Would you let your daughter change her name?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'd be more concerned about the reason she wants to change her name. That needs to be addressed immediately.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'd be more concerned about the reason she wants to change her name. That needs to be addressed immediately.

OP here-she's just really tired of having her name pronounced incorrectly by grown adults. Some kids have made fun of her in the past because of what teachers have called her.

[Anonymous]

I had a last name that people pronounced incorrectly. When I started college I took my mom's maiden name, which is easy for everyone to pronounce. That was 41 years ago and I am STILL so happy I did that, and I love my name, and I'm not afraid to introduce myself.

It's pretty harmless, OP, imo and she can always change it back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'd be more concerned about the reason she wants to change her name. That needs to be addressed immediately.

Dunno, I have a very ethnic, hard to pronounce name, and went by a shortened “American” version starting in middle school, but switched back to the full name in college. I promise I am proud of my cultural heritage and all that! Sometimes one just gets tired of having to repeat and spell out name EVERY time.

[Anonymous]

I did this as a kid. My grandparents never made the change. My parents took about 10 years. Everyone else switched almost immediately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'd be more concerned about the reason she wants to change her name. That needs to be addressed immediately.

Dunno, I have a very ethnic, hard to pronounce name, and went by a shortened “American” version starting in middle school, but switched back to the full name in college. I promise I am proud of my cultural heritage and all that! Sometimes one just gets tired of having to repeat and spell out name EVERY time.

Yes, I have a very foreign name and it is such a pita, to the point I didn't like being introduced to people because it became a conversation and it was embarrassing for it to always be such a focus.. I just go by an initial now. My preference would be my full name, but it just can't happen.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think it’s always a matter of “letting” a DD change her name. My DD’s school friends gave her a nickname and it’s stuck. Now everyone at school calls her that. I don’t like it and family calls her by her real name, but DD likes the nickname as it’s gender neutral and more “edgy” which is trendy for teens now.

[Anonymous]

Yes, she can use her middle and decide later if she wants a legal change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think it’s always a matter of “letting” a DD change her name. My DD’s school friends gave her a nickname and it’s stuck. Now everyone at school calls her that. I don’t like it and family calls her by her real name, but DD likes the nickname as it’s gender neutral and more “edgy” which is trendy for teens now.

+1 I gave my daughter an "ethnic" name that also lands as very gendered in a US context (more than in my home country). She shortened it to something more "American" and also more gender neutral. Fine. Maybe she'll go back to her birth name someday, and maybe not, but it's her name and her life.

[Anonymous]

I don't even understand how "not allowing" this works. It's her name. Why would you think she needs your permission?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't even understand how "not allowing" this works. It's her name. Why would you think she needs your permission?

Adding that in middle school I started going by a nickname that was somewhat derived from my first name but not a traditional shortening of it. (Think Evelyn-->Vee). Virtually everyone called me it and it was how I introduced myself to teachers and others, and many people still call me it today. I would have never thought to run this by my parents.

[Anonymous]

I am laughing at the comments “white people need to learn ethnic names”. Is this a joke? I have an ethnic name that is very long and white people at least make an effort to pronounce my name unlike other Americans of different races. The worse comments about my name came from American born minorities.

[Anonymous]

We are going through this right now.

DD is 18 and is in the process of legally changing her very lovely ethnic first name. She's always said she didn't like her name. She's always preferred to go by her middle name since she was probably 6 or 7. She's going to legally change it, flipflopping her middle name and her first name.

It makes me sad because I put so much work into picking the perfect name for her before her birth and when she was born, I looked at her and knew she looked exactly like that name, too.

[Anonymous]

I think it was a bit unthoughtful of you to give your DC a name that’s hard to pronounce. My DH wanted to do that and I vetoed it because I wouldn’t have been able to pronounce my own DC’s name! We gave DCs easy to pronounce names.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, especially since it is her middle name.

I know several kids who mostly go by their middle name and it is not a problem.

+1