“ No gifts please” - what to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just bring a gift. It avoids any awkwardness of the being the only one empty handed. Better safe than sorry.

Do you not see that this is selfish?

One person gets to be comfortable and you are saying, “That person will be me, not the hostess who was gracious enough to invite me.”

This is NOT complicated people. The invitation literally came with instructions m.

You are a bunch of insecure sheep!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just bring a gift. It avoids any awkwardness of the being the only one empty handed. Better safe than sorry.

OMG.

Maybe if people stopped worrying so much about feeling awkward and started respecting the host's wishes, we could all stop stressing about this question.

Oh well. My experience tells me otherwise. So, now, gifts.

Your experience tells you what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you gauge what you do based upon those around you?

If people say they want no gifts, respect their wishes.

So odd that you felt the need to backtrack when others did something different.

Be confident and mature (=make your own decisions).

Because I was raised such that gift giving is appropriate. People wanting to change the rules feels strange to me. I'm confident enough to know my values and social norms. So I stick to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just bring a gift. It avoids any awkwardness of the being the only one empty handed. Better safe than sorry.

Do you not see that this is selfish?

One person gets to be comfortable and you are saying, “That person will be me, not the hostess who was gracious enough to invite me.”

This is NOT complicated people. The invitation literally came with instructions m.

You are a bunch of insecure sheep!

+ 1

And I get these same people who insist on being gifts also think it’s rude of the host to not send a thank-you note.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you gauge what you do based upon those around you?

If people say they want no gifts, respect their wishes.

So odd that you felt the need to backtrack when others did something different.

Be confident and mature (=make your own decisions).

Because I was raised such that gift giving is appropriate. People wanting to change the rules feels strange to me. I'm confident enough to know my values and social norms. So I stick to them.

Weird. I was raised such that respecting others is appropriate.

[Anonymous]

Omg WHY is this question asked on here so often? No gifts means no gifts! It's not that complicated!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just bring a gift. It avoids any awkwardness of the being the only one empty handed. Better safe than sorry.

OMG.

Maybe if people stopped worrying so much about feeling awkward and started respecting the host's wishes, we could all stop stressing about this question.

Oh well. My experience tells me otherwise. So, now, gifts.

Your experience tells you what?

A birthday party is a gift giving event, that's how I was raised so I go by what I know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you gauge what you do based upon those around you?

If people say they want no gifts, respect their wishes.

So odd that you felt the need to backtrack when others did something different.

Be confident and mature (=make your own decisions).

Because I was raised such that gift giving is appropriate. People wanting to change the rules feels strange to me. I'm confident enough to know my values and social norms. So I stick to them.

Weird. I was raised such that respecting others is appropriate.

Then you should respect that I have different cultural norms and values.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just bring a gift. It avoids any awkwardness of the being the only one empty handed. Better safe than sorry.

OMG.

Maybe if people stopped worrying so much about feeling awkward and started respecting the host's wishes, we could all stop stressing about this question.

Oh well. My experience tells me otherwise. So, now, gifts.

Your experience tells you what?

A birthday party is a gift giving event, that's how I was raised so I go by what I know.

Even if it’s selfish and an explicit violation of the wishes of the person who is hosting you? You’ll still go by what you know?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just bring a gift. It avoids any awkwardness of the being the only one empty handed. Better safe than sorry.

OMG.

Maybe if people stopped worrying so much about feeling awkward and started respecting the host's wishes, we could all stop stressing about this question.

Oh well. My experience tells me otherwise. So, now, gifts.

Your experience tells you what?

A birthday party is a gift giving event, that's how I was raised so I go by what I know.

Even if it’s selfish and an explicit violation of the wishes of the person who is hosting you? You’ll still go by what you know?

Yes, because I'm confident and mature in myself. I also don't know people tacky enough to put NO GIFTS on an invitation, so, there's that.

[Anonymous]

If you are one of the people who ignore the no gift request please only send a gift card then or something consumable.
We already don’t want more stuff which is why we said it, we definitely don’t want your regift stuff or plastic junk we’ll never use.

Side note: I’ve never said no gifts. Gifts bring my kid joy. If people ask for suggestions I give them suggestions that I think my kid would like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you gauge what you do based upon those around you?

If people say they want no gifts, respect their wishes.

So odd that you felt the need to backtrack when others did something different.

Be confident and mature (=make your own decisions).

Because I was raised such that gift giving is appropriate. People wanting to change the rules feels strange to me. I'm confident enough to know my values and social norms. So I stick to them.

Weird. I was raised such that respecting others is appropriate.

Then you should respect that I have different cultural norms and values.

An abstract disagreement with your cultural norms is not disrespectful. You ignoring the wishes (and the norms and values, I might add) of a host is disrespectful

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you gauge what you do based upon those around you?

If people say they want no gifts, respect their wishes.

So odd that you felt the need to backtrack when others did something different.

Be confident and mature (=make your own decisions).

Because I was raised such that gift giving is appropriate. People wanting to change the rules feels strange to me. I'm confident enough to know my values and social norms. So I stick to them.

Weird. I was raised such that respecting others is appropriate.

Then you should respect that I have different cultural norms and values.

An abstract disagreement with your cultural norms is not disrespectful. You ignoring the wishes (and the norms and values, I might add) of a host is disrespectful

I'm ok with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just bring a gift. It avoids any awkwardness of the being the only one empty handed. Better safe than sorry.

OMG.

Maybe if people stopped worrying so much about feeling awkward and started respecting the host's wishes, we could all stop stressing about this question.

Oh well. My experience tells me otherwise. So, now, gifts.

Your experience tells you what?

A birthday party is a gift giving event, that's how I was raised so I go by what I know.

Do you don't know how to follow directions?

No gifts please means don't bring a gift.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For an adult, no gift needed. For a child, always.

This is what I assumed but I've received an invitation for an adult birthday party suggesting gifts! If hosted at home I generally just bring wine or champagne if I know the person drinks.

For kids, mine always make a card when it says no gifts and a present with the card of it doesn't specify. Now that my oldest is in fifth and parties are no longer the entire class, it's a mix. For the younger ones, most parties are big and thankfully still say "no gifts."