Who has aged better? DH or DW?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:50s. Opposite in my neighborhood.

Dads out of shape, drinking catching up to them. Bald, overweight.

Mom’s working out, fit. Skincare.

+100

Could not recognize any of the men at my 30-year HS reunion. Many of the women looked remarkably the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:50s. Opposite in my neighborhood.

Dads out of shape, drinking catching up to them. Bald, overweight.

Mom’s working out, fit. Skincare.

The men who have aged the worst in our neighborhood are the men whose wives have told me they are heavy/regular drinkers. For sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of the women I know and am friends with have aged better than their husbands. Dhs are chubby, age spots from not wearing sunscreen, wrinkles from no skincare/sunscreen and they dress poorly. My friends are hot, athletic, beautiful skin, nice hair and have stayed interesting as well.

You want these women sexually admit it

[Anonymous]

Aging better is a social construct. We allow men to naturally age and can find older men attractive. Whereas older women are repulsive simply for getting old. So whether DW is actually healthier or happier than DH does not matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my circle all of the dads have aged better. Frankly, they have easier lives and get more permission from work and society to take care of themselves and carve out time for themselves (gym, golf, guys’ trips) than women. I see the impact of childbearing and second shift on both myself and my mom friends.

Something happens once kids are in HS/college, though, because the moms start to look better than the dads. My theory is that moms get more aggressive about taking care of themselves once the kids are independent, but dads are complacent and haven’t faced many consequences for their lifestyles yet.

I don't give my husband permission to get more gym time, hobby time, or friend trips than I do. We both work, and fairness is important to me, so I make time for myself now and assign him child and home-related tasks (the mental load of managing schedules falls on me, so I have to tell him when and where to be so I can do things for myself.)

Lol at you “give him permission” and “assign him tasks.” It’s like you think you are in charge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The internalized misogyny is strong in this thread.

Sooo true. And sad.

[Anonymous]

Husband-wife, both the same age, early 60s. They're both White and used to be blonde. They have the same level of sun damage, which is bad. He gained weight, but she didn't. She's classic "skinny fat." Despite this, he comes across as much more vivacious/younger. He moves like a person who still plays sports and leads an active life, since he does. She's on the verge of becoming a frail older woman and has never exercised. She didn't work or volunteer for the past 20ish years without daily contact with other people, whereas he was forging a new second career path over the past several years. Also, she doesn't like to wear makeup or style her hair, and seems to buy her clothes from Coldwater Creek and J. Jill, based on the catalogues sent to the house. He dresses in up to date clothing that is appropriate for someone his age/status and is very well groomed.

It seems to me that people might look the same age in a still shot photo. But once you interact with them in real life, much more is revealed.

[Anonymous]

Depends on wealth and job type. The DWs who are in Sales look amazing but definitely work out, do botox, weight loss, are getting their nails/hair done a lot, lipo, etc. and have time to rest and outsource day to day stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The internalized misogyny is strong in this thread.

Sooo true. And sad.

Wait, which part? That women put so much time into appearance?

[Anonymous]

No - in most couples we know, the wife has aged better. I’m 44 and DH is 47 and we have aged similarly, but DH is also a fitness nut who takes very good care of his skin. Most of the men we know are not like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Aging better is a social construct. We allow men to naturally age and can find older men attractive. Whereas older women are repulsive simply for getting old. So whether DW is actually healthier or happier than DH does not matter. [/quote

Thank you]

[Anonymous]

"Depends on wealth and job type. The DWs who are in Sales look amazing but definitely work out, do botox, weight loss, are getting their nails/hair done a lot, lipo, etc. and have time to rest and outsource day to day stuff."

I don't think getting your nails done keeps you looking younger. Nor does getting your hair done more often, unless that means not coloring your roots. What matters more is whether you have an up to date hair style. If you're still wearing your hair the way you did 10 years, ago, that's going to age you. I know tons of women in their late 50s who tell their hair stylist to just give them the same cut over and over. Even when the stylist suggests something new, which is usually their way of telling you gently that your style needs an update, they refuse.

[Anonymous]

I am older than my husband but look younger. He didn't wear sunscreen, drank a lot, was a former smoker, and has gained and lost a lot of weight.

I always wore sunscreen and really took care of my skin, I never smoked and I barely drink. People often mistake me for younger.

[Anonymous]

We were equal until about two years ago.
DH was never over weight but slowed down with exercise and was “soft” I would say.

Then 2 years ago he went on a fitness kick and skin care routine and he looks about 5-10 years younger. He is 50 and people that do
Not know him think he is closer to 30 than 50.
Has abs and all that and lifts a lot.

Very annoying - but it works for him.
I need to have upper and lower eye surgery to get to his level now.

[Anonymous]

I'm biased but I definitely think I've aged better than my husband. He doesn't do any skin care, not even washing his face and rarely wears sunscreen, so he has a lot of wrinkles.