Would you move to Singapore with teens/tweens?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you really love hot weather?

It’s not Dubai or DC in August.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

And when thinking about how long, it is much, much tougher for kids to move back to the US where people have gone to school together since kindergarten.

This^. Going is easy, living is fantastic. Settling back into American public schools is tough.

[Anonymous]

Hell yes!! My college roommate was in Singapore for high school (her Dad worked for ExxonMobil). She LOVED it

[Anonymous]

Assignment may end early or extend longer so its not in your hands to plan when to leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hell yes!! My college roommate was in Singapore for high school (her Dad worked for ExxonMobil). She LOVED it

Did she move back to high school in US or for college? That's the difference.

[Anonymous]

My sister moved abroad with her family when my nephews were 10 and 8. It was supposed to be short term, but they moved to a 2nd country instead b/c they love the expat life. She comes back to the US every summer with her kids and they see family/friends. My oldest nephew is now in college in the US and his brother is planning the same.

I have a freshman and would really struggle with the decision because she’s not a kid who adapts to change easily and she’s finally on solid footing post covid. I couldn’t imaging upending that because of the potential for it to go badly. Only you have an idea how your oldest (either way the one I’d be most concerned about) will think about it. It would be best if you could get her buy-in. And I agree with the pp - 3 years would be the limit and then I’d be moving back to the US with the kids b/c of their school ages. It really could be such a fabulous adventure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have 3 kids, ages 14, 11 & 9, in 9th, 6th and 4th grades. Dh is being asked to start an office for his company in Singapore and we are considering moving our family there for 2-4 years. Obviously we know this would have a huge impact on our kids and especially our eldest, and we are worried that it could be a huge mistake - but it also could be an amazing opportunity for us all.
Has anyone done something similar (not necessarily Singapore, the location isn’t really important), but the moving older kids during hs. We could potentially move dd for a year and then have her return to the states and live with her grandmother for junior/senior year of hs if that is important.

Friends of mine (military) went to Japan for a couple of years when their boys were elementary school age. They absolutely loved it. YMMV.

[Anonymous]

Kids are in a k-12 private and would see if possible to get them back there so they would be back with familiar friends after the time away. I guess it does make some sense to stay abroad until oldest graduates from hs and move back between 9th & 10th grades for middle.
And no, we haven’t decided anything, just very preliminary exploring options.
Dh would probably have a lot of control over how long he goes, as he would be the one establishing the office there and could set parameters but of course it’s impossible to know how much we’d all like it.

[Anonymous]

100% go! we did it for a year (not Singapore) with kids around the same ages. It only broadens their perspective on life, friends, family, and the world! logistics will work out fine, in our experience schools are very accommodating, so going back shouldn't be a problem. And if things don't work as expected, you can always come back.

And hard NO to sending back your oldest to live with grandparents. You only have a couple years left with your child, school logistics or college admissions are not more important that family life in those last formative years.

[Anonymous]

I'm kind of jealous, OP. I would do it because it sounds like an amazing experience for everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And does no one remember the American kid who spit out gum and had to get lashes??? I think I was HS then.

That happened literally 40 odd years ago

[Anonymous]

No way. Your oldest is too old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never do that to my oldest. Sorry. It is too late to pull Him for HS especially to a country like Singapore. You won’t have the same rights there and neither will he.

He’ll move back to US with no HS friends to visit when he comes home for the holidays.

It seems like you’ve made up your mind already but you have kids. Don’t do this to oldest. And to the Pp who said you all would bond over this- not being snarky, but do you have a teen?

I’m sure some kids would be more than fine, but what if yours isn’t. HS is a tough age

We did this to Western Europe for three years for elementary school. Fabulous experience- and I think you will regret NOT doing this. Similar family had the same chance as us - didn’t go for it and then regretted.

Your kids will be overwhelmed academically at first over there - all of them (Singaporeans speak 5 languages) but the really hard part comes when they return to sub-optimal schools here). So I would only worry about middle schoolers - but then again middle school sucks everywhere.

Focus on the freedom for your kids. This is something if you stay they will not have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never do that to my oldest. Sorry. It is too late to pull Him for HS especially to a country like Singapore. You won’t have the same rights there and neither will he.

He’ll move back to US with no HS friends to visit when he comes home for the holidays.

It seems like you’ve made up your mind already but you have kids. Don’t do this to oldest. And to the Pp who said you all would bond over this- not being snarky, but do you have a teen?

I’m sure some kids would be more than fine, but what if yours isn’t. HS is a tough age

We did this to Western Europe for three years for elementary school. Fabulous experience- and I think you will regret NOT doing this. Similar family had the same chance as us - didn’t go for it and then regretted.

Your kids will be overwhelmed academically at first over there - all of them (Singaporeans speak 5 languages) but the really hard part comes when they return to sub-optimal schools here). So I would only worry about middle schoolers - but then again middle school sucks everywhere.

Focus on the freedom for your kids. This is something if you stay they will not have.

Explain/expand on your last line? They won’t have freedom if we stay in the us or if we stay in Singapore?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never do that to my oldest. Sorry. It is too late to pull Him for HS especially to a country like Singapore. You won’t have the same rights there and neither will he.

He’ll move back to US with no HS friends to visit when he comes home for the holidays.

It seems like you’ve made up your mind already but you have kids. Don’t do this to oldest. And to the Pp who said you all would bond over this- not being snarky, but do you have a teen?

I’m sure some kids would be more than fine, but what if yours isn’t. HS is a tough age

We did this to Western Europe for three years for elementary school. Fabulous experience- and I think you will regret NOT doing this. Similar family had the same chance as us - didn’t go for it and then regretted.

Your kids will be overwhelmed academically at first over there - all of them (Singaporeans speak 5 languages) but the really hard part comes when they return to sub-optimal schools here). So I would only worry about middle schoolers - but then again middle school sucks everywhere.

Focus on the freedom for your kids. This is something if you stay they will not have.

Explain/expand on your last line? They won’t have freedom if we stay in the us or if we stay in Singapore?

NP. We have expat friends in Singapore and visit frequently. The freedom that my DD experiences there is incredible. We live in a west coast city and until DD’s first time in Singapore, she had never been in a situation where it was safe enough for her to walk into a public restroom alone at a museum or restaurant or similar. DD can play in parks and playgrounds with her friends in Singapore without us doing a needle check or scanning for crazy people or remnants of homeless encampments. We let her sit with her friends on public transit separately from us and wait for us solo at a table at a hawker center or even get her own food without our help. Sports are more culturally important than in most Asian cities and so even local school students have more well-rounded school experiences than is typical for Asian tweens and teens. We know more people there who are from Singapore and Malaysia than we do expats, so I can’t speak for the expat community but people there are interesting, warm and friendly. The unique mix of cultures and ethnic backgrounds in SE Asia is really exhilarating.

Obviously, this safety and freedom for even young kids comes at a price for some residents of the country and a lot of the labor that makes raising kids there easy exploits the financial poverty of guest workers’ native countries, but it’s a fabulous places for kids to grow up.

The downsides: unstable friend groups, obscene wealth and some really spoiled kids, local schools aren’t really an option for non-residents, lots of academic pressure, and some instability in international schools. For example, our friends who go to a Canadian school switched schools because the government ended the lease on one campus rather abruptly, so they had to scramble and apply out amidst the huge rush of new HK applicants. International schools are also huge if you’re used to smaller U.S. student bodies.