who wasn't somewhat emotionally abusive. It's definitely a red flag for a controlling personality. Just keep an eye out for the other things he insists on controlling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some men like to cook. Usually they are very controlling.

Yep, exactly! I've never seen a man who likes to cook who wasn't somewhat emotionally abusive. It's definitely a red flag for a controlling personality. Just keep an eye out for the other things he insists on controlling.

What!! I am so confused by these comments. Men who cook, in my experience, just like making other people happy and tend to be very caring.

Men who criticize what others eat and insist on only cooking/eating certain foods? That’s a different story, of course. But I’m not seeing the connection with just “cooking.”

[Anonymous]

DH does the cooking and helps with the dishes. He thinks this absolves him of all other housework. It’s a source of contention because I’d gladly cook if it meant I didn’t have to do laundry or clean up anything else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My girlfriend hates to shop/cook but loves good food, so she thinks she hit the jackpot with me, who is very happy doing all that. But it’s not like I don’t expect her to pull her weight in other areas — for instance, she makes a ton of money and I can’t imagine her being dependent on me financially. Is this similar to the experiences of others where the man does the cooking?

Men are often better cooks. The great chefs are 95% male.

It's a poor stereotype to say cooking is women's work.

Congrats on being able to cook!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of the married men I know do the cooking.

Who are these lucky women? I know very few with husbands who cook beyond grilling or spaghetti with red sauce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of the married men I know do the cooking.

Who are these lucky women? I know very few with husbands who cook beyond grilling or spaghetti with red sauce.

All the couples you know must have misogynist husbands who put the little lady in the kitchen then.

[Anonymous]

I dated a guy who loved to cook. He taught me a lot about cooking. He was not at all controlling. I was young when we met and not ready to get married, but I do miss him and he later married and she is a lucky one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I dated a guy who loved to cook. He taught me a lot about cooking. He was not at all controlling. I was young when we met and not ready to get married, but I do miss him and he later married and she is a lucky one.

You were just to young to realize how abusive he was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some men like to cook. Usually they are very controlling.

Yep, exactly! I've never seen a man who likes to cook who wasn't somewhat emotionally abusive. It's definitely a red flag for a controlling personality. Just keep an eye out for the other things he insists on controlling.

What!! I am so confused by these comments. Men who cook, in my experience, just like making other people happy and tend to be very caring.

Men who criticize what others eat and insist on only cooking/eating certain foods? That’s a different story, of course. But I’m not seeing the connection with just “cooking.”

Men who cook tend to have oral fixations. So if your man loves to cook he probably also loves to eat a box lunch at the Y. Just saying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some men like to cook. Usually they are very controlling.

Yep, exactly! I've never seen a man who likes to cook who wasn't somewhat emotionally abusive. It's definitely a red flag for a controlling personality. Just keep an eye out for the other things he insists on controlling.

What!! I am so confused by these comments. Men who cook, in my experience, just like making other people happy and tend to be very caring.

Men who criticize what others eat and insist on only cooking/eating certain foods? That’s a different story, of course. But I’m not seeing the connection with just “cooking.”

Men who cook tend to have oral fixations. So if your man loves to cook he probably also loves to eat a box lunch at the Y. Just saying.

But he's going to be very controlling when he does that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some men like to cook. Usually they are very controlling.

Yep, exactly! I've never seen a man who likes to cook who wasn't somewhat emotionally abusive. It's definitely a red flag for a controlling personality. Just keep an eye out for the other things he insists on controlling.

So the same holds true for women?

Interesting.

No wonder nobody can cook anymore.