Struggle to succeed but not celebrated

[Anonymous]

Donuts- the new participation award.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much $ are we talking? How people are giving gifts for this?

Are they checking the report card?

Give your kid As in courses / challenges of your own design, and tell grandad about them.

Yes report cards are shared and A rewarded.

You should stop sharing report cards and, instead, focus on effort.

Two of my three kids has LDs. They've had IEPs since K and all thru HS. I have one kid that is NT.

We focus on effort and willingness to try and to stretch. We have NEVER cared about grades. Imagine my outrage that kids in ES who made the honor roll got a donut at lunch. Two of my kids would never be on the honor roll yet worked so very hard. This is at a school where the principal provided every teacher with Carol Dweck's "Mindset" book.

I complained to the principal, admin staff and IEP team. It's discriminatory and demoralizing to students with disabilities to have to watch their typical peers get donuts while, thru no fault of their own, they do not. Soon after, all kids got donuts.

You seriously wasted people’s time complaining about DONUTS?!

Your children will not survive well in life.

You think my complaint was about donuts? smh

You'll be glad to know my kids are now young adults and doing really well. One, in fact, works on equity issues. Imagine that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much $ are we talking? How people are giving gifts for this?

Are they checking the report card?

Give your kid As in courses / challenges of your own design, and tell grandad about them.

Yes report cards are shared and A rewarded.

You should stop sharing report cards and, instead, focus on effort.

Two of my three kids has LDs. They've had IEPs since K and all thru HS. I have one kid that is NT.

We focus on effort and willingness to try and to stretch. We have NEVER cared about grades. Imagine my outrage that kids in ES who made the honor roll got a donut at lunch. Two of my kids would never be on the honor roll yet worked so very hard. This is at a school where the principal provided every teacher with Carol Dweck's "Mindset" book.

I complained to the principal, admin staff and IEP team. It's discriminatory and demoralizing to students with disabilities to have to watch their typical peers get donuts while, thru no fault of their own, they do not. Soon after, all kids got donuts.

You seriously wasted people’s time complaining about DONUTS?!

Your children will not survive well in life.

You think my complaint was about donuts? smh

You'll be glad to know my kids are now young adults and doing really well. One, in fact, works on equity issues. Imagine that.

DP. I can imagine. The result of only praising effort and refusing to praise achievement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much $ are we talking? How people are giving gifts for this?

Are they checking the report card?

Give your kid As in courses / challenges of your own design, and tell grandad about them.

Yes report cards are shared and A rewarded.

You should stop sharing report cards and, instead, focus on effort.

Two of my three kids has LDs. They've had IEPs since K and all thru HS. I have one kid that is NT.

We focus on effort and willingness to try and to stretch. We have NEVER cared about grades. Imagine my outrage that kids in ES who made the honor roll got a donut at lunch. Two of my kids would never be on the honor roll yet worked so very hard. This is at a school where the principal provided every teacher with Carol Dweck's "Mindset" book.

I complained to the principal, admin staff and IEP team. It's discriminatory and demoralizing to students with disabilities to have to watch their typical peers get donuts while, thru no fault of their own, they do not. Soon after, all kids got donuts.

You seriously wasted people’s time complaining about DONUTS?!

Your children will not survive well in life.

You think my complaint was about donuts? smh

You'll be glad to know my kids are now young adults and doing really well. One, in fact, works on equity issues. Imagine that.

Does she hand out munchkins for participation effort during “equity”training?

[Anonymous]

PP at 22:44 those were pretty nasty responses for the Special Needs board.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Saw this social media today.

A big shout out to all the kids who didn’t win an award, make honor roll, and barely made it through the school year. A big hug to the moms, dads, grandparents, caregivers, and foster parents that stuck by them as they maneuvered the school year.

To the kids that didn’t get invited to the prom, didn’t get a scholarship to college, and perhaps have to go straight to work out of high school....you are still worthy of a pat on the back and a Facebook post with people talking about how amazing you are.

Some kids have to work twice as hard as other students just to get a C. Their achievements deserve recognition.

Don’t forget those kids.

Kindness, creativity, and generosity....those attributes sadly don’t get the accolades they deserve.

#weseeyou #youareworthy #workjustashardifnotharder

I love this. So glad there are people out there who are thinking of my kid, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I totally get where you’re coming from OP. My DD is also a freshman with ADHD and she busts her butt for B’s. She has some friends who do the bare minimum and pull much higher grades, and it really bums her out. I always try to reward her effort and remind her that some of the kids who don’t have to lift a finger get a rude awakening in college when they actually have to study and discover they don’t know how. But it’s hard.

You have to put down future versions of her friends to make her feel better?

How about using it as a teacheable moment that all people are different in their abilities and it's OK. Wishing calamity on more academically advanced kids is not OK.

Dude what? First of all, the fact that some of these kids can get high grades doing the bare minimum doesn’t make them more “academically advanced” than my kid, it means they don’t have a learning difference that makes things 100x harder. Second, I wasn’t wishing academic calamity on anyone. Reread, then take several seats.

DP
You're still doing it. Asking people to treat your kid as superior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My nephew graduated this last weekend. School was easy for him. Never got a B in high school. He “took some honors classes and some AP classes but not too many because didn’t want to risk getting a “B.”” Didn’t have to study. Graduated with all the cords and everything.

He was rewarded by extended family throughout the years due good grades (lots of $).

Meanwhile my freshman with ADHD works really hard. Studies. Meets with tutors. Status after school for help with teachers. (Has IEP). He works hard for his “B” and “C”.

Never a word from family. Sometimes my dad will say - good improvement but won’t have him a $20 like he did for the other kid. He needs more reinforcement than anyone. Does not get rewarded at all. My family is well aware of his struggles.

I’m so sad that my kid isn’t recognized for his successes even if they aren’t “As”.

Well why aren't they? I know people who praise their kid for every little thing. Make a big deal of it and others will follow.

[Anonymous]

Family (and others) who don’t have the struggle probably will never get it. Reason 1 million why we don’t live near my family.