pregnant with third boy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just before Eli Manning was going to the Super Bowl with the Giants, I remember seeing a great story about him and his relationship with his mother on TV. As the youngest son, he was home with her a lot when the dad and the older boys (Payton, esp) were off already doing the football thing. Eli and his mom are really close, love to shop together, etc. I don't remember the details (and am hopefully not butchering the story) but it was really sweet.

So, don't rule out any kind of relationship with your new (or current) sons. You just don't know what it will be like.

Thank you for sharing this.

[Anonymous]

Here's an article from the NYT that sums it up.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/29/sports/football/29manning.html

Congrats on your third boy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can I remind you that one of the most stylish moms out there has three boys... Victoria Beckham.

Also God must really love you that he didn't give you a girl to be mean to you all through her high school years....

Because regardless of how much you'd love re-doing the drapes and buying a lot of pink clothes.... she'd just hate you for like 10 years of her young life.

And you now have a dynasty of boys who can run for public office and marry beautiful girls that went to boarding schools and attended Brown.

What is with these POSTS? Girls most certainly do not, as a whole, hate their Moms in HS? I never hated my Mom and always liked hanging out with her. Not every girl grows up to be a bitch. Some boys can also be a handful. I realize you're trying to mkake the OP feel better, but please don't do it at the expense of every other poster's daughter.

My teen DD never ACTED like she hated me until a boyfriend cheated on her. Never heard much about him before that except his existence and went out to eat, movie, etc.

[Anonymous]

FWIW

I have 2 boys and would not have it any other way. I have a great relationship with my MIL. My DH is an only child and my MIL has treated me very well. My Dh complains she loves me more than him! Remember that a relationship is a 2 way street and it is give and take.

Having had lots of miscarriages and conception issues, I feel lucky to have any children. Please remember that when you are mourning not having a girl. There are plenty of people out there who would love to be in your shoes.

[Anonymous]

Losing the style thing is a bit ridiculous....my sister has 3 boys (now 16 down to 12) and this woman has always been the most stylish/fashionable woman I have known. She puts me to shame.

I can't blame my lack of stylish dress on my 2 boys.

Personally, I like having all of the same gender. My 2 boys have the same interests---toys, shows, activities, etc....not to mention the hand-me-downs. They are both total clowns and get along great. I see friends who have one of each gender...and they are torn in two completely different directions..one of the kids is always bored since they have completely different interests and wants.

Your feelings are natural, but I know once you meet that little one for the first time that he will be just perfect!

My mother has 7 grandsons---not a single granddaughter. She had 2 girls and a boy of her own...but I know her and my dad always secretly hoped one of the grandkids would be a girl. She even purchased a tea set before the first grandchild was born...funny enough every single one of the grandsons has played with it when they were toddlers.

Best of luck!

[Anonymous]

OP, you might be interested in the following article:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fraternal_birth_order_and_male_sexual_orientation

[Anonymous]

Hi everyone. It's the OP again.

Thanks again for your comments - positive and even the last one. If I have a gay son, so be it. I'll love him just the same. (I saw this "theory" on 60 Minutes years ago. Interestingly enough DH is the youngest of 4 boys and he's definitely VERY hetero, so who knows!)

My original post wasn't so much that I won't love Baby Boy #3. I know I will. I thought #2 was a girl, too (we didn't find out with the first two pregnancies) and was in total shock when they announced HE had arrived! Just goes to show that every pregnancy is different even if you have the same outcome.

I guess I was just venting and wanting a little support. I've since shared my feelings with DH and he understands how I feel. Apparently his mother, who also grew up with just a sister, shared that it's hard to be the only female in the home at times. As much as I hope to have a great relationship with all my children, I know gender won't make a difference. It's just something in common. Someone to share a connections with on things that only a girl could experience. I won't share for fear the naysayers would just call it trite, but they are things that mean something to me.

I am sure I'll find other things, other experiences with my three boys that are just as special, if not more. I grew up with only sisters so this is a whole new journey for me.

To those I may offended for coming off as though having a third boy was unappreciated please know, like I stated in my very first sentence of my very first post, DH and I are fortunate. Believe me, fertility issues are not a problem for us and we are grateful to have two healthy boys with another on the way.

Lastly, the marriage comments: It's just an expression. Yes, DH and I will help if we are asked but we'll certainly offer. FWIW, we married in our 30's, were successfully independent of our families and didn't expect anyone to pay. DH paid for our rehearsal dinner out of his pocket. His parents are older and while they offered, he didn't feel comfortable taking money for something he could easily afford. My parents on the other hand, are very traditional Southerners and insisted on paying for the entire wedding despite my efforts to help pitch in more. My mother said they saved for me and my sisters for years and were happy to give us such a special gift - and it was! My contribution in the end was the band. I insisted on a specific group that was considered "extravagant" by my mother but damn they were good! Win-win for all One day, when hopefully my boys will marry, I may or may not be paying. I may or may not wear beige (my sweet MIL wore blue). But I will still be the MOG and can honestly say, I will be proud and happy!

