Is anyone else spiraling?

[Anonymous]

Dp, spiraling. It’s just too much, everyday it’s something new. On top of all of it, my marriage is on the brink of divorce but now we’re not sure we can afford it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m not spiraling yet, but I’m paralyzed about planning ahead. Ex.: my husband’s car is 18y old and every now and then we are smacked with 4k/2k and similar mechanic bills. He was working from home so it was doable. Now he is back at the office and if things were normal and relatively predictable, we would be buying a commuter car for him right now, before prices go up because of Trump taxes.

But we are still undecided because we don’t know if he will be RIFed next week or within the next 8 months.

I’m not even talking about vacations, camps and the like, but necessities such as the example above and fixing things in the house that NEED to be fixed/replaced ASAP.

The uncertainty is paralyzing.

I hear you can pick up a cybertruck on the cheap.

[Anonymous]

Not at all. Living on less is what I do best.
I never upgraded my lifestyle. The money just grew. While the total is down right now, I didn't really plan to use it any time soon.
Everyone is still healthy and that's good.
Talking about vacations, I saw $500 tickets to EU in May and December. Once there, everything is cheap for us or even free.
Not having to work for money is better than I expected. Glad I made it happen.
My work was physically hard 12-hour shift without a break. I had to get out.
I remember 2001 and 2008/9 very well. This time I'm prepared.

[Anonymous]

I think what is helping me lately is the nicer weather and everything that comes with this time of year going into summer. Things were really bad Jan/Feb/March as we came to realize the show we were entering. On top of an already depressing time of the year.

[Anonymous]

OP - Yes, for the last couple weeks everything has seemed like it’s spiraling. Big things like my work stress and my husband’s work and more minor things like kids activities going sideways, varying degrees of house issues and the market crashing. I wish I could tell you it got better, but nope it got worse.

My husband was rightly stressed about his job as he got laid off on Friday. So everything is much worse than a week ago, yet I feel a bit calmer which is weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m not spiraling yet, but I’m paralyzed about planning ahead. Ex.: my husband’s car is 18y old and every now and then we are smacked with 4k/2k and similar mechanic bills. He was working from home so it was doable. Now he is back at the office and if things were normal and relatively predictable, we would be buying a commuter car for him right now, before prices go up because of Trump taxes.

But we are still undecided because we don’t know if he will be RIFed next week or within the next 8 months.

I’m not even talking about vacations, camps and the like, but necessities such as the example above and fixing things in the house that NEED to be fixed/replaced ASAP.

The uncertainty is paralyzing.

I hear you can pick up a cybertruck on the cheap.

I’m the above poster whose husband lost his job. Maybe I feel calmer now because I know we can’t spend on anything until he gets a new one. It’s not paralyzing, it’s just a no. The 11 year old car with 150k on it that we were wanting to replace is going to have to stay. Same thing with the cell phones that still work but are 4 years old. No longer stressed about planning a vacation because there won’t be one.

As you can tell by the 11 year old car and 4 year old cell phones, we’re not big spenders. We’ve always saved and waited until something is about to die before replacing, so it was stressful to figure out if we should go ahead and do so. I am glad we replaced a couple of older appliances at the end of last year, but annoyed that we put off fixing other house issues that we will have to live with.

But, I’d rather be stressed about the above than face job loss and the huge hole in the budget at a miserable time to look for a job and rising prices.

[Anonymous]

You can deal with a lot if you have a strong and supportive spouse. Can’t imagine being married to a MAGA incel. Gross. I bet he does nothing around the house or for the kids.

[Anonymous]

I have two brothers and have stopped talking to one of them. It's a loss.

I haven't lost my job but I'm so distracted by the news that I'm not really performing well. I feel stupid all the time, and like I should be doing a better job, but the world is burning.

My house is a mess.

Have lost a bunch of 401K money. Moved more money to bonds on Friday but will probably now miss any upswing that happens. It just doesn't seem like there will be a bottom anytime soon.

[Anonymous]

I am so sorry to hear that you are spiraling OP.
Reading your post makes me sad.

I cannot believe all the financial havoc that one evil person has wrecked on an entire nation! 😡 (Orange stain is right!!)

It makes no sense……
The current administration is a-okay w/cutting people’s jobs/careers yet at the same time they are also trying their best to end many of the social programs that have existed for decades, giving people a safety net such as Medicaid + Food Stamps.

There are many people that want to work and pay taxes yet they are being fired left and right. (No pun intended.)

I live in SoCal and our local universities are deporting innocent students for seemingly benign issues.

Our nation is in a state of great crisis right now yet I can only partially blame the Prez.
The remainder of the blame goes to all the angry voters who gave this clown the power over so much in our country!

