Just curious...did anyone actually wait until marriage to have sex?

[Anonymous]

DH and I didn't wait; we met when we were pretty young, and neither of us had a ton of experience, but not each other's firsts either. I've never had any regrets--have always figured it's all good, as all of our experiences made us the people we are for each other.
I was reading the book Kosher Sex by Rabbi Schmuely Boteach, and in it he claims that people who waited till they were married have a statistically lower rate of divorce than those who did not wait. I don't think his claim is backed by any sound evidence.

[Anonymous]

Well, I fucked first and married after. But I did marry the first girl I fucked. And then I married the second girl I fucked. So I guess it didn't really matter about waiting

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be so sad to have remained a virgin until my 30s. Some of the best experiences of my life were with former boyfriends. I do have a friend who waited for religious reasons, and she doesn't regret waiting. Her life is also much slower and, to me, much more boring - the totally typical suburban mom. A lot of people who wait have a certain narrow view of life.

I love how she has to put down others in order to justify the decisions she made. Perhaps your "friend" thinks you're a slut and finds your life...lacking.

Oh right, pp must be a "slut" because she didn't wait till her 30s to have sex. And clearly, her life is "lacking" because she didn't wait at least a decade for the "one." Ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Triple nope...especially since DF and I still aren't married and our daughter is 21 months old.

I can relate - our son is 3 1/2 and we're not married, yet. We just never got around to tying the knot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:although I know for a fact that every orifice (other than the vagina) in her body has been breeched by multiple penises.

Anal too? Oh my, that's way more serious than vaginal sex. Interesting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH and I didn't wait; we met when we were pretty young, and neither of us had a ton of experience, but not each other's firsts either. I've never had any regrets--have always figured it's all good, as all of our experiences made us the people we are for each other.
I was reading the book Kosher Sex by Rabbi Schmuely Boteach, and in it he claims that people who waited till they were married have a statistically lower rate of divorce than those who did not wait. I don't think his claim is backed by any sound evidence.

Might be folks who wait for marriage are then less likely to consider divorce/more likely to stay in a bad/unbalanced marriage.

[Anonymous]

Did not wait and really wish I had. Would have perhaps focused all the energy that went into relationship drama/lust into something more productive.

[Anonymous]

ROFL

[Anonymous]

We did, we both did actually. Met each other at 17, dated off and on for years, finally actually got married at 26. Neither of us had sex with significant others, it just didn't feel right. We were both virgins on our wedding night, and it was just so incredibly sexy and special.
I would say the experience itself was really hot, frankly. Not awkward at all. I love the fact that our entire sexual relationship is based on each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We did, we both did actually. Met each other at 17, dated off and on for years, finally actually got married at 26. Neither of us had sex with significant others, it just didn't feel right. We were both virgins on our wedding night, and it was just so incredibly sexy and special.
I would say the experience itself was really hot, frankly. Not awkward at all. I love the fact that our entire sexual relationship is based on each other.

How can you be so sure about your husband?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did, we both did actually. Met each other at 17, dated off and on for years, finally actually got married at 26. Neither of us had sex with significant others, it just didn't feel right. We were both virgins on our wedding night, and it was just so incredibly sexy and special.
I would say the experience itself was really hot, frankly. Not awkward at all. I love the fact that our entire sexual relationship is based on each other.

How can you be so sure about your husband?

Not sure about pp, but DH and I met at 17 also and dated until we got married at 25. We were both virgins on our wedding night. I know for sure. Today is our 11th anniversary and we have 2 little ones.

[Anonymous]

I can't believe people didn't have sex until they were 25 or 26!

"it was so incredibly sexual and special"

I would certainly hope so, to miss out on the best 7 or 8 sexual years of your life!

If my children were still virgins in their late 20s I don't think I would feel I had done a great job of raising them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I didn't wait; we met when we were pretty young, and neither of us had a ton of experience, but not each other's firsts either. I've never had any regrets--have always figured it's all good, as all of our experiences made us the people we are for each other.
I was reading the book Kosher Sex by Rabbi Schmuely Boteach, and in it he claims that people who waited till they were married have a statistically lower rate of divorce than those who did not wait. I don't think his claim is backed by any sound evidence.

Might be folks who wait for marriage are then less likely to consider divorce/more likely to stay in a bad/unbalanced marriage.

How about not generalizing? Some know the person for years and most met when young-high school, college, or right after. In my twenties I knew a girl who was a virgin at 26-she wanted to wait for the right guy and marriage . She seemed very asexual. The general time frame among the hot or cool crowd in the DC private school scene is BJ by 3rd - 4rth hook up and intercourse in a month to 6 weeks. No exclusive relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't believe people didn't have sex until they were 25 or 26!

"it was so incredibly sexual and special"

I would certainly hope so, to miss out on the best 7 or 8 sexual years of your life!

If my children were still virgins in their late 20s I don't think I would feel I had done a great job of raising them.

This is your standard for being a good parent? How about raising your DC to be happy and secure in their choices. I'm 20:25 poster. My DH and I waited because we weren't ready to be parents. We both worked very hard putting ourselves through college and wanted to make sure that if I were to get pregnant that we could make a good life for ourselves and our DC. I didn't come from a small town, but we did come from blue collared workers and wanted an easier life, at least financially. In order to achieve that we knew that starting a family right away was not going to help us reach our goals.

We did other things to establish a healthy sexual relationship, but not as far as the southern belle comments earlier. I figured that if we were going to get married we had a life time of sex. Neither of us has regrets for waiting. I don't judge others who started earlier and don't understand the need to judge those that choose to wait.

I probably wouldn't have waited if I hadn't found my DH as young as I did, but that's not how my life went.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My DH and I waited because we weren't ready to be parents. We both worked very hard putting ourselves through college and wanted to make sure that if I were to get pregnant that we could make a good life for ourselves and our DC.

It's called birth control.