Purposely peeing in nighttime pull-ups during the night? WWYD?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Night time dryness is something they have to grow into - you can’t bribe them into it. It makes sense that he was wet at night when starting Kinder. My kids had accidents when they were super tired for a while too.

He may be aware when the peeing happens, but still not be fully in control. When they were almost but not quite ready to ditch night time pull-ups, my boys both peed just as they were waking up but still groggy. They knew what was happening when it was happening, but not far enough in advance to get up and go to the bathroom.


OP here, you put into words what I've been (poorly) trying to explain.

He co-sleeps with us semi-regularly, so I can say with certainty that he's such a deep sleeper that I doubt he's quite at the point where he could independently stagger out of bed and manage to go to the bathroom unassisted, by then he'll have already peed.

What I'm more wondering, is do we hoist him over to the bathroom and try and plop him on the toilet in time? Or just call it good and let him pee in his pull-up?


Just accept it for now. It’s not hurting anything. I wouldn’t stress over it.
Anonymous
Are you making sure he goes to the bathroom right before bed? That sounds like an excessive amount of pee for a child his age. He shouldn't be peeing in the night, then also wake up in the morning bursting needing to go.
Anonymous
We were having a lot of accidents with my kid at night, especially around 4 am.

For a few weeks, I started waking up at 4 am, picked my kid up from his bed, and sat him on the toilet to pee. It was frankly less hassle than cleaning him up, changing sheets etc, doing laundry etc. I think within a month, he was getting up himself and peeing in the toilet.

I also set up a small corner in his room with a nightlight, waterproof mat, and a portable big kid potty - JIC he did not make it till the bathroom. He probably used it once or twice.
Anonymous
Do you take him to bathroom in the middle of the night for a dream pee? That was how we did it with our 5.5 year old. Typically one right before we went to bed, then another a few hours later when my husband woke up to pee.

She was (is) such a heavy sleeper she didnt wake up when she needed to pee, and she needed to pee in the middle of the night. It took several weeks, and she still had accidents occasionally- but I worked.

We did this during the COVID shutdown- I don’t know if it would have worked if she had still been going to Kindergarten - being home all the time actually helped with her anxiety that she had with Kindergarten (even though she had been in daycare before).
Anonymous
We'll give this a try! I've been hesitant to wake him up in the night, because he's not a very graceful awakener (??).

But, this would be very manageable to try especially the nights where he crashes in here with us.

Will report back if we see any success!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:We'll give this a try! I've been hesitant to wake him up in the night, because he's not a very graceful awakener (??).

But, this would be very manageable to try especially the nights where he crashes in here with us.

Will report back if we see any success!


It’s more important at this age that he gets sleep than worry about if he’s able to stay dry. I promise you it’s perfectly normal what he is doing and nothing to be concerned about. Waking him up middle of the night could actually create other issues.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Also, kind of as a silly aside--!

Is it weird that we generally let him come downstairs and eat breakfast still in his pull up? We don't do a big complicated breakfast by any stretch. But, usually he's good about taking his pull up off after breakfast.


In a wet pull-up? Or in a dry one that he then pees in while eating breakfast?

Yes, either of those are weird and gross.
Anonymous
Can you do reusable pull up or plastic pants? Maybe he needs to feel wet to transition away from this. It would still protect bed.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We'll give this a try! I've been hesitant to wake him up in the night, because he's not a very graceful awakener (??).

But, this would be very manageable to try especially the nights where he crashes in here with us.

Will report back if we see any success!


It’s more important at this age that he gets sleep than worry about if he’s able to stay dry. I promise you it’s perfectly normal what he is doing and nothing to be concerned about. Waking him up middle of the night could actually create other issues.


SO just shot down waking him up in the night when he's in here sleeping with us. Which, fair enough. DS waking up in the night is usually somewhat of a bull-in-a-china-shop situation. I don't mind waiting to address it until he's older. Just a bit nervous that he's getting in the habit of peeing while he's semi-awake.
Anonymous
Chalk it up to kids just being kids. As other people have stated it’s not as big of a deal as you might think. When he gets older he will outgrow it and you will have much more serious things to worry about.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Also, kind of as a silly aside--!

Is it weird that we generally let him come downstairs and eat breakfast still in his pull up? We don't do a big complicated breakfast by any stretch. But, usually he's good about taking his pull up off after breakfast.


In a wet pull-up? Or in a dry one that he then pees in while eating breakfast?

Yes, either of those are weird and gross.


NP, my kids do this almost every morning. We'll, they don't pee in the pullup after they wake up. But they certainly don't get changed ASAP per se.

It's not the end of the world. They both take showers before getting dressed for the day.

Why would it be gross for a kid to be in a wet pull up for 5 more minutes, after they just slept in said pull up for 10 hours?
Anonymous
I don’t always get myself out of bed and dressed and showered first thing in the morning. Sometimes check my email or news on my phone or whatever. Sometimes need coffee before I’m ready to do anything. So it’s not fair to expect a child to be more responsible and organized than most adults are.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I don’t always get myself out of bed and dressed and showered first thing in the morning. Sometimes check my email or news on my phone or whatever. Sometimes need coffee before I’m ready to do anything. So it’s not fair to expect a child to be more responsible and organized than most adults are.


I’m gonna be that person and blame Covid for this one. But since my kids basically lived in their pajamas during the pandemic lockdowns, I've gotten way less bothered by my kids not changing the very second they wake up.

That doesn't mean that walking around in a soaked pull-up all morning is OK. But if he wakes up and shuffles downstairs for a few minutes then really it's no skin off my teeth. My guy doesn't saturate his pull ups overnight though, so it's a bit easier to be casual about it with him.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Need some help with this one folks!

My son (5 year old) has been on and off of nighttime pull-ups for the past year. We did away with the pull ups when he'd go for a while waking up dry (usually a week or so of dry mornings). We had to go back to pull-ups when he started kindergarten, because he was suddenly waking up wet *every* morning, and it was wrecking everyone's sleep.

However, the issue now is that while he DOES still for sure have actual accidents at night when he's sound asleep, I'm all but certain that there's also times where he just pees on purpose. He's all but confirmed this to us. But, at the same time, we can't get rid of the pull-ups wholesale, as he clearly still needs them while he's asleep at night. The other night, he wandered into our room late into the night, and found out right as he was about to climb into bed with us that he had peed on the way over from his room!

What do we do here, RE: the occasional purposeful peeing? Do we just leave it alone?

We tried to float rewards as a bribe to encourage him to NOT do this, but it's hard to even tell for sure, because as I said, he does also still have real accidents in the night.

Give him a small token bribe for dry pullup. Make it big enough it catches his attention but small enough it doesn't gut him that it wasnt his fault if he had a legit overnight accident
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