To the mom who purposely rear-ended my DH in front of day care this morning...

[Anonymous]

I hate to go against the Greek Chorus of support, but we have OP's version of her husband's story. OP was not a witness, and as honest and reliable as I'm sure OP is, she wasn't there. I've come home many a time after an incident on the Beltway or such and tried to describe it to my husband and it's hard to do without drama and creative license. "He nearly killed me!"

I'm sorry OP, but you need to let this go. If your husband posts about it himself, I'm prepared to hear his story. But I'm not going to play "Whisper Down The Lane" about an incident in which you admit there was no damage to your car and in which, as another poster points out, this woman might have been flustered and accidentally put her car in reverse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just a thought but is it possible she was so caught up in her own thoughts that she accidentally threw the car drive and then reverse?

I wondered that too--could it have been accidental because she had so little space to get out? Not that that would excuse her atrocious behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just a thought but is it possible she was so caught up in her own thoughts that she accidentally threw the car drive and then reverse?

I wondered that too--could it have been accidental because she had so little space to get out? Not that that would excuse her atrocious behavior.

OP here -

There was no one in front of her, so she did not have to back up at all to pull out. And it did not appear to be a mistake.

To the PP who said I have only DH's story, I also have the accounts from the 2 infant room teachers who said exactly the same thing that he said.

We saw her again this morning and identified her and I had a discussion witht he director. I didnt confront the woman directly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She backed into our car but it didnt cause any damage. We have no interest in prosecuting her, I just want her to chill out and realize that she cannot act that way, particularly to a fellow school parent with the kids around.

She might need anger management classes and filing a report may just scare her. Do you want her to do this again?

[Anonymous]

I'm sure that maybe she was flustered - and maybe she just accidently put her car in reverse, or whatever. But if it was your child who had just stepped out into the parking lot and this crazy lady almost hit. I'm sure you guys wouldn't be so quick to "let her slide on by"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure that maybe she was flustered - and maybe she just accidently put her car in reverse, or whatever. But if it was your child who had just stepped out into the parking lot and this crazy lady almost hit. I'm sure you guys wouldn't be so quick to "let her slide on by"

I'd love to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she put her car in drive, drove forward, then put her car in reverse and slammed into our car. It was not a mistake bc she was already moving forward and did not need to reverse at all.

I am sure the director and the board member we spoke with will give her a nice talking to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure that maybe she was flustered - and maybe she just accidently put her car in reverse, or whatever. But if it was your child who had just stepped out into the parking lot and this crazy lady almost hit. I'm sure you guys wouldn't be so quick to "let her slide on by"

I'd love to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she put her car in drive, drove forward, then put her car in reverse and slammed into our car. It was not a mistake bc she was already moving forward and did not need to reverse at all.

I am sure the director and the board member we spoke with will give her a nice talking to.

Big deal. Get the police involved.

[Anonymous]

I think I'd do what you did. Report it to the director of the day care and then move on.

Yes, there's no excuse for what she did -- it was obnoxious! And hopefully she was just having a terrible day and is a better person than her crazy behavior suggests. But if she's truly a nut job, the last thing you want is to be drawn into some feud or other type of drama with her.

Take the high road and steer clear. If she's truly crazy, this could get a lot worse, and you and your family don't need that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't care if OP is a *whackadoo* or if her DH had just finished calling that woman every name under the sun. Short of a serious chemical imbalance, there is NO excuse for that sort of behavior. Damage or not, I think I'd file a police report, just on principle. People like that behave that way because they think they can get away with it.

I totally agree with this. And I'm not a punitive or vindictive person, but it needs to be clear that this is not acceptable. Especially for the benefit of your I'm sure terrified kids. And hopefully will be the lightbulb she needs to go get some anger management, which will infinitely benefit her own kids. Scary.

[Anonymous]

I'd love to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she put her car in drive, drove forward, then put her car in reverse and slammed into our car.

If she really slammed into your car, why is there no damage? Was there damage to her car? Maybe it was more of a tap then a slam... and has become more dramatic in the retelling? Either way, that still doesn't make it right, but I don't think I'd up the ante by filing a police report if there was no damage. I would steer clear of her however.

Also, rather than asking your daycare to intervene with her (which may put them in an awkward spot), maybe you could suggest that they circulate whatever policies exist on parking and drop-offs and remind parents about the importance of safe AND courteous behavior at these times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I'd love to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she put her car in drive, drove forward, then put her car in reverse and slammed into our car.

If she really slammed into your car, why is there no damage? Was there damage to her car? Maybe it was more of a tap then a slam... and has become more dramatic in the retelling? Either way, that still doesn't make it right, but I don't think I'd up the ante by filing a police report if there was no damage. I would steer clear of her however.

Also, rather than asking your daycare to intervene with her (which may put them in an awkward spot), maybe you could suggest that they circulate whatever policies exist on parking and drop-offs and remind parents about the importance of safe AND courteous behavior at these times.

Ever heard of a bumper?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I'd love to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she put her car in drive, drove forward, then put her car in reverse and slammed into our car.

If she really slammed into your car, why is there no damage? Was there damage to her car? Maybe it was more of a tap then a slam... and has become more dramatic in the retelling? Either way, that still doesn't make it right, but I don't think I'd up the ante by filing a police report if there was no damage. I would steer clear of her however.

Also, rather than asking your daycare to intervene with her (which may put them in an awkward spot), maybe you could suggest that they circulate whatever policies exist on parking and drop-offs and remind parents about the importance of safe AND courteous behavior at these times.

Ever heard of a bumper?

I backed up into someone's bumper while parallel parking, and I quit trying to do self-help and got my insurance company involved when they presented me with a bill for $4,600 from a reputable body shop.

[Anonymous]

Was there damage to the bumper? They're not invincible, you know. If slammed, they get damaged. They're actually designed to get damaged if hit and absorb force in a hit to prevent the rest of the car from being damaged.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd love to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she put her car in drive, drove forward, then put her car in reverse and slammed into our car. It was not a mistake bc she was already moving forward and did not need to reverse at all.

If this is true, it's vehicular assault and it's a crime (a fairly serious one). I'd file a police report once you've identified the person and let them decide whether to drop it or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Also, rather than asking your daycare to intervene with her (which may put them in an awkward spot), maybe you could suggest that they circulate whatever policies exist on parking and drop-offs and remind parents about the importance of safe AND courteous behavior at these times.

I haven't weighed in before, but: are you kidding me?? I mean really? "Circulate their policies"? Do you believe that the woman rammed another car because she was unaware that such behavior might be against policy?

To me, as the story is told, this woman's behavior was intended to say "You have made me angry. I have a weapon and I will use it. Beware." She could have pulled out a (legal, licensed, unloaded) pistol and brandished it about, and my reaction would be pretty much the same: that this is a person who is seriously unbalanced.

If it really happened the way OP said it happened, with the woman using her car to send the message "I will hurt you", I would be on the daycare's ass day and night to have that family removed from the institution. However, I do not believe that it happened the way OP said it did. Because if it really did, then I can't believe she would be so chill about it. What she described was a specific, serious, and sincere threat. A normal person does not have a chat with the director about such an incident, and then let it go.