[Anonymous]

If you lost 70k your financial situation cannot be as bad as you believe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is anyone else spiraling? I’m a fed and my job seems up in the air which makes it incredibly hard to do my job right now. I debate just quitting and becoming a sahm but it seems like such a huge jump. Nothing seems to really have purpose and I’m always tired (mostly because I start work at 6am). No vacations planned due to finances. Lost 70k last week in the stock market (not even part of my 401k, which was likely much much worse). It’s really hard to plan for the future because I don’t know what it looks like (like summer camps for kids or vacations).

Dh and I now argue because he likes Trump, which is probably the worst thing that’s happened currently in my life. We had an incredible marriage and now there’s this awful orange stain on it.

Everything seems like it’s up in the air. I really thought we had a good life before this mess. And before you all come at me, I’m a moderate. I haven’t felt well represented in politics for years.

So, it's really your husband that is your problem. If you think that isn't the problem, you are not a moderate. You were also ok with this, is that what I am picking up?

Get on the reddit thread "I didn’t think the leopards would eat my face." You'll have some comraderie there.
Regarding life plans- don't change anything- wait and see what happens, then- adjust your spending and lifestyle.

Op here. Yeah I think if my husband had my back I would be ok. He’s always been my best friend, the perfect husband, perfect father, cooks, cleans, and is kind. He is now cheering on the Fed firings and supports Trump. He’s always been a fiscal conservative/social liberal. Maybe from the outside it looks like they’re getting rid of wasteful spending, but I’m on the inside and I can see the wanton cruelty of doge. Nothing about it makes sense even from a financial standpoint. And anytime I try to talk about what’s going on, he starts going on about Biden.

I can’t give up a long marriage with 3 small kids but how can my husband support all of this?!!!

Why isn’t he listening and trusting your informed opinion above those of tv/internet strangers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Meh I’m in almost the exact same boat and I’m not spiraling yet. I’m too busy with three kids. I agree though it is hard to stay motivated as a fed, although many would be happy to take my place. I understand why half the country elected trump, because they were getting a bad deal. I doubt if trump will fix it with his dramatic cutting but I get why there’s no sympathy for Feds and our stock portfolios. Half of Americans don’t have stocks or retirement! I think you need to gain some perspective. I’m grateful for every penny I can put away. I recognize how many Americans are much less fortunate than we are. I’m sad that my party (democratic) abandoned the working class and basically ceded this election to trump. We should have been dealing with the effects on the working class long ago. Instead we have H1b programs and tech billionaires. I made my peace with my dh. I’m not going to divorce him over politics.

The Democrat Party was ENTIRELY about the middle class and working class. ENTIRELY. Biden left at the time we had the strongest economy and jobs market. You are just as deluded as your spouse! Enjoy the next 4 years because they will be quite the learning experience.

No they were not. They were for all working class people who are not white. They openly disdain white working class men. That’s the problem right there. We need class solidarity and the democratic party divided us apart and now we are being conquered.

Can you please explain how democrats openly disdained white working class men? I hear this a lot but I’m interested in the support (unless you think trying to bring others up to the same level counts as disdaining).

[Anonymous]

I consider working for instacart a few times a week for extra money. I work in complementary healthcare and my bookings are becoming slim due to local area job loss. My partner is a fed and our lives have been upended in several directions. We are aligned politically. I cannot imagine how difficult it would be otherwise.

My only advice is to continue to break the days up into small achievable goals, plan out the week and be flexible if you can’t get to it all, drink lots of water, sleep more, do not murder.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m not spiraling yet, but I’m paralyzed about planning ahead. Ex.: my husband’s car is 18y old and every now and then we are smacked with 4k/2k and similar mechanic bills. He was working from home so it was doable. Now he is back at the office and if things were normal and relatively predictable, we would be buying a commuter car for him right now, before prices go up because of Trump taxes.

But we are still undecided because we don’t know if he will be RIFed next week or within the next 8 months.

I’m not even talking about vacations, camps and the like, but necessities such as the example above and fixing things in the house that NEED to be fixed/replaced ASAP.

The uncertainty is paralyzing.

I hear you can pick up a cybertruck on the cheap.

Is it a good cooking fuel resource?

[Anonymous]

Yeah, ive been spiraling. It's part of my job to monitor the government shenanigans and determine responses for our very international business.

I have:
- Cut out reddit

- Been trying to reduce screen time in general, listening to Digital Minimalism on audiobook and the concepts are surprisingly helpful even though i feel like I'm being lectured by the author

- Been journaling on paper, including an end of the day "purge" where i just write down every thought I have until I feel empty. It helps.

- prioritized sleep

- started doing very dumb hobbies could never be monetized and are pointless. It feels good. One is flying a kite.