Hostess Etiquette - how do you both serve and sit with guests?

[Anonymous]

I wish I had waitstaff. That would make things so much easier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The whole scenario is weird. No wonder people didn’t know what to do. Serve appetizers and drinks in the living room or something while you are finishing the mains. Once the main dishes are ready, set up a buffet on the kitchen island, and ask everyone to come make a plate and take their seat.

Don’t make things weirdly complicated. Sitting at a dining table eating finger foods while your host is in the kitchen?! Beyond weird.

NP here. As someone who lives in a modest home in a modest neighborhood, this setup would be totally fine. I only have one table. My living room doesn’t have a coffee table. I have set out appetizers/snacks on my dining room table, which is next to my kitchen and people do what they want while I’m finishing the main. Then I either shift things around (they help—they do not sit and stare at me while I run around), or I serve dinner from (gasp!) the kitchen! When I say help yourself, they do. It may not be Emily Post appropriate, but we are kind good people who have a good time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The whole scenario is weird. No wonder people didn’t know what to do. Serve appetizers and drinks in the living room or something while you are finishing the mains. Once the main dishes are ready, set up a buffet on the kitchen island, and ask everyone to come make a plate and take their seat.

Don’t make things weirdly complicated. Sitting at a dining table eating finger foods while your host is in the kitchen?! Beyond weird.

NP here. As someone who lives in a modest home in a modest neighborhood, this setup would be totally fine. I only have one table. My living room doesn’t have a coffee table. I have set out appetizers/snacks on my dining room table, which is next to my kitchen and people do what they want while I’m finishing the main. Then I either shift things around (they help—they do not sit and stare at me while I run around), or I serve dinner from (gasp!) the kitchen! When I say help yourself, they do. It may not be Emily Post appropriate, but we are kind good people who have a good time.

This sounds fine to me. I also think there are plenty of people who don't eat in the living room, even if they have the space.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The whole scenario is weird. No wonder people didn’t know what to do. Serve appetizers and drinks in the living room or something while you are finishing the mains. Once the main dishes are ready, set up a buffet on the kitchen island, and ask everyone to come make a plate and take their seat.

Don’t make things weirdly complicated. Sitting at a dining table eating finger foods while your host is in the kitchen?! Beyond weird.

NP here. As someone who lives in a modest home in a modest neighborhood, this setup would be totally fine. I only have one table. My living room doesn’t have a coffee table. I have set out appetizers/snacks on my dining room table, which is next to my kitchen and people do what they want while I’m finishing the main. Then I either shift things around (they help—they do not sit and stare at me while I run around), or I serve dinner from (gasp!) the kitchen! When I say help yourself, they do. It may not be Emily Post appropriate, but we are kind good people who have a good time.

I realized this season that I needed to buy a coffee table for the living room. Without it there was no way I could serve hor duerz for a dinner party I was hosting if I wanted the dining table set before hand. My grandmother always served soup, but that adds a whole other couse where you have to get up and if you don't have a kitchen separate from the dining room it's just not as tidy or easy to do. I skipped the soup. It seems like house set ups can be a huge problem.