Again, I appreciate the support and stories of those who shared them. Thanks!

[Anonymous]

You sound like a great mom, OP-- I'm sure you'll be the one all your son's girlfriends (or boyfriends!) adore.

[Anonymous]

I lost a baby in June and I know this is probably the end of the line for me, in terms of hoping for another chid. In a sense, then, I can understand how you feel -- it's hard to let go of our hopes and wishes. I am blessed to have one wonderful child, so I'm trying hard to focus on the abundance in my life, not on a perceived lack. I am sure you will come to do the same, and you will cherish your third boy just as you do the first two. Best wishes to you.

[Anonymous]

I'm so so sorry for your loss, 15:18. Thank you for such a thoughtful perspective.

[Anonymous]

remember that not every little girl wants to wear pink (look at Shiloh Jolie Pitt) and play with dolls, so it's possible your days with that stuff would have been numbered anyway. I have a little girl and she's a total drama queen, much more so than the little boys I know. That can get annoying at times. She's also a master manipulator at 21 months. crazy!

I have a couple of friends that have 3 boys. they just roll their eyes and shake their heads at what their boys get into. the dirt, the bugs, the butt jokes... The families I know with 3 boys, though - the boys all seem to get along pretty well, especially if they're close in age. They seem to have an easy camaraderie that me and my bro and sis didn't quite have. Plus you can re-use a lot of gear and toys etc. and boys take less time in the bathroom, which can be great if you only have 2 in your house.

I think it's normal to be a little disappointed to not get a girl when you are a girl. I know I would have been. Hang in there, and good luck with your pregnancy! (and hey, there's always the option of adopting a little girl...) Also, i think you're getting ahead of yourself a bit on the wedding stuff. It's never occurred to me to think about my daughter getting married. eek. i mean, i hope she does, but it's certainly not something i'll think about for another 20 years.

[Anonymous]

AdequateParent wrote:
I've got what used to be called a tomboy. She went two years wearing only red t-shirts and shorts or jeans. She has never wanted a doll, never liked shopping for clothes, never been into princesses. Her friends are boys, she decided in kindergarten that she's going to be an engineer and wishes she was from Utah (camping is cool), and all of her stuffed animals are astronauts, not babies.

We have a girl, but we do not have the person that many envision when they say "I want a little girl." She's super cool; I have no idea whether she'll call me every day from college or will want to shop for a wedding dress with me. It's anybody's guess what the future holds, but I have a strong sense that her future will not be determined by her chromosomes. This is as it should be.

You are not having boy #3; you are having this boy for the very first and only time and you are the only woman in the history of the world who will ever have this boy. Like his brothers, he will surprise the living crap out of you until you are so old you stop trying to figure him out. And he might be really into helping you find a gorgeous purple gown for his wedding-- even if he marries a woman.

Peace

I really like that!

Anyway, new poster here. I really thought my first was going to be a girl and I ended up with a boy. He is the most awesome little guy in the world. I still hope to have a girl one day. If our second is a boy we will adopt a girl. However, that being said...oddly I've always wanted a little girl to be a tomboy girl. Is that odd? I want her o be just as the above (I guess like I was!).

[Anonymous]

You have every right to feel disapointed. It's fine to want a child of a certain gender. My guess is that as soon as you hold that baby in your arms you won't care.

And hey, at least you can use all the hand-me-down clothes (if your first two haven't destroyed them all).

And odds are, a girl would become a tomboy with two brothers.

[Anonymous]

Agree with PP. You have every right to feel disappointed. But just think of it this way -- you'll have the incredible opportunity to raise three boys into wonderful, compassionate, respectful, loving men. The world needs more of those (esp. according to my single friends!). Also, there is something to be said about being the only girl in the house. That status alone gives you a particularly special place in your family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can I remind you that one of the most stylish moms out there has three boys... Victoria Beckham.

Also God must really love you that he didn't give you a girl to be mean to you all through her high school years....

Because regardless of how much you'd love re-doing the drapes and buying a lot of pink clothes.... she'd just hate you for like 10 years of her young life.

And you now have a dynasty of boys who can run for public office and marry beautiful girls that went to boarding schools and attended Brown.

What is with these POSTS? Girls most certainly do not, as a whole, hate their Moms in HS? I never hated my Mom and always liked hanging out with her. Not every girl grows up to be a bitch. Some boys can also be a handful. I realize you're trying to mkake the OP feel better, but please don't do it at the expense of every other poster's daughter.

I read it as satire, bitch.