"You're so ugly"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom does this as well and she's done it her whole life. I wouldn't necessarily blame others (her dad, spouse). My mom always thought of herself as very pretty and I had to hear how ugly I was often in my teens. I suppose this mattered so much to her. I do think your grandpa said stuff like this jokingly as I've never met a man who cared. Maybe he did this to rile up your aunt as he'd certainly know how shallow she is.

WTF. Your Mother sounds like a terrible human being.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are 54 years old and really care about this? Please get help if it is that serious to you.

I think it's totally understandable why the OP is hurt and I think you lack empathy, PP. Not every emotional reaction necessitates therapy.

[Anonymous]

It seems like her whole family had major issues and insecurities around physical appearance, and that was expressed in really inappropriate and harmful ways. File these mean-spirited comments (from both of them) away as the ramblings of some people deeply harmed by their pasts. You are a wonderful, resilient person and you are far bigger than their hateful comments.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand, are you ugly or not ? You should have your own self awareness by now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Eff you too, aunt Hilda!" Op, your aunt sucks. Young you had the right attitude...go with that.

NP, agree. Seriously, I had an aunt like this and she died in April. I was ecstatic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You said she's mentally ill.

I would write off anything she says. Her father can't speak for himself anymore.

Sorry it got under your skin. I've had similar experiences.

This. It sucks but let it go.

[Anonymous]

Sorry OP. I think this stuff gets passed down. My grandma always told my mom she would need surgery to be pretty. And my mom told me I needed to wear makeup to look ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re 54 so your aunt is probably mid 70s at the youngest, likely older? Who cares, it’s probably just the ramblings of an old person who is losing their filter (at best)/showing early signs of dementia. You can’t confront someone like this either because they don’t see anything wrong with their behavior because they’re mentally compromised. Just ignore and maybe keep conversations with her to a surface level going forward, change the subject when she starts to go on about the past etc.

Old mean can be very mean. There is literally a phrase “mean old man” It’s a thing. Remember that.