Just curious...did anyone actually wait until marriage to have sex?

[Anonymous]

I think posters should also disclose whether they are using the Bill Clinton definition of "sex". I had a "southern belle" acquaintaince from law school who is always proud to announce how she "saved herself for marriage" although I know for a fact that every orifice (other than the vagina) in her body has been breeched by multiple penises.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think posters should also disclose whether they are using the Bill Clinton definition of "sex". I had a "southern belle" acquaintaince from law school who is always proud to announce how she "saved herself for marriage" although I know for a fact that every orifice (other than the vagina) in her body has been breeched by multiple penises.

I knew lots of Catholic girls who also did this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be so sad to have remained a virgin until my 30s. Some of the best experiences of my life were with former boyfriends. I do have a friend who waited for religious reasons, and she doesn't regret waiting. Her life is also much slower and, to me, much more boring - the totally typical suburban mom. A lot of people who wait have a certain narrow view of life.

This is so ridiculous re: other people. I don't see how you can generalize about people who wait- and how does it affect you anyway?

[Anonymous]

So if someone else's life experience doesn't affect me in any way, I'm not allowed to have an opinion on their choices?

[Anonymous]

It was the last sentence that seemed so ridiculous. How do you know who waits and who doesn't and whether they have a narrower view of life than you do? Could be a million different reasons for waiting....

[Anonymous]

My very dear catholic friend waited until she was 39!! No joke!! We used to tease her and say if she had only waited 1 more year, we could call her the "40 year old virgin." She laughed and took it all in stride. She is happily married now.

[Anonymous]

PP here -- And no, she did not do like the southern belle mentioned above.

[Anonymous]

We waited. I married high school sweet heart. We married at 22 and 23. We had a really good sex life beforehand just no intercourse. Our wedding night was really cool and so was our honeymoon. I don't have any regrets about waiting in our situation; most of my friends would be shocked because we didn't broadcast our virginity- we are not religious zealots/southern belles. I would not necessarily want my kids to get married at 22 like I did because I think what I would look for in a life mate is different now at nearly 40 than it was at 22. My DH is really high drama/high maintenance/moody/ slightly immature which is tough to juggle with four little kids. He is also super self aware/good person/funny/creative/high sex drive/handsome/and a great Dad. I guess I'll keep him.

[Anonymous]

I didn't wait, but I only had two sexual partners prior to my husband so I wasn't really getting around either. I have no regrets and don't think my decision has had a negative or positive impact on my current sex life.

I'm just curious about those who did decide to wait. Did you wait because you wanted to "save yourself"? Was it because the "opportunity" (however you want to interpret that) never arose? Would you have waited if you ended up getting married later-in your 30's or 40's?

[Anonymous]

I guess I waited because I didn't want to get pregnant and because we knew we were going to get married right after graduation. We wanted the wedding night to feel really special and it did. DH (then bf) could have gone either way and there were other guys who wanted to go out with me. I feel like it was a real choice. I would not have waited if I had married later.

[Anonymous]

Didn't wait, but I've only had sex with my husband. Did wait til I was 24, married at 27. DH has slept with one other person than me. I think we are not the norm! But no regrets here.

[Anonymous]

Curious, for those posters who waited and got married really young (early 20s) did you marry because you were ready or did you marry because you wanted to have sex and did not want to have sex out of marriage.

[Anonymous]

I'm one who waited and married young- I really really thought I was ready and so did DH. I don't know if we really were or not. I guess I never had to face the, "OMG, what if I never find someone!" thing, but we were very immature in the begining. Maybe it would be easier if we had exposed other people to our immature crap and enterred marriage as more mature people?

[Anonymous]

My SIL waited.

I didn't wait until my wedding night by any stretch, BUT, my husband and I were each other's firsts (and yes, we are still each other's only!).

[Anonymous]

We didn't wait until married (shacked up together for years), but we met and married young (met at 19, married at 24), and have never been with other people.